


Into the Jungle

by madneto



Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternate Universe- Disney crossover, Big Bang Challenge, Ensemble Cast, Fluff and Angst, Half the cast are animals, M/M, Minor Character Death, Sexual Content, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-23
Updated: 2013-01-23
Packaged: 2017-11-26 16:11:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 56,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/652090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madneto/pseuds/madneto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever since he can remember, Erik's always been different from the rest of his family. He's tried to fit in, encouraged by his mother and his friends, but Logan, the troop's silverback, has never acknowledged him as one of their own. Still, Erik is determined to become the best ape ever, until one day, strangers arrive in the jungle. Strangers that look just like Erik.</p>
<p>Tarzan AU written for the X-Men Big Bang Challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A million, billion thanks to everyone who has helped and encouraged me while writing this monstrosity!
> 
> Thanks especially to [Miya](http://atelier-dayz.tumblr.com/) and [Morgan](http://msmarvelousbutt.tumblr.com/) for their wonderful beta skills which made the story actually readable, and to the beautiful and incredibly talented Sanny who drew me the greatest art ever (like, seriously, what kind deed did I ever do to deserve such art!?!) which you can find [here](http://sanny-pirate.livejournal.com/1661.html).
> 
> Thank you to everyone reading, and to the awesome mods at the X-Men Big Bang livejournal for organizing this. I hope you all enjoy it!

The flames that had almost entirely engulfed the massive ship were now licking at the man’s arm as he frantically lowered the only remaining lifeboat into the churning waters below. He gritted his teeth against the heat surrounding him and tried to focus on the rope sliding through his hands as quickly as he could let it without jostling the lifeboat’s passengers. But a tongue of fire had crept under the rope’s rigging, unseen by the man, and with a harsh snap, the rigging broke, falling into the ocean and taking the rope with it.

There was a splash and a yelp from below, and the man rushed to the side of the ship, his heart pounding in his ribcage, expecting to see the lifeboat smashed to pieces and the precious passengers struggling to stay afloat. All he saw when he frantically searched the water, however, was the face of his wife looking up at him, her eyes wide as she grasped the side of the unscathed lifeboat with one hand, and kept the other wrapped protectively around the baby boy clutched close to her chest.

Relief flooded through the man for the first time since the fire had started- the work of a crewman placing a lantern stupidly close to the cargo of gunpowder. He climbed over the railing on the edge of the ship, took a deep breath, and jumped.

~

A boom louder and stranger than any Logan had heard before echoed through the jungle. It certainly wasn’t a tree falling over; it was much too loud for that. No. Logan knew that what made those kinds of noises were usually humans; tall, ugly, untrustworthy, and greedy, with their shiny, odd weapons that killed anything in their path. Logan had encountered humans only shortly before he left his first troop, and he did not want his family now to have to share that same kinds of experience.

It was night-time, and everyone had already settled into their nests. Anna Marie, Ororo, and Jean were looking up at him for a sign of what to do. Edie, however, was looking at her son, cradling him to her chest. He was sickly, and Logan could see that he was fussing from being woken up (it was hard enough for him to get to sleep in the first place). A flash of sympathy washed over the huge gorilla.

Edie was not one of his mates. Her troop had been wiped out by the same sickness that her son had now; Jean had found them shivering and half-dead almost a month ago. Since then Logan had taken them in, never one to desert one of his kind, and while Edie had grown steadily stronger, her son had never fully recovered. Logan was beginning to doubt he ever would.

For a moment, he considered staying here to save Edie and her son from the stress and complications of moving. Almost immediately, he shook his head. They had to leave, to move further into the jungle, away from the potential threat. He had to protect his family.

He stood high on his back legs and beat his chest, a sign of leadership for the others that finally drew Edie’s attention away from her baby.

“Time to go,” he said, and began stalking off deeper into the jungle, certain the rest would follow.

~

It took nearly two weeks to build the house in the tree. The man and woman worked until it was finished: a fortress almost fifty feet in the air that was only accessible by a vine rope ladder. Through the three small windows of the one-room house, the small family could see the ocean to the west and the expansive African jungle to the east. Now that they were off the ground and safe from most animals, the man and woman could plan their return back to civilization.

Then the spring rains came, and they could barely leave the tree house to search for food, much less signs of other humans. Still, spring meant the boy’s birthday, and turning one year old was something to celebrate.

~

Cold and wet conditions this far into the forest usually were bearable, but Edie’s son was not well to begin with, and the chill only made him worse. Edie held him as tightly as she could, singing to him and shielding him from the wind and rain with her body while she watched his small form shake from the cold. She glanced up to see Logan making his way over. Wordlessly, he sat as close as possible to try and help block the wind.

“He’ll be alright,” he said so quietly Edie almost didn’t hear him. She almost wished she hadn’t; the words sounded empty.

~

After four months, the man, the woman, and the baby boy had all acclimated fairly well to life in the jungle. Both parents were getting quite good at finding the right sort of places to fish, and the woman had read of what sorts of berries were okay to eat before they had set sail purely out of curiosity. This meant they rarely didn’t have fruit to eat, and her husband often told her how grateful he was for her unexpected foresight.

Apart from the increasing aptness for finding food, the man and woman were entertained by a visitor who frequented the small porch outside the tree house. She was a beautiful, white bird with a shock of plumage fanning along the top of her head like a crown. She was usually there when the man and woman first stepped outside in the morning, and had soon gotten comfortable enough to let them carry her inside. She became a bit of a pet, and they grew quite fond of her.

Whenever they weren’t gathering food or plotting their escape from the coast, the man and woman would play a game, teaching their son and the bird how to speak.

“Vogel,” the woman said, smiling at the scene in front of her. Her son was staring at the bird, crawling slowly towards her and reaching out to try and grab her feathers, but the bird shied away.

“Vogel,” the boy and bird parroted back.

The man gave the boy a kiss on the cheek, and the bird a bit of dried fish. “Gut gemacht, Erik.”

~

“Edie,” Jean’s voice was hesitant, and Edie knew without turning that she wasn’t the only one waiting patiently for Edie to move. “Come on. Logan said it’s time to go back.”

“I can’t leave him,” Edie stated bluntly. “I won’t.”

“I know, sweetheart,” Ororo said gravely. “It’s hard. We all miss him. But you can’t stay here like this. We need to go back home. _All_ of us.”

If Edie hadn’t cried as much as she could already, tears would have pricked in her eyes, but there were no more for her to shed.

~

The man and woman had grown surprisingly comfortable in their little home. Their son was almost a year and a half, already saying his first words; watching and imitating everything so intelligently. They were happy, all things considered.

But they also were not native to the forest. They didn’t think to make their door strong enough, or keep their hunting spears close at hand while sleeping, and they didn’t know that leopards could climb trees.

~

Edie hadn’t been sleeping well for weeks, and was the first one awake as the sun crept over the mountains in the distance. Picking her way carefully around the others’ nests, she made her way out towards the watering hole on the edge of the jungle. Being near everyone else who slept so soundly just made her feel even more heartbroken.

While the sun steadily rose, Edie watched a flock of birds drinking and bathing in the deep pool close to the waterfall. This early in the morning, the jungle was quiet, peaceful. But just as she was considering turning back to the nests to see how many of the others were awake, a faint crying sound caught her ear. For a moment she thought she was imagining it, but no, it was there, the constant and undeniably upset cries of something very small. Edie didn’t even hesitate. Turning towards the sound, she ran off into the jungle in search of the source.

~

Vines and errant branches whipped at Edie’s face as she forced herself through the undergrowth. Slowly but surely, the cries were growing louder, and the foliage beginning to thin, while the scent of salty sea air grew stronger. Knowing she was getting close, Edie broke into a sprint, pulling herself forward with powerful arms and kicking off from the ground with strong legs until she burst through the tree line and into a small clearing near a stretch of beach.

She looked up, towards the source of the crying and saw a strange sort of shack built high in a ceiba tree. She went over to it and pulled herself up branch by branch until she reached the platform in front of the house.

Now that she was here, Edie moved more cautiously. What if the thing making the noise was actually luring her into a trap? This place was obviously built by humans, and everything Logan had told her and the other gorillas about humans had shown what violent and untrustworthy creatures they were. But somehow Edie doubted the thing making the noise meant her any harm. Still, she moved guardedly as she pushed open the door and stuck her head inside.

The house was dark, the windows shuttered against the light, but Edie could still make out some details. There was only one room. Up against the opposite wall was a bed, the sheets mussed as if someone had just woken up. A table and several chairs had been upturned. Two unmoving lumps were in the corner to the right of the bed, covered partially by the shredded remains of a makeshift couch. Edie could smell the blood spattering the walls better than she could see it in the darkness.

There was a louder, higher wail than before, and Edie remembered her reason for coming. She looked to her right and saw, in the corner, a small crib with a blanket draped over it. The blanket was wriggling frantically, and as Edie drew closer she knew this must be the source of the crying. Cautiously, she tugged at the covering until it slid down, revealing a small, bawling baby.

The crying immediately stopped as the baby saw the gorilla before it. Tears still welled up in its blue-grey eyes, but didn’t spill over. Instead, the baby wiped impatiently at its face, brushing at the tear tracks on its cheeks. It sniffed piteously, and Edie could hold still no longer.

She reached into the crib slowly and deliberately so the baby wouldn’t be frightened by her movements. It wasn’t, and soon enough, the child had been transferred from its mess of blankets into her arms. It hiccupped softly and snuggled closer to her, small fingers tangling in her fur. A small smile quirked up the corners of Edie’s mouth for the first time in what felt like ages. The child was engrossing so much of her attention that she didn’t notice the white bird glide in through the open door and perch itself on top.

“His name is Erik,” the bird chirped solemnly.

Edie whirled around, one arm curled around the baby and the other raised, ready to fight. She relaxed as soon as she recognized who was speaking. “Emma,” she said, relieved. She had known the bird for a few years; she was friendly enough, even though she could sometimes give off a supercilious air. Now, however, she looked sad as she glanced around the small house.

“I knew this family. They were shipwrecked here. It looks like a leopard…” Emma trailed off, tearing her gaze away from the corner with the motionless bodies. She shook out her plumage and turned back to Edie with a rueful tilt to her head. “They liked to try and teach me human words. The boy’s name is Erik.”

Edie looked down at the boy in her arms. He rubbed at his drooping eyes again before blinking up at Edie curiously. Edie smiled, and raised one of her fingers for the boy’s own small hand to wrap around.

“Erik,” she repeated, and the boy looked up at her.

There was a flutter of feathers, and Edie felt sharp claws dig lightly into her shoulder as Emma perched there to look down at the boy as well. “He’s only about a year. They had a party for him during the spring rains. I was there,” the bird explained quietly. “Poor thing. He’ll die out here without his family.”

Panic flared in Edie’s chest, and she held Erik closer. He didn’t seem perturbed at all, still too busy examining Edie’s hand.

“No, he won’t,” Edie said. “I’ll make sure.”

Emma flapped over to the side of the crib in a sudden flash of wings. Her eyes were skeptical as they watched Edie watching Erik. “Are you sure? Logan--”

“It doesn’t matter what Logan says,” Edie interrupted. “I’ll take care of him. Right, Erik?”

Hearing his name again, Erik looked up. A wide grin spread across his face, exposing his tiny, white teeth. He gurgled, then closed his mouth to blow spit bubbles in a hum. Edie set him up straighter against her chest, making the bubbles dribble down his chin until she wiped them off. Erik grabbed her hand and shrieked happily.

Emma continued to regard them with a stern eye. “Well, it’s your funeral,” she chirruped dourly, fluffing her feathers once more before taking off through the open door.

Edie ignored her. “Come along, Erik,” she said, exiting out the front door and closing it soundly behind her with one last sympathetic look towards where Erik’s parents lay. “Let’s go meet the rest of the family.”

~

“Absolutely not.”

“Logan-”

“Have you not listened to anything I’ve told you?”

“He’s a baby! There’s nothing he could possibly-”

“Edie, _no!_ ” Logan roared, his sharp teeth bared.

Edie was unflinching, but Erik, still in her arms, took a huge gulp of air and started to wail again. The sound made Logan freeze, and the expression of unbridled anger dropped from his face. He looked down at Erik as the little boy turned to burrow deeper against Edie’s fur. He frowned.

“Was he alone?”

“Of course. His parents are dead.”

Logan snorted irritably, but there was a flicker of doubt in his eyes. “Fine. You can keep him. But he’ll never be one of us.” He stalked off through the jungle, away from the little boy’s cries.

Edie gathered Erik close, instead of following and trying to argue, and walked to her nest, further off from the others. “Don’t cry, sweetheart,” she said, patting his back soothingly to quiet him once they were nestled comfortably inside. “It’ll be alright. I’ve got you now.”


	2. Chapter 2

_Six Years Later_

The sun had just risen over the top of the mountains in the distance when Edie’s eyes blinked sleepily open. She reached one great arm out to her side, wanting to make sure Erik was still sleeping peacefully beside her, but instead of her son’s tiny, familiar body, all she felt were leaves and bits of bamboo. Immediately, her heart leapt to her throat.

“Erik!” she called out, sitting up and glancing wildly around the nest, pulse pounding. “Erik, where-”

A great trumpeting noise like an elephant erupted right behind her ear, making her jump almost a foot in the air. She held her arms out as she turned, ready to defend herself. Instead of an elephant, however, she saw Erik, dangling from an errant vine, laughing hysterically. Edie frowned, simply watching him twirl slowly in mid-air until he calmed down.

“Got you, Mama!” he managed finally around the last of his giggles.

“Yes, very good job, Erik,” she replied dryly. “Do you want to give me a heart attack?”

“If you think the elephant is good, you should hear my leopard,” he said, ignoring his mother. “I’ve been working on it, here, see?” He hissed, scrunching up his face into a snarl and dropping to the ground onto all fours menacingly.

“Very frightening, dear,” she replied, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Why don’t you think up your own noise?”

Erik tumbled out of the nest, running on all fours out towards the watering hole and testing out different sounds in a yell. Edie winced. Maybe telling him to make up his own call wasn’t such a good idea.

~

Erik sprinted as fast as he could through the underbrush. He had seen Alex, Armando, and Sean watching a herd of elephants in the deep lake by the waterfall, and he wanted to catch up with them before they ran off somewhere else. He heard them laughing and talking and sped up, bursting suddenly into sunlight and running headlong into Alex’s back.

“Whoa!” the gorilla shouted, pitching forward into Sean while Erik fell back on his butt. “Watch where you’re going, baldy.”

The boy shied back quickly. “Sorry, Alex,” he said, ducking his head down to show his sincerity.

“To be fair, you should have heard him coming,” Armando said, his shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter. “Was that you making all that noise?”

“Mama said I should make my own call,” Erik explained, lifting his head up to nod.

Sean chuckled. “It sounded like a howler monkey being sat on by Logan.”

Alex and Armando burst into laughter again, but Erik just smiled, holding back his own giggles. Somehow, he felt that if he joined in, Logan would find out about it and dislike him even more. That, and this was one of the first times that the other two hadn’t told him to go away, or made excuses that they had to run off as soon as Erik had showed up.

“So… what are you guys doing?” Erik ventured after the others had quieted down. Sean, Armando, and Alex looked at each other sideways.

“Just watching the elephants,” Alex answered, crooking an eyebrow briefly at the other two.

Erik frowned. “Oh. Okay.”

“Yeah,” Sean piped up quickly, “I dared Alex to go get a hair from one of their tails, but he’s a little scaredy-cat. He’s definitely not cool enough to hang out with us.”

A sudden thought struck Erik, and he sat back more proudly on his legs. “Too scared to get an elephant hair? That’s baby stuff.”

“Baby stuff, huh?” Alex asked, eyes wide.

“Yeah,” Erik replied, sniffing nonchalantly. “I’ve gotten loads of elephant hairs before.”

Sean scowled. “I don’t believe you.”

“Fine,” Erik said, frowning back and baring his teeth. “I’ll go get one. Then you’ll see I’m not a liar.”

Armando looked nervously between all three of them and opened his mouth, but Alex jumped in before he could say anything.

“Well, go on then, baldy,” he said, sneering. “Let’s see you do it.”

Erik’s stomach lurched nervously, suddenly aware that he was in a very dangerous position. But he had to prove himself to the others, or they would always be running off and leaving him to go bug his mom. His whole life he had been an outcast, just because he looked different from the others. He had had to fight for every scrap of attention from everyone save his mother. Well, he was tired of it. Today he was going to prove himself to all the others. He was going to get that elephant hair or die trying.

Erik lifted his chest proudly again, giving Alex and Sean one last determined look before he stalked off towards shore, slipping easily into the water when he reached its edge, and swimming out to the middle of the lake where the elephants were bathing.

~

Hank was not like other elephants. Hank liked to learn about things and know about the world around him, but unfortunately, most things in the jungle were harmful or treacherous. Like the water the rest of his family was bathing in. Didn’t they know hundreds, if not _thousands_ of animals bathed in and drank from that lake every day? Hank shuddered, his giant ears flopping against the side of his head, when he thought of all the microbes and bacteria that must be seeping into the pores of his family even now.

Cautiously, he dipped the tip of his trunk into the water, not wanting to stick and entire foot in and risk infection. As soon as it had gotten wet, he wrenched his trunk away from the water, holding it up in front of him for inspection. He couldn’t see anything that looked dangerous, but just because he couldn’t see it didn’t mean it wasn’t there. He squinted, bringing the trunk closer to his face when something in the water caught his attention.

Something big and dark that was _swimming right towards his mother._

“Mom!” he shouted from the bank, stomping nervously as he warred with himself between going out into the bacteria-infested water that obviously contained a shark, or saving his mother and the rest of his family. Gathering up all his courage, he let out a squeaky trumpet and jumped into the water.

“Mom!” he called, swimming as fast as he could. “Mom, there’s a shark!”

His mother turned, looking at him exasperatedly, but just as she opened her mouth, all hell broke loose.

Hank’s uncle let out a loud trumpet and a shout, stampeding into the group of bathing elephants and causing a complete riot. The water churned with the confused rearing and stomping of the angry herd. Shouts and trumpets rent the air, every once in a while a sharp shout of pain intermingling with the other sounds. 

It was so chaotic Hank had to run back to the shore for fear of being trampled, which was a good thing too, because soon after he reached the bank again, the entire herd seemed to get into some semblance of order and charged out of the water and into the jungle, crushing everything in their path. Distantly, Hank could hear the terrified shrieks of birds as they flew out of the forest, and the growling of a family of gorillas. He sighed, getting ready to follow his panicking herd, when more shouts caught his attention, this time from the bank not far off.

He turned and saw a small group of gorillas, probably not much older than himself, pulling someone out of the water. He ran over to them.

“Be careful!” Hank cried when he reached them. “It’s a shark, don’t you know-”

The gorilla with the lightest colored fur turned on him, worry evident in the furrow of his brow and the set of his shoulders. “It’s not a shark, bozo, he’s my cousin!”

“Your cous-” Hank began, but the gorilla had turned away and bent over the odd, pale creature with the others.

“Erik!”

“Erik, you idiot!”

“Erik, come on, buddy, wake up!”

Hank looked down doubtfully at the still body, but just then, the thing gave a huge, wracking cough, water spilling out of its mouth. The gorillas gave loud whoops of happiness, the one with the darkest fur immediately moving to prop the hairless gorilla up off the ground.

“You’re alive!” the lightest gorilla said, grinning.

The gorilla with the reddish fur let out a sigh of relief, shoulders relaxing. He fell back on the ground in a mock faint. The dark gorilla rolled his eyes.

“Alex, kick Sean for me,” he said. The light gorilla’s foot sprung back, connecting with the red one’s stomach, making him let out an indignant shout. He turned back to the hairless gorilla still slightly propped up on his arm. “Erik, are you crazy?”

Erik, who had been coughing and gasping while his cousins fought, looked up with an unexpected grin. He held out his fist. “Told you.” His hand opened, showing five dark elephant tail bristles. “Baby stuff.”

The other gorillas’ jaws dropped.

“FIVE?!” Alex shouted. “How in the- Armando! He got five!”

The darkest gorilla nodded, still staring dumbstruck at Erik’s hand.

Erik sniffed somewhat smugly. “Well, it was easy. You know, once they were in a group and distracted. No one could see me when they were all busy running around.”

Before any of the others could begin to say anything congratulatory, however, there was a great roaring from the jungle and the sound of several large animals running out of the brush. When the gorillas heard the noises, they immediately grew sober, dropping onto all fours and hanging their heads. Hank shrunk back behind them, not wanting to get between the young gorillas and their parents.

They didn’t have to wait long for five females and one massive silverback to come walking out of the forest. One of the females, dark brown with a pinched sort of look about her eyes saw Erik wet and cowered on the ground and went over to him immediately, scooping him up in her arms.

“Erik, what-” she began, but the silverback cut her off.

“What happened here?” he asked, sitting back on his legs to make himself as tall as he possibly could. None of the gorillas spoke. “Someone is responsible and I want to know who it is. Scott almost got trampled.” He gestured back to a tiny gorilla with dark fur, clutching at his mother.

To everyone’s surprise, Erik pushed his way out of his mother’s arms, crawling slowly up to Logan. “It’s my fault,” he said quietly. “I was trying to- I just wanted… I’m sorry, Logan.” He held out a hand, palm up as a gesture of supplication, but Logan ignored it.

“What were you thinking?” he asked, his voice dangerously low. “You could have gotten yourself killed, not to mention everyone else.”

“I didn’t-” Erik began, but then his mother scooped him up in her arms again, turning to Logan.

“It was an accident,” she said, shielding the boy from the silverback. “Erik would never do that on pur-”

Logan bared his teeth, silencing Edie, and Hank could see the way Erik’s face fell even though he tried to hide it in the sweep of his hair. “He’s been doing this for almost seven years, Edie, he’s never going to learn. You can’t keep pretending like he’s going to be one of us. He doesn’t belong.”

It was as if Erik wasn’t even there. Tears welled up in his eyes, listening to what Logan was saying without even trying to pretend that Erik couldn’t hear. He let out a noise halfway between a sob and a yell and shrugged quickly out of his mother’s arms, running towards the jungle as fast as he could on all fours, leaving Hank and the others to stare in surprise and confusion.

~

Erik wandered through the jungle by himself for the rest of the day, finding some nice ripe bananas to soothe the growling of his stomach. But as night fell and sleep slowly started weighing down his eyelids, the boy found himself back at the watering hole close to where his family was nesting.

He had barely had anything to drink all day, so he went to the water’s edge and scooped some into his hands to drink. As soon as he saw his reflection, however, he paused, thinking. Even if he had won the respect of his peers with his stunt that morning, he had certainly lost any hope of winning Logan’s forever. He frowned at his twin in the water, snarling and gnashing his teeth at himself, getting more and more angry until finally he was hitting the surface, distorting his face, and screaming loudly enough to wake a family of birds in a tree nearby. He tried his own, shrieking call, but it sounded stupid; nothing at all like Logan’s loud, intimidating roar.

He kicked violently at his reflection then, losing his balance and slipping into the mud at the edge of the bank. He let out an even angrier shout, missing the crunch of a branch behind him.

“There you are,” Edie said softly.

Erik jumped up, wide eyed, whirling around until he noticed the person who had spoken was his mother.

“Looks like I got you back for this morning,” she continued, trying to make Erik smile, but it was no use. She sighed, drawing closer and trying to wrap him in her arms to carry back to their nest, but Erik shied away, ignoring the flicker of hurt in his mother’s eyes.

“I can’t go back,” he insisted, looking for the world like that was all he wanted to do. “Logan said I don’t belong. I’m too different.”

“No you’re not,” Edie replied immediately. “You’re my son.” Erik just stared miserably at the ground. The gorilla’s brow furrowed in thought for a moment before she smiled cautiously at the boy in front of her.

“Here,” she said, drawing him closer with her foot, relieved when he came this time. “You know what I see when I look at you?” There was no reply, but Erik did look up. “I see two eyes, just like mine,” she ghosted her fingers over Erik’s eyelids when he closed them, “a nose, just like mine,” she bopped him on the nose and he finally grinned, “two ears-”

“Two hands?” Erik broke in, grinning.

Edie smiled softly back, nodding and holding up her hands so Erik could rest his own against them. As he did so, however, the smile slid from his face. He pulled away slowly, looking from his hands to hers, his expression growing more and more upset. Edie heard a sniffle escape, and he turned away. She frowned.

“Okay, now, my darling,” she began, trying desperately to regroup. “Forget what you see.” She pushed his hand up against his chest. “What do you feel now?”

There was another small sniffle. “My heart,” Erik replied finally, looking up at her with red-rimmed eyes.

She gathered him on one foot and scooped him up towards her own chest. “And now?” His small head rested against her.

“Your heart,” he answered, looking up at her suddenly. His eyes seemed less wet now.

“That’s exactly right,” she said, hugging him closer and feeling his small hands dig into the fur of her arm comfortingly. “See, darling? We’re exactly the same. Logan is just… too scared to see that.”

The fingers stroking her fur stopped and Erik pulled away abruptly. “Well then, I’ll make him see,” he said decidedly. “If I can get five elephant hairs, I can do anything.”

Edie laughed in response. “I’ll show him, Mama,” Erik promised, snuggling back into her fur. “I’ll be the best ape ever.” He had never meant anything in his life as much as he meant this.

~

When Erik was ten, he roped a heron at the watering hole and rode it through the termite towers where Alex, Sean, and Armando were having a snack, leaving them to stare, impressed, at the retreating bird and the boy flopping around dangerously on its back.

~

When Erik was twelve, he taught himself how to swing from vine to vine above the worst of the dense foliage. The others could never quite get the hang of it.

~

When Erik was thirteen, he learned how to make a spear out of a sharpened rock and a broken branch. His new invention proved not only to be a good weapon, but also a fast way of getting the best fruit from the tops of trees.

~

When he was fifteen, Erik perfected his own call, but seemed to be the only one in his group of friends to be impressed with the final result.

~

When Erik was eighteen, he fought a boa constrictor and won, tying it up in knots.

~

Erik was twenty-four and wrestling Sean for the best piece of fruit from their latest haul, being goaded on by Alex, Armando, and Hank, when he heard the loudest noise he had ever heard in his life; an explosion that crackled and echoed throughout the jungle. It was a noise that would soon change the lives of everyone who heard it, but it would change Erik’s most of all. 


	3. Chapter 3

“What was that?” Armando was the first to speak up as they all stared off towards the origin of the strange noise.

“I don’t know,” Hank replied, his ears flapping nervously. “But it didn’t sound good.”

Sean slipped out of Erik’s chokehold easily now that he was distracted. Out of the five of them, Erik was the only one whose eyes were distant, not looking closely for an immediate threat, but searching out far beyond the relatively short distance they could see from the forest floor.

Alex punched Erik’s arm hard, making him flinch and turn to glare at the gorilla.

“What was that for?” he asked, willing himself not to rub his smarting shoulder.

“We should go back home,” Alex said, looking bewildered back at Erik. “What’s up with you, man?”

Erik frowned. When he was younger, he might have agreed with the others and gone back, wanting to be safe and protected by his mother and Logan. But he was grown up now; he could fend for himself. Besides, if he could find out what it was that had made the sound, he could go back and tell his family, and then Logan would have to at least acknowledge his tracking and hunting skills.

But more importantly, the noise was unlike anything he’d ever heard before. Something about it made him curious, not afraid like the others were. Could there be another animal in the jungle, making that sound? It certainly warranted investigating. At any rate, he would take his spear with him in case things got dangerous.

Erik looked back towards where the noise had come from. “You go,” he answered, grabbing his spear resting by the pile of fruit before crouching down onto one arm. “I’ll be along later.” With no further ado, he sprinted off through the forest, only vaguely hearing Sean shout, “It’s your funeral!” before he jumped and grabbed the nearest vine with his free hand to swing more quickly towards the sound.

~

He estimated he had swung almost all the way to the edge of the jungle and the beginning of the beach by the time his ears picked up the sound again. It was much closer this time, probably only several hundred yards in front of him, inside a bamboo thicket. There were other noises too now; voices that chattered almost like a bird, but deeper and more guttural than any Erik had ever met. In truth, though, the chattering didn’t even come close to any other animal call Erik had heard before, and was even stranger than the loud crackling noise had been, but at the same time it was so intricate, Erik _knew_ it must be another set of animals speaking in their own language. He cocked his head to the side, thinking, as the strange voices drew closer.

“- got to be here somewhere,” said one, voice deep. Accompanying it was the _shink_ of something slashing through the air. The area just outside of the bamboo was clear of foliage, but off to the side there was a tree. Erik took shelter behind it, just in case.

“We’ve been following this trail for hours,” a higher voice answered, sounding weary.

Through the thicket of bamboo, Erik could see dark shadows, the slashing noise making them clearer- they must be somehow cutting down the bamboo as they made their way through. Erik was sure his spear could do that on a smaller scale. He wondered if the animals’ weapons were similar to his. He stepped out curiously, not intending to do more than peek, but he didn’t look where he was stepping, and a small twig snapped loudly underfoot before he could prevent it.

The figures froze, and a second later, the same loud cracking noise echoed through the jungle, this time so loudly it made Erik’s ears ring. He ducked quickly behind the tree again, his back pressed flat against the bark. Just to the left of the trunk, mere inches from where his head had been, there was a large, smoking black mark in the ground. 

Erik released a slow breath, his heart hammering in his chest. He wondered briefly if the others had been right to go back, but then the voices started up again, and Erik’s curiosity once again outweighed his nervousness. Still, he climbed carefully up into the tree so he was high above the ground, at a good vantage point in case the animals decided to use the exploding thing again.

“Really, Mr. Shaw.” That was another voice, still higher than the first speaker, but different from the second. “You’ll have given us all a heart attack for no reason.”

The first voice grumbled, and then there was a rustling, the whistling noise of something whipping through the air, and the sound of the last of the thick bamboo falling. Erik’s heart almost stopped as he saw the other animals step into the small clearing,

They looked _just like him_. Well, truthfully, not _just_ like him. For one, the one carrying the two big, silver sticks- one broad and sharp, and one long and circular- had short, dark hair cut close to his head, while Erik’s was long and twisted. The one with the silver sticks also had hair on his face, but it was short, and only under his nose. Erik always cut the hair on his own face as close to his skin as possible using the sharp edge of his spear; he found if it grew too long it got in the way.

The other two had long hair; one with blonde, and the other brown, but no hair on their faces. Erik’s sense of smell was not as good as the other gorillas in his family, but he could guess from their statures that the one with the sticks was the alpha male, and the other two were probably his mates.

They stood on two legs. All of them were wearing coverings, like Erik, except they were wearing more of them. He could barely even see the mates’ legs they were so bundled up, and all their arms were all covered to at least the elbow. Erik thought the wraps must be very constricting; he only ever wore the bare minimum on his lower half, and never anything on his torso.

The skins their coverings were made out of were odd too. In fact, they didn’t look like skins at all. They looked soft and were wildly colorful. Perhaps they were some assortment of leaves? But the alpha was talking again, and Erik focused on what they were saying, even if he couldn’t understand.

“I’m telling you, Miss MacTaggart, I heard something,” he addressed the dark haired female.

“But it could have been a gorilla!” the blonde one spoke up, frowning. “And you could have frightened it away. Charles would be so- wait, Charles!?” she called behind her.

“I’m here, Raven!” another voice called, this one almost as deep as the alpha male’s. There was a scuffling sound, and then another one of the animals was stepping into the clearing. Erik froze, eyes widening and then squinting, head tilting to the side again.

This newcomer was dressed almost the same as the alpha, in tan leg coverings, dark, worn leather around his feet, and a light blue, almost white top, stained with sweat around the neck and under the arms, but his face was different; smooth and hairless. His eyes were bright, and so blue that Erik could tell their color from his perch several feet above the scene. His hair was dark brown, a few reddish strands standing out in the bright sun, and his lips were deep red, just a shade darker than the flush on his cheeks. The bridge of his nose, parts of his cheeks, and most of his forearm looked like they had been speckled with mud, dark spots standing out against mostly pale skin.

While the alpha swaggered, this male moved easily, comfortably, and quickly, and spoke as much with his face and body as he did with his voice. Still, he was obviously several years younger than the other male, whose face had more lines, and whose temples were flecked with grey. In fact, the newcomer probably wasn’t too far out of childhood, but if it wasn’t for his age, Erik guessed he would have been leading the group. The females seemed much more drawn to him, relaxing when he emerged from the brush and smiling when he trained his own smile on them. Erik even found himself drawing closer, pulled in by the other male’s magnetism, wanting that smile to turn towards him.

“You can’t keep wandering off,” the blonde one scolded lightly.

The newcomer ducked his head apologetically. “Sorry,” he said, brushing a lock of sweaty hair out of his face, “everything’s just so interesting; I keep getting side-tracked.”

“Do try to keep up, Mr. Xavier,” the alpha said, looking around, shoulders still set and eyes alert. “We wouldn’t want you getting lost.”

The other male frowned slightly at him. “Well, I’m sure I’d be able to find my way back if I did. You keep shooting that horrid thing off every five minutes, it wouldn’t be hard to track.”

The alpha quirked an eyebrow at him, smiling in a way that Erik recognized as thinly aggressive, and not friendly at all. “You hired me to protect you, Mr. Xavier,” he said, bringing the long, circular stick up to tap against his palm lightly.

“And you’re doing a marvellous job of it so far,” the other cut in, “but I can’t help but think you’re also scaring away the gorillas. We _need_ to see them, they’re the whole point of us coming here.”

“Well, we aren’t going to accomplish anything standing here and talking,” the brunette cut in, and the others nodded, the younger male looking slightly chastised. “The trail continues just ahead, doesn’t it? Let’s keep going.”

They all started forward again, the alpha leading the way, the brunette after him, the blonde after her, and the other male at the back. He glanced around as he walked, clutching some odd collection of leaves, which he opened occasionally to make marks in with a small stick.

They had only made it a few feet out of the clearing, Erik following silently behind them through the canopy, when the young male looked off to the side and paused. He looked surreptitiously at the backs of the others before turning away, walking off towards a tree opposite Erik.

“Hello…” he cooed, moving slowly forward. Erik crawled further out along a branch to get a better look, his spear at the ready should the other have found something dangerous. The male seemed to be creeping towards a bird. Erik recognized her almost immediately; Emma would sometimes fly by the area where his family was staying, but she rarely spoke to Erik. In fact, she seemed to avoid him. Erik thought she must not want to get further on Logan’s bad side, since he tended to think Emma was a pest and drove her away most of the time.

Emma was not shying away from the newcomer, though. Her head tilted to the side, and she ruffled her feathers experimentally as he approached. The male paused again, waiting for Emma’s feathers to un-fluff before cautiously opening his odd leaves again and making markings on one of them. He muttered to himself as he worked. 

“Some kind of cockatiel? Maybe brought here by some sailors who’d been to Australia or so- oh! No, wait! Don’t go!” His face fell as Emma started and flew away.

But Erik was suddenly too nervous to care. Until now, he had been too entranced by the other animal like him to notice just how quiet the jungle had gotten. Something was definitely wrong. The other male seemed not to have picked up on the sudden hush, however, or if he did, he was unfazed by it. He sat with his back against the tree trunk, head tipped back and eyes closed. He seemed almost to be dozing off, lost in thought, when a fierce growl pierced the silence. His eyes shot open again just in time to see a leopard jump out of the forest in front of him, mouth open and razor-claws poised to strike. He covered his face with his arm, crouching into a ball. A frightened sob ripped itself from his throat as he felt powerful teeth catch on his boot, but suddenly, the jungle cat was crying out in pain. His shoe was gone, but his foot was intact.

Erik had swung down on a vine into the leopard, knocking it sideways and into a small clearing. His world narrowed down to the threat in front of him as he and the cat circled each other, the person behind him almost completely forgotten, except the small part of his brain that told him to keep the fight away from him. The leopard growled at him, and Erik hissed right back, imitating it almost perfectly from his years of practice.

The leopard seemed confused for a moment, but then it hissed again, haunches wriggling slightly before it pounced. Erik was ready though, and he sprang to the left, putting himself between the leopard and the other male and striking forward with his spear. It caught the cat in the shoulder, and the animal screeched in agony.

Knowing the cat was vulnerable, Erik lunged again, but the leopard ducked out of the way. It jumped up onto a tree branch and pounced down at Erik, knocking him on his back. He let out a yell, pushing at the leopard’s torso with his feet so it couldn’t claw his legs, and knocking its teeth away with the shaft of his spear. He kicked the leopard off him, but the cat was upon him as soon as he jumped to his feet again, swiping four long but shallow cuts across the right side of his chest even as he rammed the blunt end of his spear into the side of its ribcage.

Erik yelped in pain and heard another shout behind him. The leopard, momentarily stunned by the blow to its side, quickly recovered and hissed at Erik, raising its paw. Before it could strike again, however, the thing that the other male had been wearing on its foot flew out of nowhere and hit the cat on the side of the head. Both Erik and the leopard whirled around and looked in astonishment.

The other male was standing by the trunk of the tree, looking scared but determined. His arm was still slightly raised, and his chest was heaving. The leopard jumped into action before Erik could, snarling and pouncing, making the other male jump to the side with a shout. Erik quickly came to his rescue, hurtling himself at the leopard before it could turn. Once again, Erik barrelled into its side, knocking them both into a thicket of undergrowth.

~

Charles crouched on the ground, every muscle tensed as he stared at the bush the leopard and the Wildman had disappeared into seconds before. It was shaking terribly, shouts and growls emanating from it, until finally, there was a high, piercing shriek so guttural that Charles couldn’t tell which it had come from. He shrunk a little further back, half-standing, and listening with all his might for any clue as to the outcome of the fight.

Oh, this _would_ happen to him, and before he had encountered any gorillas, and thus had no primary research for his thesis.

Not hearing anything from the bushes, he inched forward, only to shrink back again with a shout, falling to the ground when a yellow body with spots flew out from the leaves. He steeled himself, expecting to feel sharp claws digging into his flesh.

Several seconds passed before he realized he wasn’t feeling anything except the wild beating of his own heart.

His eyes jerked open, and he lowered the arm he’d thrown over his face. Looking up, he saw the carcass of the now-dead leopard lying on the ground a meter away from him, red splashing the fur around the broken end of a spear lodged in its chest. Despite it trying to kill him, Charles couldn’t help but feel a brief pang for the lost life of such a beautiful creature.

His eyes continued to travel upwards, and he saw, standing over the body, the Wildman, wearing nothing but a loincloth and a curious expression. Charles’ heartbeat, which had slowed upon noticing he wasn’t being ripped to shreds, began pulsing quickly again as he and the man stared at each other.

Suddenly, with a loud clap of thunder, the skies opened up and rain began pouring down in buckets. The man craned his head up at the opening in the canopy of trees and frowned. Then abruptly, he grabbed hold of Charles’ arm and pulled him to his feet. Before Charles could really register what was happening, a strong arm was wrapping around his waist, and he was being hoisted into the air, the Wildman’s other hand grasped onto a vine as he swung them into the trees.


	4. Chapter 4

They reached a large branch that seemed to be to the Wildman’s liking, because he dropped them both down onto it. Charles immediately shied away, backing against the thick tree trunk. He stared at the Wildman crouched on all fours a few meters away who was staring just as intently back at him.

_Okay_ , Charles thought. _I’m in a tree with a Wildman who kills leopards and apparently only wears a loincloth._ His eyes flickered downwards for a fraction of a second, before he snapped them back up to meet the other man’s eyes once more.

He didn’t have much time to be embarrassed, though, because the Wildman was moving forward now, steadily, watching Charles’ face for any signs of aggression. All Charles could do was sit frozen against the tree trunk and watch as the man drew closer. His head was cocked to the side, and he frowned in concentration as he noticed Charles’ naked foot. Immediately, he crouched, both hands coming out to examine the appendage, and Charles found his voice.

“Oh, um, excuse me,” he said, trying to be as polite as possible while the man poked and prodded at his foot, inadvertently tickling it in the process and jerking away when Charles yelped and almost kicked him. “Sorry, that’s- that tickles- I can’t really control- oh- wait, you- stop it-”

The man’s hands were traveling quickly up his leg now, managing to reach mid-way up his inner thigh when Charles came to his senses and actually did kick him away. The man grunted in surprise as he landed on his back against the branch.

“No!” Charles said firmly, frowning and pointing threateningly at the man with his index finger. “Stay back. Just because you saved my life doesn’t mean that you get to…” He trailed off. The man was paying no attention to what Charles was saying; instead, he was staring at Charles’ hand, his eyes as big as saucers. Slowly, he crept forward once more.

“What are you doing?” Charles asked quickly, scooting away from the man as possible. The man continued to stare at Charles’ hands with something akin to wonder. “I’m warning you, I’ve- my sister won’t take kindly to you-” The man was upon him now, his face so close Charles could feel his breath hot against his cheek as he turned away. Charles curled his hand into a fist and flung it at the man, but he was quick and caught Charles’ wrist, shooting Charles a somewhat unimpressed look and sitting a little further back.

The man’s hands were rough- of course that was to be expected from a life in the jungle- but his touch was soft. He held Charles’ right wrist just firmly enough so that he wouldn’t immediately pull away, but loosely enough that if Charles wanted to, he could wrench his arm free. Though his heart was once again fluttering in his chest, Charles didn’t move. There was something in the other man’s face that was pleading with him, like he had just discovered the greatest thing in the world and needed to understand it. Charles could somewhat sympathize with him. After all, he was here on an exploratory expedition of his own. Besides, the man wasn’t tensed to attack, and his grip on Charles’ wrist was soft. He wasn’t going to hurt Charles; not right now anyway.

And, if Charles was being honest with himself, he was rapidly becoming just as interested in the Wildman as the Wildman was in him. After the initial shock and the whole loincloth thing wore off, the scientific part of Charles’ brain was starting to find him fascinating. From the way he was looking at Charles, it was as if he’d never seen another human being before. Charles relaxed despite himself as he watched the man stare at his now slightly uncurled fist with wide eyes.

With painstaking caution, he brought his own, calloused hand up to Charles’, releasing his wrist in the process. Charles didn’t withdraw, keeping his hand hovering in the air as the man’s fingers slid up his wrist, uncurling Charles’ fingers until their hands were pressed flat together. The man’s hand was bigger than Charles’, his palm more elongated where Charles’ was square, and his fingers long and thin while Charles’ were short and sturdy, the nails bitten down after days of frustrating gorilla hunting without any results.

In silence, the man stared at their hands for a long while, his chest beginning to rise and fall more quickly the longer he looked. Charles could see the excitement and thinly veiled hope when he looked up again, his eyes meeting Charles’ with the slightest crinkle around their edges hinting at a smile. He leaned in closer, making Charles jump back slightly, but then the man’s head was resting against his chest, right over of his heart.

Charles let out a slow breath that certainly did _not_ sound like a whimper, thank you very much, and kept his eyes looking up through the branches of the trees above them. When the man withdrew, he was smiling widely. Charles had just enough time to think, _My, what a lot of teeth you have_ , before the man was grasping his head lightly and pulling him down to his own, much more muscled and _much_ more naked, chest. Against Charles’ ear, the man’s heart hammered as his chest rose and fell softly, his fingers threaded gently through Charles’ hair.

Charles closed his eyes and took a deep breath, pushing away from the man’s torso while trying to ignore the firmness of his chest. He smiled weakly when he was once again resting against the trunk with the man a healthy distance away.

“Thank you,” he said, nervously. “That was, um. Very… welcoming.” Perhaps in whatever culture this man came from, that was a polite greeting, and even if the man didn’t seem to be able to understand him, Charles didn’t want to be rude. “And, uh… thank you for saving me back there, too. It was very… brave.”

The man smiled enthusiastically, sitting up straighter on his legs, although he still braced himself on his arms instead of sitting up properly like Charles. He made a noise deep in his throat, and then hopped a little closer in excitement. He raised his arms, pointing them emphatically at himself.

“Erik,” he said, smiling with anticipation. His voice was deep and oddly smooth.

“Erik?” Charles asked, slightly nonplussed.

The man’s grin broadened, and he made another sort of hooting noise in response. The look in his eyes seemed to intensify, as if he was asking a silent question.

“Are you German?” Charles guessed, completely lost.

“Are you German?” the man- Erik- parroted back. Still smiling, he reached out a hand and gently touched Charles’ shoulder. “Are you German?” he pointed back to himself. “Erik.”

A frown creased Charles’ brow for a moment, until he realized what Erik meant, and he laughed; perhaps a bit harder than the situation warranted, but he was starting to feel a little light-headed with the events of the morning so far, and he thought he deserved the chance to fall into slight hysterics. Erik simply watched him, the smile off his face slipping as Charles doubled over and waved an apologetic hand in the air.

“No, no,” he finally managed when he was able to catch his breath. “I’m Charles Xavier.” He straightened up, wiping at his eyes.

“I’m Charles Xavier,” Erik repeated, this time a bit more carefully, as if afraid he would set Charles off again.

Charles shook his head, smiling lightly now, and looking Erik purposefully in the eye like he might when teaching a small child. “No, here-“ he pressed a hand to his chest and said clearly, “Charles.” He moved to poke Erik softly in the chest. “Erik.” His hand came back to rest on his own chest again. “Charles.”

“Charles,” Erik said, his grin returning and crinkling the corners of his eyes.

“Exactly,” Charles replied, allowing himself to just gaze languidly at Erik for a few moments, drinking in the obvious happiness on his face, while the creeping implications of finding a human in the jungle started to flicker through his thoughts.

When he allowed his eyes to sweep a little lower, he noticed, with a start, the four shallow cuts across the right side of Erik’s chest. They were bleeding, but not horribly- obviously, since Charles had only really noticed them now. Still, especially with all the grime in the jungle, Charles thought it would be best to take Erik back to camp to clean and dress the wound properly.

“That doesn’t look very pretty,” Charles said, pointing to Erik’s chest.

Erik looked down. “Pretty.”

“Well, yes, in general.” Charles blushed furiously even though he knew his words must just sound like gibberish. “But I was more referring to the cuts.” He pressed his fingers cautiously to Erik’s skin, and the man winced, making a noise of protest that sounded somewhat like a growl. “Sorry,” Charles said, withdrawing his hand quickly. “I just… wanted to make sure…”

Erik was looking steadily at him. Well, rather, he was looking steadily at his temple, and raising a hand to touch it.

“What’s the- ouch!” Charles jerked away from the other man when he brushed over tender skin. There was just a dab of red on the end of Erik’s pointer finger, and when Charles brought his own fingers up to brush over his skin, he felt a small cut, already healing, near his hair line.

“Well, that’s barely anything compared to your scratches,” Charles mused, wiping his hand impatiently on his trousers. “All the same, could you take me back to my camp? We’d both better get cleaned up. Germs are killers, you know.”

“Germs are killers, you know,” Erik echoed, also mimicking Charles’ movements as he stood up.

“Quite right,” Charles said absentmindedly as he inched his way along the branch, using the one above as support. Growing at the end were some vines like the one Erik had climbed, and Charles assumed it was their easiest way down. Erik followed lithely behind him, peering at closely at Charles’ back, even going so far as to sniff at his neck.

Charles whipped around, almost losing his hold on the branch above for a moment before righting himself. He glared at Erik, who immediately stepped back, head drooping apologetically.

“As pleasant as your company is, I don’t think we’ve quite progressed to that level yet,” he said sternly, knowing how hard Raven would be rolling her eyes if she were here. Erik kept his head down, but slowly raised his hand, palm up.

Charles started. That was a sign gorillas used to ask for forgiveness. Before coming to Africa, Charles and Moira had been able to work with gorillas in the London zoo, studying their mannerisms and daily life. They had come to Africa in the hopes of observing gorillas in their natural habitat; Charles was going to write his thesis on the similarities between gorilla and human behavior, drawing much of his research from Darwin’s _Origin of Species_ , which fascinated him endlessly. Evolution, and the possibilities therein, were so absolutely staggering that often, when Charles thought about it, he felt he would burst with excitement. And now there was a man, standing right in front of him, with the mannerisms of a gorilla. Could he be some sort of link in the chain; one that showed species did not have to be so different from each other?

Trembling, Charles reached out and dropped his fingers lightly into Erik’s palm. The other man looked up, not quite meeting Charles’ eyes at first until the shorter man ducked his head down, smiling softly. “Apology accepted.”

As abruptly as it had started, the rain stopped, and the sun was out again. Erik looked up fully now, ducking around Charles and walking confidently to the end of the branch. He grabbed hold of a vine, tugging on it to make sure it was sturdy.

“Oh really, this is worse than Oxford,” Charles grumbled as he made his way to Erik carefully. When he looked up, Erik was watching him with obvious amusement. “Well, no,” he conceded quietly, “it’s not.”

~

Charles decided almost immediately that he did not enjoy traveling by vine. Erik had insisted that Charles climb onto his back using many expansive hand gestures and grunts, and while being plastered to Erik’s back was not an altogether unpleasant experience, Charles’ stomach was not used to the sensation of flying. Also, he couldn’t get the image out of his head of a vine suddenly snapping, and the both of them falling to the ground and breaking their necks.

 

“There! There!” Charles shouted, pointing to the clearing where he could see the tops of several tents sticking up in the air.

Erik swung them around obligingly, dropping to the ground just out of sight of the camp. It was a good move, Charles suddenly realized. If any other others, especially Shaw, saw a strange man dropping into camp, they’d probably panic, which might not end up very happily. As soon as he had gotten his bearings, however, Erik was bounding into the camp on all fours, shooting a smile back over his shoulder.

“No, wait! Erik!” Charles ran after him, ready to spring into action if any of the others threatened Erik, but as soon as he rounded the corner of the tent, Charles froze.

There were three gorillas and, oh good lord, an _elephant_ playing in the trashed ruins of their camp, throwing dishes and books up into the air and shrieking as they fell back down to earth. Charles gasped in amazement as Erik bounced up to the gorilla with the lightest fur and tackled it, making it shout and kick back, which Erik easily dodged. He hooted at the gorilla, turning to motion to the others who were creeping up interestedly on all fours.

The elephant stayed back, however, having noticed Charles. Its ears flapped, and Charles felt his stomach twist. He tensed, getting ready to run for it if he needed to, but Erik seemed to have noticed the elephant’s wariness and pulled on its trunk, hard. The elephant trumpeted, but it seemed more annoyed than aggressive now. Erik hooted at it too, frowning, before turning to Charles. He grinned and, still on all fours, walked over to Charles, taking his hand.

“Charles,” he said, almost reverently, looking up into Charles’ eyes. He tugged slightly on his hand, leading them back towards the others. “Charles,” he repeated, standing up slightly to poke Charles in the chest. “Charles.”

The other gorillas looked absolutely bewildered. After a moment, the one with the darkest coloring approached warily, sniffing at the air. Charles crouched, smiling and holding out his free hand to show he meant no harm. As soon as he did, however, all the gorillas and the elephant shrank back. Erik’s grip on his arm tightened almost painfully.

“What did I-?” Charles began, but he was cut off by a loud, angry snort right behind him. Erik relinquished his hand, stepping back several paces, as Charles slowly turned.

Standing not a foot in front of him was the biggest silverback he had ever seen, and it looked very, _very_ put out.

“Oh my.” Charles barely had time to drop to the ground before the giant gorilla was roaring, its sharp teeth bared and ready to strike.


	5. Chapter 5

Charles barely registered himself curling into a ball; all of the sudden his knees were in his face and he was shielding his head with his arms while the giant silverback roared above him. There were two large thumps on either side of his body, and he curled even closer on himself as the animal began to sniff at him. He stifled a whimper in the back of his throat, making sure to keep absolutely still as the feeling of hot, putrid breath brushed across his hair and face. No noise was coming from the other animals in the clearing.

At long last, the silverback straightened up with a grunt, stepping around Charles with obvious contempt. Charles let his eyes flicker open briefly to see the back of the massive animal, its head tipping back slightly as it let out another short roar before heading out of the camp. The other gorillas and the elephant followed after him obediently, heads tipped down in obvious submission.

Erik, however, was still sitting on all fours, rooted to the spot. He looked helplessly between Charles and the retreating troop, seemingly unable to decide which one was more important to him. Charles sat up, his eyes locking onto Erik’s, but all he could do was stare, too petrified still to move or to urge Erik to stay. The darkest gorilla, however, seemed to have noticed Erik wasn’t following, and hurried brusquely over. It grabbed Erik’s arm, making both him and Charles jump, and hooted lowly.

Erik glanced back at Charles forlornly as he let the gorilla drag him slowly away, turning over his shoulder so their gaze held until he was pulled into the underbrush of the jungle. He had been gone for almost a minute when Charles finally went limp, falling backwards. All the air whooshed out of his lungs in a rush as he hit the ground with a somewhat painful thump. He ignored the pain, however, staring up at the light blue sky dotted with clouds, and breathing steadily; in through his nose, out through his mouth.

It must have been several minutes later when there was a frantic rustling from behind him, making him straighten to his feet, worried that perhaps the gorillas had come back. All that emerged from the tree line, however, was a very frazzled looking Raven, a worried Moira, and a guarded Shaw.

“Charles!” Raven and Moira said in tandem, hastening forward as Charles sagged with a relief. 

He pulled Raven quickly to his side, pressing a reassuring kiss to her temple and attempting a smile. “I’m fine,” he said before they could say anything.

“What the hell happened here?” Shaw asked, peering around the camp and kicking at a broken tea set with the toe of his boot.

Charles started suddenly, realizing that no one else had seen what he had seen today. “Raven!” he said too loudly, grabbing her gently by the shoulders. He glanced over at Moira. “Moira.”

“What?” Moira asked, taken aback by his abrupt change in disposition.

“We were out walking, right?”

“Yes…” Moira replied uncertainly.

“But I saw a bird off in the undergrowth. I went over,” he hurried on excitedly, releasing Raven so he could talk with his hands while the two women nodded incredulously, “so I could sketch it. It was beautiful- like a cockatiel- but it can’t have been because those-”

“-are from Australia,” Moira finished, nodding vigorously.

“Spit it out, Charles, what happened?” Raven broke in, exasperated.

“I went up to the bird,” Charles continued, crouching lower, and re-enacting the whole scene, “but suddenly, it flew away, and I turned around _and there was a gigantic leopard._ ”

“A leopard?” Raven gasped.

Charles shook his head. “A _leopard_. And Raven!” Raven looked at him expectantly, her eyes wide and her hands covering her mouth in shock. “It took my boot!” He raised his leg to point forcefully at his naked foot.

“It took your-” Moira began, but Charles cut her off.

“But then I was rescued! By a Wildman in a loincloth!” Raven and Moira stared at him, completely nonplussed. Charles paused, feeling a blush rising high on his cheeks. “He had a spear,” he explained a little more weakly now. “He killed the leopard and took me back here. I think some of his family must have been looking for him because they had totally trashed the place by the time we arrived.”

“His family?” Shaw asked. He had apparently made his way over to the rest of them while Charles was telling his story. “A group of Wildmen?”

“No, _gorillas_ ,” Charles said, grinning broadly. “I think they’re his family, anyway. He left with them.”

“He?”

“Erik,” Charles replied, looking back over his shoulder to the spot where Erik and the others had disappeared. “The ape-man.”

“Erik?” Raven piped up, looking completely lost now. “Is he German?”

Charles smiled. “No,” he answered quietly, still looking off into the jungle. “I don’t think so.”

~

“No one is to go near those animals or any of their things again, do you understand me?” Logan’s voice was deceptively quiet, but no one in the troop could ignore the way the silverback’s eyes were practically glowing with anger.

Armando, Alex, Sean, and Hank all kept their heads lowered and eyes downcast, too scared that making themselves conspicuous might raise Logan’s ire. Erik, however, was starting to feel a bit angry himself, but the anger was beginning to mix with confusion and, above all, an insidious sense of betrayal. The whole combination of emotions sank low in the pit of his stomach, making him feel hot and vaguely sick. His eyes prickled uncomfortably, but he refused to look away from Logan, who was standing on a large tree root that jutted out of the ground, high enough above the rest of the troop that they could all see and hear him.

“We need to protect our family,” Logan concluded. “We are all responsible for each other.”

“But I talked to one of them,” Erik suddenly shouted, unable to contain himself any longer. “They’re not dangerous, I swear! Charles was-”

“Enough!” Logan bellowed, and Erik clamped his jaw shut immediately, though not happily. He could feel all of the others staring back and forth between himself and Logan as they glared at one another. “If you’re not going to obey the rules of this family,” Logan continued, “then I suggest you find another one.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Erik saw Sean’s jaw drop, but at that moment he didn’t care at all about the reactions of the others. It was as if something inside him broke; some tiny, gnawing hope that one day he might prove himself and not be the freak that everyone else whispered about behind his back, as if he didn’t know how they all felt about him anyway. All his life the only person who had fully accepted him was his mother, but even today he had learned that she had been lying to him. He wasn’t an ape; he was whatever Charles was, and his mother had to have known. Erik bared his teeth menacingly at Logan.

“Erik,” he heard his mother’s voice cutting anxiously through the tense silence but he ignored her. He was too furious, too betrayed to think of the consequences of his actions.

If Logan wanted him to find a new family, then good, he’d already found one. Erik was done trying to be an ape when he so obviously would never fit in, and when it seemed so many people in the troop didn’t even want him to. Logan was snarling back at him now, raising himself on his back feet, but Erik was quicker. With a sharp, short growl, Erik leapt to his feet, getting a running start before launching into the air for a familiar patch of vines. He didn’t dare to look back as he swung blindly into the forest, for fear of the expression he would see on his mother’s face.

When he was far enough away that he could no longer catch traces of the troop, he finally allowed himself to swing up onto a sturdy-looking set of branches, catching himself nimbly and turning so he could lean up against the trunk. He rested his head against the rough bark, closing his eyes as his breathing, quick from excitement and exertion, returned to normal.

He wouldn’t return to the nests tonight he resolved; this natural one was safe and sturdy enough. A nagging part of him pointed out that his absence would make his mother sick with worry, but he forced that voice to silence itself, ignoring also the swell of guilt that followed. Sighing, he drew his legs up closer to his body, letting his eyes fall open again to see the last rays of sunlight sinking beneath the canopy. It was not long after the spring rains, and a damp coldness still hung in the air. Without another body to snuggle up to, Erik rubbed his hands together for a bit of warmth.

And then he stopped as abruptly as he’d started. Frowning, he raised his hands to his eye-level, pressing the fingers and palms together. A curious feeling washed over him as he remembered the way Charles’ hand had felt against his own; soft and warm, and somehow fitting just perfectly. The look on Charles’ face, too, when their gaze had locked once more, had been gentle, and more than a little astonished; Charles had been just as intrigued by Erik as Erik was by him.

The corners of his mouth twitched upwards at the memory of the light in those astonishing eyes, such a bright blue that looking into them was almost like looking into the sky. Erik shook himself slightly, bringing himself back to the present and feeling the coarseness of bark at his back once more. Tomorrow, he would go and see Charles again. In the meantime, he curled in close to himself in the middle of the makeshift nest, letting his eyes droop slowly closed as he repeated the strange words he’d learned that day over and over in his head: _Charles, Are you German, Pretty, Charles, Germs are killers you know, Charles, Charles Xavier…_

~

“He was built like a man, but he moved exactly like a gorilla,” Charles explained as he sketched furiously at the chalkboard. “Slouched over and everything, which I found curious at first, but then when I saw him with the troop, I thought ‘Well, that explains everything, doesn’t it?’”

He stood back, eyeing his handy work for a moment before deeming it worthy and turning it to show Moira, Raven, and a distracted Shaw, who was cleaning his rifle.

Immediately, Raven and Moira jumped forward to closer examine his rough sketch of Erik crouched on all fours, dreadlocks- and had he done those himself, or were they just the result of a life in the jungle with less bathing and more mud?- falling around a, for now, featureless face. Charles had thought it unimportant to go that detailed at the moment; he was far too eager to talk about Erik at the moment than sketch him perfectly.

“Oh,” Raven cooed appreciatively. “All men should be born in the jungle.”

“Thank you for that,” Charles laughed, but he was glad Raven and Moira were too enthralled to notice the blush that spread across his cheeks.

“Interesting; he still walks on his knuckles,” Moira remarked, pointing to Charles’ drawing. “Surely that must hurt?”

“It could,” Charles answered. “Although he has presumably been doing it since he was very young. Perhaps he’s just used to it by now. At any rate, he didn’t walk on all fours all the time. It did seem his primary mode of transportation, however.”

Moira was absolutely beaming at him. “Charles, do you know what this might mean?” she asked, her eyes sparkling.

Charles nodded, trying to contain his grin and only barely managing it. “That’s what I thought as well. But look here, his features were nothing like a gorilla- or, more accurately, were completely human.” Charles picked up the chalk again, gently nudging Raven out of the way so he could mark down Erik’s strong, sharp nose and thin lips; his fascinatingly expressive eyes. “He must have been following me. I mean, why else would he have saved me from the leopard? He was very cautious, though, at first. I’m not even sure he would have intervened if he hadn’t of had to.

“At first he was completely disbelieving. It was like he’d never seen another human before. He had no concept of personal space whatsoever… he saw my hand and it was like… like…” Charles trailed off, unable to quite find the right words for what had transpired between the two of them, staring into the drawing’s eyes and suddenly wishing they were the real things.

Behind them all, Shaw snorted, making Charles jump. They turned, Moira looking extremely affronted.

“Something funny?” she asked, an eyebrow raised somewhat icily. 

“A Wildman who lives with gorillas? One who’s never seen humans before, and is named Erik? Sounds like a load of rubbish to me,” Shaw said, smiling as he snapped the barrel of the gun back into place, and completely ignoring everyone else’s obvious annoyance. “Poor old Charles here probably just got a little confused, wandered off, and got a bit too much sun. I _did_ tell you to wear a hat.”

Charles frowned. “I didn’t hallucinate him,” he said, temper starting to rise at Shaw’s arrogant dismissal. “Erik is real.”

“We believe you,” Raven cut in, walking up to Charles and putting a bracing arm on his shoulder. “I’m sure Erik is a lovely-”

Just then there was a loud snap of a twig from the tree line on the far side of the camp, the same way Erik and the gorillas had left from. Charles’ heart leapt in anticipation, hoping against all hope that the man had returned, but out of the corner of his eye, he saw Shaw bring his gun up to his arm and prepare to fire.

“No!” Charles shouted.

Not knowing what else to do, he shoved at the barrel of the gun, pushing it far to the left just as Shaw pulled the trigger. The shot knocked over a small sapling at the edge of the clearing, cutting right through it. Charles glared at Shaw, opening his mouth to remind him what a cut in his pay check he would receive should any wildlife come to unnecessary harm, when suddenly, a voice piped up from the tree line.

“Charles?”


	6. Chapter 6

Charles spun around and saw, heart hammering, to see Erik stepping cautiously out into the camp, crouched over slightly, as if he was unused to standing completely upright.

“Charles?” Erik said again, looking suddenly unsure. His eyes darted from Charles, to Raven, to Moira, to Shaw, then back to Charles.

“Erik,” Charles breathed, moving forward slowly, and smiling encouragingly. “Erik, you came back.”

From somewhere behind them, he could hear Raven whisper, “This is amazing.” Most of his attention, however, was devoted to the man in front of him. He looked slightly more haggard than he had yesterday, and oh, Charles hoped that he hadn’t gotten into some sort of trouble with his troop. The silverback had seemed awfully upset. As soon as Charles moved closer, though, Erik lost a bit more of his shyness, stepping right up into Charles’ space as he had done the day before.

“Charles,” he said softly, reaching up to brush a semi-curled hand across Charles’ cheek in an affectionate gesture. Charles swallowed.

Moira’s voice suddenly came from his immediate right. “Look! Look!” she said excitedly, pointing to Erik’s hand and Charles’ cheek. “That’s something gorillas do to others they feel friendly towards.”

“Charles, you’ve made an ape friend!” Raven exclaimed, laughing delightedly next to Moira.

The noise seemed to finally draw Erik’s attention away from Charles’ face. He turned abruptly towards them, head cocked to the side in curiosity. In the blink of an eye he had moved from Charles to Raven. She squeaked in surprise as Erik peered closely at her face so their noses were almost touching, and reached up to feel her hair, but Raven, to her credit, didn’t pull away. In fact, after the initial surprise, she smiled encouragingly.

“Technically he’s not an ape,” Charles pointed out, but he was grinning as well.

Erik seemed to be satisfied with his inspection of Raven and moved on to sweep his eyes over Moira’s features before grabbing the pith helmet from her head. He put it close to his eye, his brow knotted in confusion. Charles guessed he was trying to figure out what it was made from. The Wildman ran his fingers over the painted, hardened cork, rapping it with his knuckles. His eyebrows rose at the sound, and Moira laughed, smiling when Erik politely held out the helmet for her to take.

“Thank you, Erik,” she said, inclining her head towards him.

Erik smiled back. “Thank you,” he replied, then turned to Charles. “Thank you. Charles.”

“You neglected to mention he could speak English,” Shaw’s voice brought Charles crashing back down to reality. He turned. Shaw had advanced while the others had been so absorbed in watching Erik. It was with a twinge of alarm that Charles noticed the way the bodyguard was eyeing Erik.

“He can’t,” Charles answered, facing Shaw to keep his full attention while he heard Raven and Moira introducing themselves behind him. “Not really. He’s just mimicking whatever we say. That’s what he did with me yesterday.”

Charles had intended to keep Erik as far away from Shaw as he possibly could, but a second later he felt a broad hand on his shoulder, and Erik’s chest was warm against his back.

“Charles?” Erik asked, and it was definitely a question. Charles turned his head, meeting Erik’s gaze before he turned to look at Shaw, then back to Charles again.

Fighting back a sigh, Charles moved so he could face the two of them. He put a hand to Erik’s chest (oh dear, they had never gotten around to cleaning those leopard scratches yet, had they?). “Erik,” he said, moving his hand to point at the bodyguard. “Shaw.”

“Shaw,” Erik repeated, and it was hard to place why, but Charles _really_ did not like the smile that Shaw offered back.

“Erik,” Shaw said serenely. “Perhaps you can take us to where the gorillas are?”

But Erik was already moving past Shaw, heading further into the camp. He tossed a questioning look over his shoulder at Charles, asking permission to continue. Charles nodded, smiling, and followed after him as he bounded forward, his target the chalkboard. It still had the picture of Erik sketched across it, and Erik seemed to realize it was him.

_Higher thinking, then_ , Charles noted, thinking about Darwin’s writings, but really, he was already convinced of Erik’s intelligence. He was a man, after all, even if he hadn’t grown up around other humans.

Raven and Moira had hurried over as well, and they all watched as Erik picked up a piece of chalk and began marking a jagged line along side of the drawing. Charles’ face was beginning to ache from the force of his smile.

“Chalk,” he said, stepping up to the whiteboard, which Erik had somehow managed to perch on, his loincloth thankfully still covering everything. Really, they were going to have to chat about that as soon as Erik could speak enough English.

Erik looked up, seeing Charles take another piece of chalk from the box lying on the small ledge at the bottom of the chalkboard.

“Chalk,” Charles repeated.

“Cholk.”

Charles pointed to the chalkboard. “Chalkboard.”

Erik grinned. “Chalkbohhrd.” He turned back to the picture. “Erik.”

“Yes,” answered Charles, unable to hide the small smile of his own.

Erik flashed Charles another toothy grin before he raised the chalk in his hand once more, his attention focused back on the chalkboard. Suddenly, he began scribbling all over it. “Chalk!” he shouted triumphantly. “Chalkboard! Chalk! Moira! Raven! Shaw! Chalkboard!”

Raven and Moira laughed delightedly as the drawing of Erik quickly got covered up by squiggles, Erik still repeating the new words he had learned like a particularly uplifting mantra. He was so excited, however, his movements so exuberant, that he leaned just a little too far back to examine the blackboard, and promptly sent the whole thing crashing to the ground on top of him in a heap.

“Erik!” Charles exclaimed, rushing forward to lift the easel and chalkboard up, but Erik was already crawling out from underneath it, looking more than a little shocked.

“I’m afraid it’s not bolted down,” Charles explained over his shoulder to Erik as he righted the whole thing. “You’re not hurt are you?”

He crouched down to Erik’s level, sweeping his eyes across the man’s body to make sure there wasn’t any terrible damage. Erik held still as he did so, seemingly too surprised to move. Instead, he watched Charles with an inscrutable look on his face, which Charles fastidiously ignored.

“No harm done,” he proclaimed after a moment. “Although you do still have those cuts from yesterday. I’d… would it be okay if I cleaned them? It really would make me feel better. Who knows what kinds of germs might get into it otherwise.”

“Germs,” Erik answered, moving forward slightly. He reached up and briefly brushed his fingers across Charles’ cheek once more, smiling reassuringly as he did so. Charles felt his throat go dry, mouth gaping slightly as he thought in vain for something to say. Quickly, he shut his lips and cleared his throat.

“It looks like you’ve tried to shave,” he said, standing and holding out a hand to help Erik do the same. “I can help you with that, too, if you want.”

Erik didn’t answer him- of course; he couldn’t, but he obediently followed while Charles led the way to the tent they all used as a sort of washroom. Raven and Moira stayed behind, whispering animatedly to one another.

The flap that served as a door was already tied open, so Charles marched right in with Erik in tow. Against one wall was a washbasin, sitting on top of a small vanity, and in front of the vanity was a stool. Charles went over and patted the top of it.

“You can sit here, Erik,” he said.

Erik looked at him sceptically, his brow furrowed in concentration. Sensing his confusion- and feeling a little foolish for not realizing Erik wouldn’t know how to use a chair in the first place- Charles took pity on him. Making sure Erik was watching, Charles very pointedly sat down on the seat and faced the mirror, turning over his shoulder and raising an eyebrow at the man for emphasis.

Erik seemed to have caught on, because he immediately smiled shyly at Charles again, and gently nudged him out of the way, clambering up awkwardly onto the stool on all fours. Once he reached the top, he sat, still slightly hunched over, his legs draped on either side of the chair and his hands clutching at the front of the seat. Well, it was hardly good posture, but Charles wasn’t picky. Offering Erik an approving grin and a nod, he turned to the small medicine cabinet in the corner of the room, returning to the vanity with a bit of gauze and some iodine.

He opened his mouth to warn Erik that this might hurt a little, but his expression suddenly turned soft. The man was leaned as far forward as he could manage, the better to examine himself in the mirror. Those eyes that seemed to alternate from blue to grey were wide with amazement.

Of course, Charles realized, Erik had seen his reflection before; otherwise he would not have known the drawing on the blackboard earlier had been him. This must be the first time, however, he had ever seen himself with such clarity. The look of wonder on Erik’s face was absolutely breathtaking, and Charles suddenly felt the slightest ache in his chest at the sight of it. After just a moment, he allowed himself to move forward and touch Erik’s shoulder, breaking him out of his revere.

“As I said before,” Charles said quietly, “very pretty.”

“Very pretty,” Erik repeated breathlessly.

Charles smiled.

~

Wanting to get the hardest task out of the way first, Charles had shown Erik how to shave with his straight razor; a project that had ended with almost an entire bottle of shaving cream wasted, but at least neither one of them had lost any blood. Erik also seemed much happier clean-shaven, running his hands over his face, and remarking at himself in the mirror happily. He was turning out to be rather vain.

Charles had then moved on to the slightly more cumbersome job of cleaning the scratches from Erik’s fight with the leopard. He had, to the best of his ability, tried to warn Erik that the iodine was going to hurt, but the language barrier had proven harder to break down than he expected.

Erik let out a sharp bark of pain, flinching away from the gauze Charles was holding, and practically falling into Charles’ chest in the process. Trying to ignore what it would look like if any of the others finally decided to walk in, Charles wrapped his free arm around Erik’s shoulders, holding onto him tight.

“Shh,” he soothed softly. “I’m sorry, but we have to clean this. I don’t want it to get infected.”

Erik made a noise like a whine, looking up at Charles imploringly, but when he saw the other man’s unflinching gaze he stopped, thinking for a moment. Charles waited patiently while Erik weighed the pros and cons of letting Charles continue. Finally, he steeled himself, looking back up and catching Charles’ eye.

He watched for a moment, trying to detect anything sinister in the startling blue gaze, but the only emotion he could make out was sincerity. Erik frowned. True, he barely knew Charles- didn’t even know what it was Charles was doing to him, except that it stung- but somehow it felt better to let Charles take care of his wounds. Surely it that meant the other man felt Erik was as important as he was. Erik could only hope.

Gravely, he nodded to Charles for permission and gritted his teeth against the expected pain. Luckily it wasn’t as bad as it had been the first time, now that he knew what to expect. Charles still hurried to wash away the dried blood from around the scrapes, moving as quickly and efficiently as he could until, soon enough, the cuts were clean and bandaged. Erik, who had been leaning into Charles since he first fell against him, straightened up, poking lightly at the plasters.

“Oh, no, no,” Charles chastised, grabbing Erik’s fingers. “Don’t touch them.”

“No,” Erik said quickly, moving his hands behind his back to show he wouldn’t continue picking at the bandages.

Charles smiled softly at him; seemingly ready to say something else, when a familiar voice came from the still-open door of the tent.

“Now that your friend is all washed up,” Shaw said, swaggering into the tent, “perhaps he could take us to the gorillas?” Without waiting for Charles to answer, he bent down so he was practically nose-to-nose with Erik and holding out one of the textbooks Charles had brought. “Gorilla,” he said, pointing to drawing of a troop using sticks to catch termites.

“Gorilla,” Erik answered, taking the book from Shaw’s hands. The bodyguard grinned widely, turning to Charles to say something about inferior communication skills, when there was a loud ripping noise.

“Erik, no-” Charles began, attempting to wrest the book from Erik, but the ape-man had already launched himself off the stool, tearing out more and more pages from the textbook with widening eyes, and throwing them delightedly in the air.

“Gorilla!” he exclaimed. “Gorillagorilla _gorilla_ gorill-”

Charles snatched the book out of his hand, frowning. Erik, however, seemed hardly to notice. He turned to one of the pages that had been strewn around the tent, holding it close to examine, running his hand over the raised print.

“Gorilla,” he repeated, this time almost absent-mindedly, half in thought. He turned to Charles, holding up the paper, pointing to the unknown markings. “Charles?”

Ignoring the bewildered Shaw, Charles bent down, taking the paper from Erik and inching closer. “Letters,” he said, running a hand over the type just as Erik had done. He flapped the paper in the air, turning it over to show the other side, which was blank. “Paper.”

Erik took the page back from Charles, staring at it, brow furrowed. “ _Pay_ -pah,” he said quietly. He turned the page over again. “Lettahs.”

“Are you teaching him words already?” Raven asked from the doorway.

Charles stood up again. “Of course. How else is he supposed to communicate with us?”

“Moira and I were talking and we think he should learn basic sentence structure and greetings first. Anyway, that’s how I learned French,” Raven replied briskly, but she was gentle as she walked forward and touched Erik’s arm. “She’s setting things up in the research tent now. Come on, Erik.”

She held out a hand, nodding at him to take it. Erik did with no hesitation, standing up. She began to lead Erik out through the tent, but he stopped suddenly, watching Charles pick up the textbook pages from the ground and feeling the tug on his arm as Raven was forced to stop as well.

“Charles,” Erik called, holding out his other hand insistently. Charles glanced up, an eyebrow rising at the look on Erik’s face.

Raven paused, looking from Charles to Erik’s outstretched hand for a moment. Slowly, a small smile played across her features. “Yes, come along, Charles,” she coaxed. “You wouldn’t want to miss out on the fun, would you?”

Charles cleared his throat, standing, and shooting Raven an unimpressed look but otherwise ignoring her comment. Erik brandished his hand insistently again, and Charles had no choice but to take it. Seemingly satisfied, Erik turned back to Raven, ready to go. As his sister led the way to the research tent, Charles pretended that he could blame the sudden tingling of his skin on the heat, rather than the gentle curl of Erik’s fingers around his own.


	7. Chapter 7

The progress Erik made was really astounding. Within the first half-hour, he had mastered the concept of different greetings; such as “Hello”, versus, “Good afternoon”, under Moira’s tutelage. He also learned a few question word like “what” and “who”, although those were much more difficult to learn. He was a quick study overall, though. His seemingly easy understanding of English made Charles wonder if maybe there was much more to gorilla communication than the presumed handful of noises that meant variances of danger, anger, fear, and happiness. Erik was teaching Charles and the others just as much as they were teaching him.

Greetings mastered, Charles took over to teach Erik pronouns. These too were grasped quickly, although, Charles realized, Erik had very little else to pair them with since he knew no verbs. He conversed with Moira and Raven for several moments while Erik perused the bookshelves.

“We could teach him basic verbs,” Moira suggested. “Like, you know, ‘speak,’ ‘walk,’ ‘like,’ that sort of thing. They’d at least be helpful to him in our presence.”

“Want,” Raven added. “That’s a good one to know.”

“Charles?” Erik asked suddenly. They all turned to see Erik sheepishly pointing to a book on the shelf with particularly bright binding. “Charles, I pay-pah?”

Raven scrunched up her nose, baffled. “What’s he saying?”

“Paper,” Charles replied, suppressing a grin. “It’s something I taught him earlier. I think he’s catching my accent.”

“That won’t last. You’re outnumbered here three to one, England,” Raven grumbled as Charles crouched down to the shelf with the book Erik was pointing to.

It was one of Raven’s: some popular novel at the time about dashing men and spirited ladies. He plucked it from its place, handing it over. “Book.”

“What book?” Erik asked, looking a little confused at the new name. Gently, Charles took it back.

“Book,” he said, clearly, holding the entire thing up and flipping it around. Cracking the spine, he flipped through all the pages, then closed it up again. “Book.” He opened it, holding up a single page so it stood out from the others. “Paper. Or page.” He smoothed the typeface as he had done in the washroom tent. “Letters. Words.”

Erik nodded, his face smoothing out a little as he began to comprehend. “Book,” he said, taking the book from Charles’ hands again and holding the covers closed, before flipping them open. “Pay-pah. Page.” He ran a finger over the letters and named them quietly. “W-ahds.”

“He sure catches on fast,” Raven remarked, and suddenly Charles was broken out of a revere he didn’t know he’d been in. “Even if his pronunciation is a little off.”

Moira laughed lightly. “He is going to have the oddest accent when he becomes fluent.”

Charles couldn’t help but smile at the thought: Erik fluent in their language, able to communicate with them about his thoughts and feelings. The man was so intelligent, so expressive already. Charles longed to know exactly what it was going on inside his head. Right now he was staring at the book, turning the pages delicately now that he knew not to rip them out. A picture of two women sitting on a park bench, buildings just visible over the trees behind them, had caught his attention. He stared at the drawing wonderingly.

There was so much Charles wanted to share with Erik. There were people like him, and whole new worlds for him to explore. They had several months before the boat would arrive to take them back to London. Charles, Moira, and Raven had set aside the whole summer for research before Oxford started up again in September, and they had only just arrived on the coast about a week earlier. Surely by the time they needed to return back home Erik would be able to communicate almost perfectly with them, understand almost every word they said. He would know about the places he could go now, for a part of Charles was beginning to realize he would take Erik wherever the other man wanted to be, show him whatever he wanted, repay him for all he was teaching them about his world by showing him theirs.

“Do you like the book?” he asked gently, smiling. Erik jerked away from the picture to meet Charles’ gaze. “You like it?”

Praying Erik still remembered his pronoun lesson from earlier and could piece together what he was asking, Charles watched Erik think for a moment before he finally spoke.

“I like book,” he replied unsurely.

Raven and Moira clapped and whooped appreciatively. Charles couldn’t help but laugh happily as well, Erik grinning broadly when he saw how pleased the others were.

“I like book,” he said again, pointing to the picture. “I like words.”

“Oh, that’s a picture,” Charles answered, beaming, and pointing from the drawing to the page on the opposite side which held text. “Picture. Words.”

Erik laughed, excited. “I like picture,” he explained, scooting a little closer to Charles so they could look at the pages together. “I like book. I like...” Not knowing the words, he gestured to the different things depicted; the trees, the winding path, the two women chatting on the bench, a boy flying a kite with his dog, and the tops of the buildings.

“I like, Charles,” Erik said earnestly. He held up his hand, setting the book down so he could take Charles’ wrist and press their hands together has he had done yesterday, looking from Charles to the picture in the book pointedly.

Charles felt his mouth fall open slightly, his throat strangely tight from the expression on the other man’s face. He was so happy, so grateful, and curious Charles felt as if his heart would burst with a new swell of affection. “ _People_ ,” he managed at last. “We’re people, Erik. Humans.”

“Erik people,” Erik breathed, the beginnings of a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. “Charles people.”

Charles nodded, swallowing hard, but smiling back, just the same.

Raven’s voice brought them back to the present. “If he likes that picture so much, think of how much he’ll like the projector.”

“Oh my word, Raven, you’re right!” Charles exclaimed, jumping up abruptly. “It’s next to the chemistry lab, isn’t it, Moira?”

Moira nodded, already rummaging through a box on the other side of the tent that was resting next to a table covered in test tubes and Bunsen burners. Just a few moments later she emerged, holding the projector over her head triumphantly. Charles rushed over to help her set it up, and Raven followed, gesturing for Erik to come over as well. Erik picked up the book from the floor and followed, watching the activity with curiosity.

While the others were busy with finding the slides, Charles took a white sheet out from the same box that had held the projector, going to the far side of the tent, which was covered with more bookshelves, and trying to hang it up as a makeshift screen. He struggled for a moment on tiptoe. Really, these shelves were much taller than they seemed. He jumped, attempting to hook the sheet somewhere far enough back that it would stay, but it was no use. It fluttered down after every attempt to fasten it. He was almost ready to give up and ask Raven to take his place- she was a few inches taller than him in her shoes- when a warm hand suddenly appeared in the small of his back.

“Charles,” Erik said, the slightest hint of amusement in his voice as he easily reached up and draped the edge of the sheet far back on the bookshelf, securing it with the book he still held in his hand.

Charles tried not to gape. “Oh, well,” he spluttered, “very… very good thinking, Erik. Good.”

Erik quirked an eyebrow at Charles as he did up the other end, stealing another book from one of the shelves. “You like, Charles?” he asked, rather cheekily.

Charles narrowed his eyes, scowling. “Yes, Erik, it’s terribly ingenious,” he replied, voice dripping with sarcasm, but even Erik could tell there was no real bite to his words. The smirk he gave Charles was infuriating and, Charles told himself resolutely, not at all the handsomest thing he had ever seen.

“If this is how you are with a ten word vocabulary I think I might reconsider my attitude towards your education,” he grumbled, and although he couldn’t understand him, Erik let out a bark of laughter in response, much to Charles’ surprise.

“Hey!” Moira called, before Charles could retaliate. “Everything’s set up. Come over here so you can see.”

Despite himself, Charles grinned back at Erik, clapping him on the back to signal for him to follow as he made his way back to the others. “Here,” he said, patting an armchair Raven had dragged over so Erik could sit and watch the slides more easily.

Erik leapt up onto the cushion obligingly, only to almost fall off it a second later when the first image flickered into life. It was another image of a park, this time with three young men sailing on a lake, a couple having a picnic underneath a tree, and a mother duck and her ducklings waddling towards a thicket of rushes. Raven and Moira must have picked it because of Erik’s fascination in the picture in the book.

For a moment Erik sat completely still, gaping at the projection against the bookcases as the others watched him affectionately. After he seemed to gain his composure, Erik stepped down from where he had been crouched in the armchair, creeping cautiously forward to inspect the picture more closely. As soon as he crossed in front of the path of the light, however, his own shadow blocked out the couple eating underneath the tree, and he jumped back in surprise.

He turned to look back at the others, frowning. “What?”

Charles chuckled, dropping a hand in front of the projector’s opening and completely blocking the picture, before he pulled his hand away again, slowly, so Erik could better understand. He seemed to have grasped it, raising his eyebrows knowingly, and backing away from the cone of light issuing from the projector so as not to block the picture again. Charles smiled and nodded at him.

Erik loved examining the different slides, gasping whenever he saw a new one projected onto the screen. The others tried to name off the things in the pictures as Erik pointed to them- a house, a dog, a ladder, a cake- expanding his vocabulary so quickly Charles doubted he would remember it all when he came back.

And he would come back, wouldn’t he? Erik certainly seemed to love learning the new words and things from this human world. But Erik also had family in the jungle. After the obvious display of aggression from the silverback yesterday, Erik must be in some sort of trouble. Were his friends- the one Charles had seen him talking to in the camp- were they worried about him? Did they know where he was? Was the whole troop going to come looking for him?

But no, Charles thought. Erik was a full-grown man. Surely the gorillas in his family recognized that, even if he was a different species than them. Erik had proved he was perfectly able of taking care of himself yesterday with the leopard. Of course the other gorillas wouldn’t be too worried about him. He probably spent most of the time away from his troop with the other mostly-grown male gorillas. Silently, Charles scolded himself. Erik was here because he wanted to be. Ignoring the anger of the silverback yesterday had to be proof that Erik would return tomorrow as well. Or did it mean he would _stay?_ He watched as Moira named a motorcar for Erik, a light smile playing at his lips. God, he hoped Erik would stay.

Just then, they were interrupted by Shaw, throwing open the flap of the tent, and letting in enough light that the projection of the motorcar faded. “I hate to break up the study party,” he said, not sounding very sorry at all, “but is the ape-man joining us for dinner?”

“Oh.” Charles had only begun to wonder himself. “Well… I suppose, if he wants to.”

Erik had turned around as soon as Shaw entered the tent to glare at him for ruining the screen, but when he saw Charles regarding him questioningly, he perked up.

“Do you want to eat with us?” Charles asked, miming bringing food to his mouth and chewing. “Eat?”

Erik’s face brightened, and he got up from his seat on the rug next to the projector’s stand, mimicking Charles’ movements. “Eat, yes?”

“Good, yes,” Charles answered with a grin.

Good lord, Erik was catching on quickly. They hadn’t told him explicitly what “yes” meant, although they had been repeating it over and over when he did something correctly; he must have recognized its meaning for himself. Charles wondered, as he, Erik, Raven, and Moira all made their way out of the tent and over to the table which Shaw had already set, if Erik was beginning to understand more than he actually let on.

While Moira, Raven, and Shaw all sat as soon as they reached the table, Erik waited for Charles to take a seat before scrambling up onto the empty chair beside him.

Moira quirked an eyebrow. “Well, that was surprisingly gentlemanly,” she remarked, barely concealing the upturn of her lips. “Although it really shouldn’t have been you he was waiting for, if we’re being technical.”

“Moira’s right though,” Raven added, stabbing a grilled fish from the plate in the center of the table. “Erik seems to be particularly attached to you, Charles.”

Charles paused, using the excuse of heaping both his and Erik’s plates with fish, fruit salad, bread, and canned green beans to explain away his silence as he thought. “I suppose it’s because I’m the first human he ever saw,” he said finally. “As such we share a… special bond.”

“I don’t suppose you could use this bond to help us find the gorillas?” Shaw asked rather pointedly, carving his fish with militaristic efficiently.

“All in good time,” Charles replied, smiling wanly. “We still have three whole months left in this expedition. Who knows, we might even find one without Erik’s help.”

Shaw seemed ready to argue, but Charles’ attention was immediately drawn away when Erik placed a tentative hand on his arm.

“Charles?” he asked, eyeing the plate and looking suddenly terribly upset. He pointed to the cooked fish, still completely whole, and staring at him.

The fish was very obviously dead, and while Erik of course knew about death- animals were killed and eaten in the jungle every day, mostly by leopards and other jungle cats- _he_ had never actually eaten anything dead before. It seemed wrong. But Charles and the others obviously intended to eat the dead fish. Nothing Charles had shown him was bad so far, and besides that, Erik knew somehow that Charles could never hurt anything. Not intentionally anyway. Still, Erik couldn’t stand the way the fish was still staring unseeingly up at him. It made him feel guilty, even though he knew he hadn’t done anything wrong.

He tugged at Charles’ arm again, pulling him closer so he had to move his chair towards Erik’s. “Charles,” he said, trying to put all his feelings- confusion, apology, distress- into that one word.

It seemed to work, because Charles looked from Erik to the fish, a second passing before he realized what was the matter. “Oh, Erik!” he cried, eyes widening. “Oh dear, I’m so sorry. That was terribly stupid of me- of course you don’t want to eat it, you’ve been living with vegetarians for God knows how long. Oh dear, I’m so sorry, please forgive me. Let me get that out of your way.”

Although Erik couldn’t understand any of what Charles had said, the other man must have understood what he wanted, because he immediately picked up some of the odd instruments the others around the table were using and transferred Erik’s fish and his own back to the plate in the middle. He said something else to the others, motioning for them to do the same. Raven and Moira nodded, shooting Erik sympathetic looks as they loaded their fish back onto the plate as well.

Shaw, on the other hand, didn’t move. He only smiled. He had already picked the meat from half of the carcass. The sight made Erik slightly sick, especially when paired with that awful, smug look on his face. He looked like a jungle cat, confident and cruel, face bloodied from a recent kill.

Charles was frowning at him, opening his mouth and looking ready to order him to stop eating, but Erik stopped him again with a touch. He shook his head the way he’d seen the others do all day when he’d done something they didn’t like.

“Charles,” he said again, staring into those bright blue eyes as if by doing so he could speak into the other man’s mind.

The anger on Charles’ face melted away, his eyes growing soft as a slight smile tugged at the corners of his red, red lips. “Okay,” he said. “As long as you’re happy.”

Erik sat back, answering Charles’ smile as best he could, but Charles still moved the plate away into a tent close by before joining them back at the table.


	8. Chapter 8

Dinner with Erik had been surprisingly smooth after the fish fiasco. He was quick to pick up the concept of silverware, although he obviously preferred to use his hands, and Charles wasn’t too concerned with keeping him from doing so. They weren’t there to change Erik completely, just introduce him to their way of life.

While Charles helped Erik, Raven and Moira tried to engage Shaw in conversation, but he seemed only minimally interested in the amazing bounds Erik had made in speech. He was much more concerned as to whether he had given any indication of where the gorillas nested.

“We’re not really concerned with that yet I don’t think,” Moira finally said after the third time he’d dropped hints on the subject, just as Raven had started clearing away dishes. “As Charles said, there’s plenty of time. And Erik has just as much to teach us as we have to teach him.”

“Of course, of course,” Shaw replied genially. “I’m merely concerned that we’ll get side-tracked with all this excitement. You did hire me to help you find the gorillas after all. I’d like you to get what you paid for.”

‘That’s very kind of you,” Moira said, smiling lightly and standing. “I’m sure we’ll find time, even with our new discovery.” The smile she flashed to Charles as she left for the washroom tent was much more genuine.

He returned it quickly before turning his attention back on Erik, who was helping him clear the table. They had a rotation for chores; whoever’s turn it was to cook the next meal would clean the last meal’s dishes. This allowed them to cycle through each meal without one person ever having to cook too many big suppers or continually wake up earlier than everyone to start on breakfast. Since Raven was due to cook the next morning, she was already scrubbing away at the Dutch oven and serving bowls Shaw had used that evening.

“This is the last of it,” Charles said, setting his and Shaw’s plates down with a soft clank next to the tin washtub as Erik followed suit with his and Moira’s.

Raven smiled. “Thanks, Charles. Do you think Erik will be staying around for a bit longer?”

He considered for a moment, watching Erik lean over Raven’s shoulder to examine the water in the basin. “I don’t know when he’ll decide to go. He certainly knows he isn’t chained here. I was thinking we’d try the projections again if he seemed up for it. Or maybe we could go into the jungle just a little bit. I could teach him our words for plants. Honestly, though, I’d be thrilled if he decided not to leave at all,” he admitted with a small laugh.

“He is quite fascinating,” Raven agreed as Erik sniffed at the water, cocking his head as he pondered the silky sheen of soap. “I’d best say goodnight to him anyway. I think I’ll turn in after these are done. It’s been a long day.”

She withdrew her hands from the soapy water, wiping them on her skirts before turning to Erik, smiling warmly. “If you’re going off with Charles I suppose I’ll say goodnight,” she said, holding out a hand for him to shake. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Erik.”

“Goodnight,” Erik answered, recognizing the word for what it was, although instead of shaking Raven’s right hand, he merely held it in his left for a moment before letting go.

Raven laughed. “Okay then. Goodnight, Charles.”

“Goodnight,” Charles answered, kissing her lightly on the cheek.

Erik watched the exchange, a slight furrow creasing his brow, and Charles realized that he probably didn’t understand the concept of kissing, let alone that the gesture could be friendly and non-sexual as well as heated and purposeful. After a moment, he seemed to dismiss what he’d seen, and Charles thankfully followed him towards the research tent.

Charles expected they would be looking at more slides, and while Erik did toss a look of interest towards the projector as soon as he stepped inside, he instead walked towards the bookshelf. Waiting for Charles to nod permission, Erik took a book, seemingly at random, and set it down on the ground so he could stretch out while he languidly turned the pages.

“You’re a bookworm already, Erik,” Charles remarked with a slow smile. “I’m so proud.”

“I like book,” Erik replied without looking up.

The volume he had chosen was about the African rainforest, the pictures inside depicting colorless scenes Erik had probably come across- Colobus monkeys swinging from vines, an African golden cat perched on a rock, a chameleon eyeing a dragonfly. While it was true that Erik went much more quickly through the pictures, probably because the sights were so familiar, he still examined each one before flipping the page. Charles wondered if maybe Erik had never really looked too hard at the rainforest since he’d lived there apparently all of his life. To him, the rainforest was home; not something to be marvelled at, but something he knew like the back of his hand, even though it changed every day.

Charles’ stomach flipped at the thought. Being that connected to something as vast and full of life as the rainforest was exhilarating, even if he was really only experiencing it as an outsider. Any true connection he might make be able to make here would be through what Erik chose to teach him. Suddenly, Charles wanted to reach out, to say something- even though Erik probably wouldn’t understand it- about how amazing Charles thought he was; how much Charles wanted to know of his life here, and how he interacted with his family. Did one of the female gorillas watch over him? Had she been watching over him his whole life? He had gone so far as to open his mouth, hand outstretched towards Erik’s shoulder when Erik turned a page to reveal a roaring silverback.

Immediately he jerked away, closing the book hurriedly and sitting up. Charles faltered. The soft moment had passed, and Erik was now sitting tensed, worry furrowing his brow, a finger tapping a nervous rhythm against his knee as he stared at the closed book, thinking.

Charles cleared his suddenly dry throat. “Are… are you all right?” he asked tentatively.

Erik jerked around, and as soon as he registered Charles watching him, some of the darkness went out of his eyes. “I… I…” he struggled, shifting so he was face-to-face with Charles, so close Charles could feel the heat radiating from him. Finally, after a moment of thinking, he continued. “I,” he said, making a walking motion with his fingers that seemed to mean leaving.

“Go,” Charles supplied, his heart sinking. “You have to go.”

The other man nodded, but he didn’t smile even though Charles had understood. “Yes. I…”

“Have to go,” Charles said again, more slowly this time, always teaching.

“Have to go,” Erik agreed. “I have to go.” He pointed back at the book in explanation, and Charles nodded, managing a smile.

“Your family will probably be missing you,” he said, standing and holding out a hand to help Erik to his feet as well. “Come on, I’ll walk you out.”

They exited the tent together, Erik’s lankier form slinking slightly behind Charles. He made almost no sound as he padded across the ground; Charles wouldn’t have known he was being followed if it wasn’t for his acute awareness of Erik’s warmth so close behind him. Erik certainly could have left from anywhere in the clearing and gotten back home easily, but Charles automatically made his way to the far side of the camp where Erik had entered from that afternoon. He stopped just short of the tree line, Erik coming up to his side so they were almost brushing shoulders as they looked into the darkness of the jungle.

“Well,” Charles said, smiling as brightly as he could for the worry knotting his stomach. “I suppose this is goodnight, then.”

Erik tipped his head in acknowledgement. “Goodnight,” he echoed, but he didn’t make any movement towards the jungle.

Here, far away from the circle of light cast by the lanterns outside the washroom and research tents, Erik’s face was inscrutable. If he couldn’t feel the heat of the other man’s gaze, Charles wouldn’t know if Erik was even looking at him. Nervously, he cleared his throat, holding out a hand for Erik to shake, but just like he’d done with Raven, he took Charles’ hand in his own, gripping it soft and warm.

Charles barely suppressed the shudder that threatened to run up his spine, breaking out in gooseflesh despite the warmth of the night. Erik’s hand was rough, callused from a life of climbing and foraging, but it was also strong; the fingers long and dexterous. Charles willed his face to remain neutral, even as his pulse raced, should Erik somehow be able to catch his expression in a stray beam of light. Erik’s moved so he was holding Charles’ hand with both of his own, and then, with a small tug, Charles stepped forward, Erik’s face swimming into focus as his eyes adjusted. He brought his hand up to Erik’s shoulder automatically, grounding himself, however faintly, to reality.

_He’s just studying me_ , Charles thought desperately, refusing to back down or lower his eyes under Erik’s careful scrutiny. _He does this all the time._

Slowly, Charles could feel their bodies drifting closer and closer, until he almost had to cross his eyes to keep them fixed on Erik’s. Erik’s eyelids drooped, and Charles, heart still hammering, took a breath, bracing himself for the brush of Erik’s lips, their breath mingling hot in the inch between them. And suddenly Erik was veering, Charles’ eyes snapping open again as the other man’s lips gently brushed his cheek.

 

His breath whooshed out in a startled laugh as Erik pulled away, a coy smile flashing briefly in the darkness. Tension he didn’t know he’d been holding in his shoulders melted away at the sight, making him laugh again, feeling almost as hysterical as he had when they’d first met.

“Well, Erik,” he finally managed, biting his lip to suppress more chuckles, “you certainly keep me on my toes.”

Erik grinned again, looking rather pleased with himself, but he still didn’t relinquish Charles’ hand. Not that Charles was complaining. He fancied he could have stood there with Erik all night, simply holding hands and enjoying each other’s company. It was a rather disarming thought.

Charles had known from a very young age that he hadn’t been like most of his male peers- uninterested in the pictures of pin-up girls hidden from the maids who cleaned the dormitories of the boarding school he’d been sent to shortly after his father died and his mother re-married Kurt. He’d also learned very quickly that acting upon the impulses he _did_ have would probably land him in more trouble than they were worth.

It wasn’t until he’d left boarding school for Oxford- taking Raven with him by the sheer luck that Kurt couldn’t be bothered to fight him with the legalities of the whole thing- that Charles had kissed another man. That whole experience, while seminal, had been rather underwhelming in hindsight. Charles had only been with Thomas a handful of times until he decided to break it off, making the excuse that his studies were too time consuming for such a covert relationship.

And while a few men had caught his eye since then, Charles had never gone further than furtive trysts in dark, private places. Erik, though… Erik was completely different than anything Charles had ever felt before. He forgot himself when Erik was around, wanting to reach out and make connections, not caring if other people could see them, merely wanting Erik to know that Charles wondered at and appreciated him just as much as Erik seemed to. Even though they could barely communicate, Charles felt a connection to Erik, a similar earnestness in the way Erik learned to the way Charles taught. They understood one another, even without completely comprehending what the other was saying. 

“Charles,” Erik said quietly, breaking the other man out of his musings.

He shook himself slightly, pulling back just the slightest bit when he realized he’d been leaning in towards Erik’s warm chest. “Hmm?”

Erik looked at him pointedly, raising an eyebrow, but when Charles merely looked blankly back at him, Erik rolled his eyes, half-exasperated, half-fond. He moved one of his hands, which had still been clasped around Charles’, to point at his cheek. “Goodnight, Charles,” he said, smoothly, confidently, as if there was nothing at all odd about what he was requesting.

Charles warred with himself, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth for a moment before deciding, really, what was the harm? He spared a second to flick his eyes towards the gathering of tents to make sure no one was watching, before standing slightly on tiptoe as Erik leaned down to meet him. His lips brushed dryly against Erik’s cheek, chaste and simple, but the action still sent a jolt of electricity through Charles’ whole body, nerves sparking even in his fingers and toes.

“Goodnight, Erik,” he murmured, trying to keep the rough edge out of his voice. Erik stepped away, releasing Charles’ hand and tossing him a final smile before stepping into the jungle. Before he could stop himself, Charles was calling out, “You’ll come again tomorrow, won’t you?”

Erik looked at him blankly, so Charles asked again, waving his hands through the air as if mimicking the sun and hoping Erik got the message. He must have, because he was smiling again, nodding. “Yes. Good morning, Charles,” he said, which Charles understood perfectly, despite the awkwardness of it, that Erik would be returning as soon as he could.

He grinned back at Erik, raising a hand in farewell, and then Erik turned, crouching onto all fours and sprinting off through the underbrush. Even after his figure was completely out of sight, Charles waited several moments, staring into the emptiness, before turning back to his own tent, feeling rather light-headed.

~

Wind whipped through Erik’s hair as he swung from vine to vine through the blackness, back towards home. He had stopped in to see everyone for breakfast that morning, wanting to assure his mother he was alright, but they had barely exchanged words, the tension and betrayal between them still palpable even after a night apart.

A part of him ached to know that he’d hurt his mother, and probably worried her even more after an entire day away, despite the fact that he often was out without checking up until nightfall. She and the others were still frightened by Logan’s words. They feared the humans, even when it was now obvious one of them had been in their troop for almost twenty-five years.

Erik gritted his teeth, pushing such thoughts away. So what if many of the troop were probably now wary of him, expecting him to join the others and strike? Whether they liked it or not, Erik was still part of the family, and he would never turn against them. The newcomers- the humans- were wonderful and kind, but they still didn’t know the rejection he’d felt before they came. Only his mother would ever fully understand that, and for that, he loved her more than anyone else he’d ever known.

Although, he thought, a small smile spreading across his face, he was quickly starting to become attached to the humans as well: Raven, who was sharp and playful, and happily welcomed Erik into their troop; Moira, who taught Erik with a sweet, knowing smile twitching at the corners of her mouth, patient and calm. And then there was Charles; Charles who was brilliant, and gentle, and never pushed Erik to uncomfortable limits, who understood that Erik was there to learn, not to be changed. Charles’ lips were so red from being bitten that they looked like he’d smeared them with juice from berries. His eyes were bluer than the sky, than the clear water of the pool beneath the waterfall. Thinking of Charles, Erik almost felt regretful of having to go back to his troop.

He dropped to the ground several yards away from his mother’s nest, creeping up slowly so as not to wake her. Her brow was slightly furrowed as she slept, the tiniest downturn to her mouth that was unnatural to see when she was awake. Once again, Erik felt an acute stab of shame for having worried her. He crouched down and curled up beside her as he normally did, her chest rising and falling gently.

He sighed. Leading this double-life was not going to be easy for anyone involved, but he could do it. He had to. Here, curled up next to his mother, he felt safe, warm, and secure, the soft sounds of the sleeping troop and the creeping nocturnal animals washing over him. Tomorrow he would sneak off and return to Charles and the others; nothing could stop him from doing so. But before he did, he would bring his mother the best bananas he could find as a peace offering. He could negotiate being from two different worlds… he just had to keep what he was doing from Logan and everything- and everybody- would be fine.

Finally, Erik’s brain, which had been buzzing since that afternoon with all the new things he’d been learning, started to calm. His last thought as he drifted off was of the brightness in Charles’ eyes he’d seen all day, encouraging and understanding; the most breathtaking thing Erik had ever seen in his life.


	9. Chapter 9

Erik returned to the encampment the next day, and the next, and the next, until before they knew it a month had passed. Erik’s English continued to improve steadily, much faster than Charles or Moira had ever hoped it would. Although his sentence structure still wasn’t perfect, he could now often state his feelings towards the things they were teaching him, and voice when he was confused about something.

Today, in turn, he had shown Charles, Moira, Raven, and Shaw around the jungle, pointing out where they could find some of the ripest fruit. He had also offered to show them how to swing on vines, but although Moira and Raven had seemed intrigued, Charles had instantly looked panicked at the thought, so they had opted to go back to the camp instead.

When they reached the tents again, Moira excused herself to start preparing dinner, carrying an armful of bananas and mangos with her. Shaw also disappeared, apparently still silently fuming that Erik hadn’t led them to the gorillas. He had inquired about them during their exploration that afternoon, but Erik had been too excited to answer, tugging at Charles’ arm and pulling him this way and that to point out plants or flowers or insects.

Charles couldn’t for the life of him understand Shaw’s obsession with finding the nesting area. Of course he wanted to find the gorillas too, but that was because of his research. Shaw wasn’t a scientist at all; he was essentially a guide and a bodyguard. There was nothing he could stand to gain by finding the gorillas. Something about the situation made Charles uneasy, but he forced the thought out of his mind, turning his attention back to Erik, who he noticed was staring at him.

“What?” he asked. They were sitting in armchairs in the research tent, the door tied open to allow a slow breeze to drift through.

Erik closed the book about planets he had been browsing through. “Your hair,” he said, reaching out to curl a strand of it around his finger briefly.

Charles was quickly becoming used to little touches Erik would give to him, but it still made him feel stupid afterwards when he had to reply and his tongue felt too big and slow for his mouth. Luckily, Erik didn’t discriminate whom he poked and prodded- except Shaw, who he avoided whenever he could- so Raven and Moira were used to being touched as well. Charles just hoped they didn’t realize how much more Erik seemed to do it to him.

“What about my hair?” he asked, keeping his voice light even as he shuffled the notes he had been going over a little nervously.

“You and Shaw have tiny hair,” Erik explained, “and Raven and Moira have big hair.”

“Short and long you mean?”

“You and Shaw have short hair, and Raven and Moira have long?”

“Yes,” Charles answered, sitting up a little straighter and wondering where Erik was going with this.

Erik processed the new words for a moment, then frowned. “But I have long hair too.”

“Yes you do,” Charles said sagely. “It’s okay to have long hair, just as long as you keep it as clean as you normally do.”

“No,” Erik replied quickly, shaking his head. “No. I don’t like it. It…” he broke off, waving his hands in front of his face. “When I swing on vines or run. I cannot see.”

“Oh,” Charles sat back, surprised. “You don’t want long hair?”

Erik shook his head again. “No.”

“Well, I mean, I can get Raven to cut it for you if you like,” Charles began slowly. “Then you would have short hair, like mine and Shaw’s, and it wouldn’t get in your way.”

“I want short hair,” Erik affirmed immediately, already getting up and heading towards the open door. “Raven?”

“I think she’s just outside,” Charles called over his shoulder at Erik’s retreating back, scrambling to gather up all his papers and put them back into some sort of order before following out of the tent.

When Charles found Raven and Erik they were already in the washroom tent, Erik perched patiently atop the stool in front of the vanity while Raven scrutinized his head, walking around him in a circle and tapping the scissors gently against her cheek as she thought. She nodded a quick greeting to Charles when he entered, but otherwise remained silent for another long moment.

“Okay,” she said at last. “Since your hair is all kind of twisted together there’s no way I can leave it as long as Charles’. I’m going to have to cut as close to your head as possible.” She demonstrated, holding the scissors close against her own head and making snipping motions, careful not to get any of her hair caught between the blades.

Erik nodded, looking the slightest bit exasperated that it was taking so long. “Yes. It’s okay. I _want_ short hair,” he said insistently, and Raven raised her eyebrows.

“Alright, then, Erik. We’ll get started,” she said, setting a hand on his shoulder to remind him to stay still before bringing the scissors up and cutting off a large clump of hair by his right temple.

Erik stayed very still the entire time, not even flinching a bit when Raven brought the blades dangerously close to his ears, even though the snipping sound made him nervous. Raven worked quickly and efficiently cutting his hair so short it felt like it wasn’t even there. By the time she finished, he felt considerably lighter, and even cleaner. Gradually, the snipping noises started to become fewer and more spaced out. Finally, she passed in front of him one last time, looking to either side of his head and seeming to size them up before backing away and nodding.

“You’re done,” she announced, smiling and moving out of the way so he could see himself in the mirror.

As soon as he caught his reflection his jaw dropped. His hair was cut extremely close to his head, so much so it looked almost more like fuzz than hair. The look wasn’t terrible though, in fact, he found he rather liked being able to see his own face without having to tuck unruly dreadlocks behind his ears. Cautiously, he ran both hands over his head, turning to the side to see as much of it as he could, a slow smile spreading across his face.

“Do you like it?” Raven asked, crossing her arms and smiling back at him.

Erik’s grin widened. “I like it,” he answered. “Thank you, Raven. Short hair is good.”

Raven laughed. “Well, if you ever need me to cut it again, I’d be happy to do it. Just let me know.”

“Yes,” Erik said, slightly distracted once he noticed Charles watching him in the mirror from just inside the door. “I will. Thank you.”

“No problem,” she said, setting down the scissors and patting his arm amiably. “I’m gonna go wash up for dinner. Charles, you can clean up this mess since you just stood there the whole time.”

She bumped Charles’ shoulder on the way out, forcing the corners of his mouth to twitch at the affectionate gesture, but when she was gone, a somewhat tense silence settled over the tent. Erik watched Charles step tentatively forward in the mirror until he could feel the other man’s closeness against his back.

“It looks very nice, Erik,” Charles said quietly, daring to reach up and run a hand quickly over Erik’s head. He blushed. “It’s… rather soft actually,” he added, dropping his hand away just as promptly as he had raised it.

Erik lamented the loss of contact; Charles always seemed to want to touch him more than he actually did, and Erik wondered why he held back so much. Certainly he must have noticed how much Erik liked touching him, even if they were soft, barely there brushes of his hand against Charles’ arm or back. Still, he recognized the approval in Charles’ tone, and felt a little lighter for it despite himself.

“Now I can see all the time,” he remarked. “I will be much better at running and swinging, and then you won’t be afraid to swing with me again.”

Charles laughed at that, his eyes sparkling and making Erik’s heart clench not unpleasantly. “Oh, is that what this is about?” he asked. “I suppose if you’re that adamant about it I might have another go. Maybe. But not tonight. Here, help me clean up.”

By the time the tent was spotless again, Moira was calling them to dinner. They hastened to wash their hands- a habit Charles had been insistent Erik pick up, at least when he ate with them- and then they were sitting at the table, heaping their plates with everything except the salted pork. Raven and Moira had gone back to eating as much meat as they liked when Erik had been able to communicate that he didn’t mind if they ate it, he just didn’t think he could, but Charles had silently continued to share his vegetarian diet. While everyone else must have noticed by now, they didn’t comment.

Conversation inevitably turned to Erik’s new haircut. Moira thought it looked, “Very sophisticated,” and agreed that it would probably be much easier for Erik to see where he was going now that his hair wouldn’t be flying in his face.

“Charles is going to learn how to swing with us now,” Erik piped up a little smugly, making Charles choke on his mouthful of rice.

“Is he now?” Raven asked, grinning and clapping her brother on the back as she grinned knowingly at Moira.

“I said _maybe_ ,” Charles spluttered, shrugging off Raven’s hand and glaring at both women, which only served to make them smile wider. “ _Maybe_ , Erik.”

“You said not tonight,” Erik returned, trying to nonchalantly sip his water, although it did little to hide the slight quirk to his mouth. “Tomorrow, then. I do not know this ‘maybe’.”

“Oh you know ‘maybe’ perfectly well,” Charles shot back. He crossed his arms, frowning at Erik, but the other man didn’t seem to be affected by his ire in the least. Instead, he shrugged and made a vague grunting noise before scooping more turnips onto his plate.

It was Charles’ turn to cook in the morning, so he ate quickly and left the table early, going to fill the tin washbasin in the nearby stream where they got their water. Everyone else was just finishing up when he got back. He took the plates that were empty and began to soak them, the others bringing the last of the dishes and then retreating to the research tent. Charles washed mechanically, his mind wandering.

First his mind drifted to Erik as it had almost every free moment since they’d first met. He grinned to himself, feeling a little giddy and a little foolish as well, remembering the brightness of Erik’s features as he showed his world to Charles, the way his hand had occasionally dipped to the small of Charles’ back as he guided him through the dense underbrush.

But suddenly he remembered a glimpse he’d seen of Shaw’s face as they made their way through the jungle. It was an expression he’d never seen on the man’s face before, calculating, and colder than anyone should look while taking a pleasant stroll. If Charles didn’t know better, he’d say Shaw almost looked greedy. The thought made him suddenly cold. He dismissed it to the back of his mind as quickly as he could, but he did not forget it entirely. Shaw had come very highly recommended with shining credentials, but he was also a stranger. Charles always tried to see the best in people, but he could now admit to himself there was something off about Shaw. He would have to be more wary of him from now on.

With the dishes clean and dried and put back in their proper places, Charles made his way into the research tent. Raven, Moira, and Shaw were all clustered around a small table they’d pulled to the center of the room, playing what appeared to be poker with marked pieces of paper instead of chips. Against the wall of the tent, Erik was sitting in the same armchair from that afternoon, reading his book on the planets. Or looking at it, rather. Erik could read a few words, but certainly not enough to understand the text in front of him. As Charles made his way over, he looked up and smiled.

“Still enjoying your book then?” Charles asked, sinking back down into his own seat.

“I like it very much,” Erik answered, nodding. “I like the pictures. Moira said they are planets that are in the sky, like Earth is a planet.”

“Exactly,” Charles replied. “And Earth and all the other planets rotate around the sun, which is a star.”

Erik seemed to consider this for a moment. “If we can see the sun and the stars, can we see other planets too?”

“We can!” Charles answered, sitting up straighter and grinning. “That’s a brilliant question, Erik. We can see them quite well at night, in fact, with a telescope. Would you like to try? It’s dark enough.”

“Yes.” Erik grinned, getting up from the chair and following Charles to the southwest corner of the tent where the telescope was standing, covered by a sheet.

Charles pulled the covering off, Erik raising his eyebrows when he saw the new contraption. Grabbing the long wooden legs, Charles hefted the telescope over his shoulder and started towards the door.

“Are you two stargazing?” Raven called, not moving to get up. “Be careful out there!”

“We will!” Charles shouted back. Shaw had warned them all when they started the expedition not to wander off at night, but Erik knew the jungle like the back of his hand. They would be perfectly safe.

They made their way towards the beach, not a five-minute walk away from camp, where the sky would be the most open. A full moon illuminated their path the whole way, not a cloud blocking its light. That was good; Erik had picked a perfect night to become interested in astronomy. They walked in a companionable silence that wasn’t broken until Charles set the telescope down, gently kicking at the legs apart, and swivelling the lens until it was pointing towards the one planet he could pick out almost anywhere.

“This is Mars,” he said, standing back once he’d found it and holding the stem of the telescope steady so Erik could step up and look. “It’s smaller than Earth, but astrophysicists say it’s made up of the same kinds of metals and rocks.”

“Metals like those in the silverware?” Erik asked, his eye still attached to the telescope.

“Yes, technically,” Charles answered. “And like the iron in your blood. You’re made of star-stuff, Erik.”

“That is amazing,” Erik breathed.

Charles smiled. He let Erik look his fill at Mars before turning to Orion so Erik could see the belt closer up, explaining the story of Orion and the giant scorpion. After a while, Erik pulled away from the telescope so he could point to random stars and ask Charles about them. Unfortunately, Charles was not very learned on the subject besides what he’d already told Erik, so without a book, he was a bit useless.

“I’m sorry, Erik,” Charles said finally, after the fifth time Erik had asked about a group of stars he couldn’t identify. He sunk to the sand in a sitting position. “I really have told you all I know. Since you’re so interested, maybe we can read that book together tomorrow.” Leaning back, he back pulled off his shoes and socks and threw them gently to the side so that the tiny grains could filter between his toes.

A second later, Erik was hovering over him, his head tilted to the side and an eyebrow cocked in amusement. Charles smiled back at him, grabbing his arm and tugging him down so they were lying next to each other in the sand, their arms close enough they were almost brushing.

“Here, look at them like this,” Charles said softly, sweeping his hands across the sky. “Millions of tiny sparks of light. Like fireflies.”

“What are fireflies?” Erik asked, and Charles chuckled quietly.

“They’re bugs, like flies, except they come out at night and their backsides light up like fire.”

“Oh.”

Silence fell once more, Charles content to simply gaze upwards, enjoying the warmth radiating from Erik at his side. He had apparently almost started dozing, because he jumped slightly when Erik spoke up several moments later.

“I’m sorry for what I said at dinner,” he said quietly, reaching out to touch Charles’ forearm tentatively.

Charles turned slightly to his side to better look at Erik. “What?”

“I thought I upset you at dinner when I spoke of teaching you how to swing from the vines,” he said. “If you are afraid, I won’t make you do it. I will just teach Moira and Raven.”

“Oh, Erik,” Charles began, cutting himself off and biting his lip as he thought. “I’m not upset, I promise. If it’s so important to you, I’d like to learn. It makes me nervous… but I think it would also make you happy.”

The smile Erik gave him had the barest upturn of lip, but the look in his eye showed just how pleased he was. “Yes,” he said, the hand still on Charles’ arm tightening just slightly. “Vine swinging is good. You will like it soon, I promise.”

Charles’ heart was thumping once again, a common occurrence whenever they were alone and Erik’s voice was soft and happy, his body a warm, solid weight next to Charles’. He was sure Erik could feel his pulse jumping in anticipation, even when he knew there was probably nothing to get excited about. For all the times they’d shared an intimate look or gesture and all they’d been alone, Erik had never made any real indication of his feelings towards Charles. He’d never said anything or kissed him.

Well, that part wasn’t quite true, of course. Apart from the first night there had been a handful of instances where, when they’d said goodnight, Erik had insisted on kissing Charles’ cheek and Charles reciprocating. Sometimes he was too late in leaving the camp to bother with such a formality, hurrying to get home because he said he didn’t want to worry his mother, or sometimes the others would walk him to the edge clearing he always left through and he and Charles would be unable to say goodnight quietly, or other times he just seemed to deem the moment improper for a kiss, but ten times in the past month he had whispered “goodnight” gently in Charles’ ear, pressing a soft kiss to his skin. Not that Charles was counting, of course.

Taking a deep breath, Charles smiled at Erik before slipping out of his grip and moving to stand. “Come on,” he said, reaching down to help Erik to his feet. “It’s getting late and I have to wake up early tomorrow. We should get back.”

He gathered up the telescope again and led the way back to the path, but as soon as he reached the tree line, Erik held him by the arm.

“I will leave now. There is a fast way back down that way.” He nodded towards a small opening in the trees a bit to the west. “Goodnight, Charles,” he murmured, and then he brought his hand up, cupping Charles’ cheek.

For one, exhilarating moment, Charles was sure he was going to lean down and kiss him. But then, he was letting go of Charles completely, stepping away, a small smile touching his lips.

“Oh, um, goodnight then, Erik,” Charles replied lamely, trying not to let his disappointment show on his face. He stood watching for a moment as Erik took off towards the other path, ignoring the uncomfortable weightless feeling of his insides before turning and striding off on his own back towards the tents.

~

“Hey, Erik. Long time no- WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR?”

Erik froze, just outside the gathering of nests with their sleeping occupants. He set his jaw, glaring as he turned and saw Alex, Sean, Armando, and Hank hidden behind a thick grouping of Kapok trees, poking their heads cautiously around the side so as not to get stabbed by any of the thorns. They looked completely dumbstruck.

“Will you keep it down?” he hissed. “You’ll wake the whole damn troop.”

“What happened to your hair?” Alex repeated in a whisper, coming closer and staring at Erik as if he’d grown another head.

“It got in the way. I cut it,” Erik replied shortly, batting away Hank’s trunk when he made to feel it. “It’s not a big deal, guys.”

Alex scoffed. “Yeah, except _you_ didn’t cut it, did you? You got one of your new friends to do it with one of their fancy-”

“Have you been following me?” Erik demanded, barely remembering to keep his voice down in his anger.

“We don’t need to follow you to guess where you’ve been going, Erik,” Armando said quietly. He looked disappointed, an expression Erik had not been expecting to see at all. Not knowing how to respond, Erik simply stayed silent.

“Are they… are they treating you well?” Hank asked tentatively. “The animals like you?”

Erik rolled his eyes. “Of course they are. They’ve treated me better than Logan ever has, so I don’t know why he’s making you all so afraid of them. Humans are… amazing,” he whispered, feeling warmer and calmer just thinking about all the miraculous things he’d seen in the past month. “I hope they stay forever.”

The others were silent for a moment, then Sean spoke up. “They must be pretty cool if even you like them then,” he said.

Hank, Armando and Alex laughed, and Erik snorted, happy for the tension to be broken. “They are,” he replied. “They really, really are. So please, don’t tell Logan I’ve been seeing them.”

“We won’t,” Armando replied immediately, and Erik smiled gratefully. “It’s too bad we’ll never see them, though.”

Erik raised his eyebrows. “Never say never. I mean, I wouldn’t lead them back to the troop- there’s no telling what Logan might do if I did- but maybe you could come visit us sometime? Charles especially would love to meet you, I’m sure.”

“Charles?” Hank asked. “Is that the one we saw?”

“Yes. He’s the… the male,” Erik said, struggling to find the right words. “Or one of them. Their troops are very different. It’s hard to explain. But he’s wonderful. They all are, really. Except Shaw, but I don’t talk to him much anyway. Listen, I’ll tell you more at breakfast if you want. For now I think we should just get to bed.”

“Okay,” Alex said, grinning slightly. “I’m not looking forward to the ruckus your mom makes when she sees your hair, though.”

Erik grimaced. Perhaps he should have thought that decision through a little more carefully.


	10. Chapter 10

It was July 20th, just over halfway through their stay, and also, more importantly, it was Raven’s nineteenth birthday. Charles could tell she’d been feeling a little stir-crazy for the past few weeks. Raven liked to mingle with crowds, which was never a problem in Oxford, but of course was a major problem in the African rainforest. She’d accompanied Charles and Moira because of the opportunity for adventure, and while teaching and learning from Erik had proven very interesting, after a month and a half of looking at the same slides and books over and over again, Charles could see how she might be starting to find the whole process a little dull.

So, being the caring older brother that he was, Charles had planned a birthday celebration to surprise her. He knew she’d be expecting a cake since they had the ingredients to make one, but she didn’t know he’d stashed away a present for her at the beginning of their trip, along with a handful of her favourite records for the gramophone, and several bottles of wine. Those, though, he was saving for later tonight.

Right now he was baking the cake. Or rather, he was watching Moira bake the cake. He’d have done it himself, but while he was not too bad at cooking the canned and packaged foods they’d brought with them from England, he had always failed miserably at any sort of baking he’d ever attempted. Instead of trying and inevitably failing, which had happened on Raven’s past five birthdays (he’d always ended up going to the bakery in the end, his pride wounded) Charles had very bashfully asked Moira to prepare the cake, saying he would take her next cooking shift if she wanted.

“Really, thank you, Moira,” Charles said for perhaps the millionth time. “I know you were working it’s just-”

“It’s fine, Charles,” Moira cut him off, waving a hand and grinning. “Raven’s birthday is important. Besides, now I don’t have to cook breakfast tomorrow. Do you think Erik’s coming today?”

The abrupt change in subject jarred Charles for a moment, leaving him flustered. “Well, um, he should be, shouldn’t he? He’s never missed a day before.” He hesitated. It was getting a little late, and Erik normally came sometime after breakfast, although he had come in the afternoon as well, but those occasions had been few and far between. Suddenly, Charles found himself hoping very much that Erik was alright. “He left quite late last night; we were trying to get through another chapter of Sherlock Holmes. Perhaps he felt he should spend some more time with his family to make up for it.”

Moira sighed as she placed the lid on the Dutch oven, carrying it over to the fire to place it in the coals, pouring some on top. “You’re right, I bet he’ll turn up.”

As if on cue, a faint, familiar voice whispered Charles’ name from behind Moira’s tent. When Charles whirled around, Erik was crouching down next to it in an attempt to be inconspicuous. Charles laughed, making to call out and ask him what he was doing, but Erik stopped him, making violent shushing gestures. Wordlessly, he lifted a spear from the grass, mouthing, “Raven”, before grinning broadly.

Charles’ eyebrows raised in surprise. He turned to Moira. “Did you tell him to get her something?”

Moira shrugged. “I mentioned that it was customary to give gifts on birthdays, but I told him he didn’t have to bring anything. I guess he decided to anyway.”

A soft smile crept across Charles’ face. Erik really had adapted to them so well, it was almost like they’d known him for years instead of weeks. Erik made a quiet, impatient noise from his hiding spot, and Charles chuckled, motioning him forward.

“Raven’s out with Shaw,” Charles explained. “There’s a bird that keeps flying by. In fact, it looks rather like the bird I saw right before we met. Anyway. Shaw’s been trying to tame it for the past couple of days, but he hasn’t had much luck, so Raven went with him today. He said he needed a woman’s touch.” From beside him, Moira made a disparaging noise, and Charles frowned back at her, nodding his agreement. “Well,” he added forlornly, “at least it got her away so we could make the cake. And so we could decorate a little bit. Come on Erik, help me set up the gramophone.”

“I know that bird,” Erik said absentmindedly, spear swinging beside him as he followed Charles into his tent. “I don’t like her.”

Charles was taken aback. Could Erik speak bird too? “You don’t?” he asked, motioning for Erik to put down the spear and help him with the other end of the gramophone stand.

Erik looked around for a moment, trying to find a good hiding place for his present before he crouched, rolling it under Charles cot then standing up to help. “No,” he answered. “She’s always mocking me, I feel. There is something she knows that she is not telling me.”

This surprised Charles even more, his eyebrows creeping further and further up his forehead as he thought. Apparently Erik _could_ speak bird. And not only that, but he felt that the bird he could speak to was keeping something from him; that was even odder. But what sort of secret could a bird possibly have? Charles frowned, shaking his head. The whole situation was so confusing on so many levels he didn’t want to begin trying to wrap his head around it. Erik’s bird was probably just smug about knowing where to find the best seeds or something.

By the time Raven and Shaw returned, their attempts to woo the bird apparently fruitless, dinner was cooked, the cake was decorated, and the table was set.

“Happy birthday, Raven!” Charles, Moira, and Erik all chimed as soon as she drew closer, a smile instantly lighting her face when she saw them lined up in front of the table, the cake held in Charles’ hands.

“Aww, you shouldn’t have!” she said, laughing and drawing them each in for a hug. Her eyes darted behind Erik, suddenly, drawn by something. “And you brought the gramophone out too? This _is_ going to be a party.”

“Dinner first,” Charles said in mock sternness. “Then cake, then your presents.”

“Okay, okay, okay,” Raven replied, unable to stop grinning as she gestured for them to quickly sit down so they could start.

Dinner was especially good; Charles had decided to go further than his normal style of simply opening a can and pouring its contents into a Dutch oven to cook as is, and had instead added as much seasoning as he felt comfortable with. As a result, the mashed potatoes, cured ham, and black-eyed peas had more flavour than they’d all been used to for almost two months. Also, Charles had decided to surprise them all further and get out the first bottle of wine to go with dinner. Raven pronounced the meal one of the best Charles had ever made, kissing him affectionately on the cheek.

The cake was next: chocolate, and decorated with berries that spelled out “19”. There were no candles, but Raven closed her eyes and made a wish anyway, saying she had to eat all the berries instead so her wish would come true. No one argued with her, and by the time they were done eating and chatting, they had gone through another bottle of wine, and the sun was starting to set. Charles could feel his joints beginning to feel more fluid, his thoughts turning just a little hazy.

Everyone around the table was starting to look just little affected by the alcohol in fact; Moira was quicker to laugh, Raven’s tongue was becoming sharper. Even Shaw seemed to be enjoying himself just a little bit more. His smile didn’t always seem quite so sardonic. Erik though, was completely different than how Charles imagined he might be. Charles thought he would become as sassy as Raven, the two of them trying to outwit the other.

Erik was nothing like that, though. He was even quieter than usual, although Charles could tell he wasn’t disturbed by the effect of the alcohol; Charles had warned him about how he might feel when he poured him his first glass. It seemed he was perfectly content to sit back and watch the others chat animatedly while he watched, and, Charles noticed, his eyes seemed to be drifting to Charles more and more.

“Where are my presents?” Raven asked suddenly, breaking Charles out of his daydreaming. “You said dinner, then cake, then presents, then dancing, and I want to dance. So; presents, dear brother.”

Charles returned her grin. “Let me go get them. Erik?”

He heard Erik’s chair thump along the ground as Erik stood and followed him to his tent. Inside, Charles opened his trunk, rummaging around for a bit until his hand closed over the small, wrapped box containing Raven’s gift. When he stood up, Erik already had the spear clasped in his hand, looking the slightest bit nervous.

“She’ll love it,” Charles assured him, resting a hand gently on his forearm, and Erik smiled slightly. Going back to the edge of the tent, he poked his head out. “Close your eyes, Raven. Erik’s gift isn’t wrapped.”

Raven’s eyes were shut tight as she sat, her chair pulled out slightly from the table so Erik and Charles could stand in front of her. Hearing them approach, she stretched out her hands next to each other, palms up, so they could deposit their gifts in them. Erik shifted uncertainly for a moment before taking one of her hands and moving it so it grasped the handle of the spear. She gasped, her eyes flying open.

“A _spear?_ Erik! This is absolutely wonderful.” She looked up, beaming at Erik, who grinned back, his shoulders relaxing slightly. “This is amazing. Thank you, Erik.”

“You’re welcome,” he replied a little sheepishly, obviously not used to such enthusiastic responses to his gifts. “I can teach you how to throw it later, although perhaps we should wait until daylight.”

Raven nodded. “Yes, definitely. That would be fantastic.” She turned to Charles then, raising her eyebrows expectantly.

“I’m afraid it’s not quite as exciting as a spear, but I hope you like it anyway,” he said, handing her the box.

There was a small red ribbon tied decoratively on the top. Raven pulled at it, tying it absentmindedly in her hair when it came free, before opening the lid. “Oh, Charles!” she exclaimed, delicately lifting the gold-toothed comb from its padding and holding it up. There were pearls and tiny blue gemstones set in the base that cast shining spots of color across Raven’s face as they caught the last of the dying light.

“I saw you eyeing it in the shop every time we’d pass by,” Charles said quietly, shrugging.

“It’s lovely, Charles,” Raven said, looking up and catching her brother’s eye. Her smile was soft.

“Well,” Moira said, breaking the silence, “should we all dance then?”

“Dancing and more wine,” Raven agreed, standing and walking on only slightly wobbly legs towards the gramophone.

A few moments later, an up-tempo ragtime number was pumping through the speaker. Raven grabbed Charles and pulled him into a loose frame, leading more than following. She laughed, lifting up their arms so she could spin underneath before shoving Charles’ shoulder to force him to do the same. Charles was laughing as well, his giddiness a result of the combination of the drink and the music. Since coming to Africa they had had very little time to just relax and enjoy themselves, being too busy getting acclimated at first, then searching for gorillas and other wildlife, and then, of course, getting to know Erik. It was nice to just be able to let loose for a while and simply enjoy the good company.

Out of the corner of his eye, Charles saw Moira and Shaw dancing. It looked a little awkward to be honest, but at least they were all getting along. In fact, Shaw looked to be a wonderful dancer, manoeuvring himself and Moira around the open circle of tents in a complicated series of twirls. Erik, Charles saw with a grin, had gone over to the gramophone, crouching so he could watch the needle follow the groove of the record as it spun. Charles stopped them, Raven shooting him a questioning look.

“Why don’t you ask Erik to dance?” Charles said, smiling in encouragement. “I’m sure he’d love to learn. I’ll go get the rest of the wine.”

~

They danced for hours, pausing to talk and laugh and, of course, drink. Rosy-faced and feeling much more confident in his dancing abilities than was strictly accurate, Charles asked Shaw to teach him a particularly impressive twirl he’d done with Raven. His coordination was steadily declining, but he still managed it with Moira a few times, spinning her around and around before catching her and spinning them both and landing her in a dip. Raven clapped animatedly at that, whooping and hugging them both. Soon afterwards, Shaw turned in, reminding them good-naturedly to drink some water with their wine, and bidding them goodnight.

Charles had begged off dancing to the song currently playing. The beat was faster than the past few songs, enough that Charles doubted his ability to stay upright the entire time, especially when being led by a partner as exuberant as Raven. Shrugging, Raven had grabbed Moira’s hands instead, leaving the men to sit at the table while she and Moira polkaed in a circle around the camp. Charles watched them absentmindedly, his foot tapping in time to the music, before turning to Erik who, he was surprised to see, was already gazing blearily at him.

“Are you alright?” Charles asked, leaning forward to better see the other man’s face. “Feeling… feeling good?”

Erik’s eyes sparkled, the corners of his mouth turning up the slightest bit. “Yes. I feel very happy. I’m glad I had the wine.”

“Good,” Charles replied, resting his hand on Erik’s knee, stroking over the skin absentmindedly. “That’s wonderful. It’s so nice you could be here with us, you know, for Raven. It’s been a good party.”

“It has,” Erik agreed, his smile widening as he scooted fractionally closer, their knees brushing, reminding Charles that he hadn’t moved his hand. He didn’t pull away when he realized either.

Moira squawked abruptly, drawing their attention away from each other, but the two women ignored them, laughing. Apparently Moira had almost tripped over a tent rope, but she and Raven were up and away again already. Charles chuckled nervously, leaning back in his chair and twirling his glass, now filled with water, with the tips of his fingers.

“Birthdays at Oxford aren’t normally like this,” Charles said, taking a drink. “Usually I take Raven out for dinner and buy her a cake. We’ll invite a few friends over sometimes- Moira, Raven’s friend Angel. But usually her birthday ends up like most other nights; sitting in the living room with me trying to convince her to play a round of chess with me.”

Erik was silent for a moment, perhaps processing all Charles had said before he asked, “What’s chess?”

“Oh, it’s wonderful!” Charles exclaimed. He sat up straighter, leaning forward with the force of his enthusiasm. “It’s a game played with a board covered in black and white squares. There are pieces that can move in different ways, and the object is to take the other person’s king. It’s all quite complicated, actually. But I can show you in the morning. When we’re both not so…” he trailed off, waggling his fingers beside his head in lieu of finding a word, and Erik laughed in response.

For a moment they just looked at each other, grinning stupidly, an unspoken emotion abruptly springing up between them, making the very air feel taught with anticipation the longer they looked. This was hardly the first time Charles had felt this way with Erik, but it was the first time he’d seen that same feeling reflected back at him and known, deep down somehow, that Erik was feeling exactly the same way he was. That Erik was even looking at him that way out in public where his sister could see made Charles’ chest suddenly tight with nerves, and the smile slipped from his face.

He quickly took another drink of water, draining his glass and trying to ignore the way Erik’s face had fallen as well; the way he mirrored Charles’ movements just out of habit, drinking from his own cup. When they set their glasses down, Charles found it impossible to meet Erik’s eyes. He was spared having to speak, however, when Raven’s voice sounded from the near the gramophone, stealing his attention.

“Moira and I are turning in,” she announced. “We’ll take this back into the research tent to make sure it doesn’t somehow get ruined, though. Thank you for the party. It was really, really fun.”

Charles forced a smile back on his face, getting up to give Raven a hug and kiss goodnight, and a final, “Happy birthday.” Erik nodded to her in acknowledgement before shifting his gaze to Charles again. Still looking puzzled, he watched as Charles strode over to the table and picked up the empty glasses, storing them away in their proper cabinets set up next to the fire pit off to the side of camp that they used to cook all their meals. By the time Charles was done, Raven and Moira had returned to their prospective tents, leaving Charles and Erik alone.

Erik opened his mouth, trying to figure out how best to communicate what he wanted so badly to say, but English was so damn difficult to speak even without the buzz of alcohol, and before he could manage all the right words in the right order, Charles was speaking.

“Do you want to stay the night?” he asked, shooting Erik a fleeting look, then staring promptly back down at the ground. “I mean, you… you probably don’t want to go home like this. Of course, if you do, that’s perfectly fine; I just thought…” he trailed off, shrugging slightly as he grinned sheepishly at Erik through his lashes.

Erik blinked, completely taken aback. He’d been sure Charles was about to reprimand him, to explain that while he was flattered by Erik’s advances, he didn’t want to become mates- husbands, as Moira had explained once a few weeks ago. Being asked to stay, though, that was more than he ever hoped he’d get. “Yes,” he managed finally, ignoring how croaky his voice sounded. “I would like to stay very much.”

“You could stay in my tent, if you like,” Charles said very quickly, even as he met Erik’s eyes with thinly veiled want. “Or in the research tent is-”

“I’d like to stay with you,” Erik answered before Charles had even finished speaking. “If that’s okay.”

Charles nodded, biting his lip. “Come on then,” he said, turning and leading the way, Erik tottering a bit as he followed.

They were silent as they stepped into the dark tent. Charles didn’t even bother to light the hurricane lamp next to his bed, choosing to sift through his trunk for two pairs of pajama bottoms in darkness instead, letting their eyes adjust. He hadn’t ever asked Erik to wear clothes before, partly because he didn’t want him to feel Charles was changing him, and partly because the sight of mostly-naked Erik was inarguably nice. Now, though, Charles was already walking a thin line, and Erik sans pants would most definitely push him over the edge. It was for his own sanity that he tossed the second pair of striped pajama bottoms to Erik, saying shortly, “Put these on.”

Turning his back, he shucked his own clothes and pulled on his pajamas as quickly as he could without tripping over his own feet. When he turned back around, Erik was also dressed, the hems on the pants almost comically high, while the waist was slung low on his hips. The expression on his face was hard to make out, far away as he was standing, but Charles’ own stomach was doing back flips, his sense of light-headedness exacerbated by the lingering effects of the alcohol.

“Come on,” he said again, holding out a hand and drawing Erik back with him towards the bed.

He pulled back the quilt and top sheet, never letting go of Erik until he pulled him down onto the small, uncomfortable cot. They shifted, a little awkward, all elbows and knees on the mattress barely big enough for the two of them. Eventually, they ended up smashed front-to-front, Charles’ head tucked up under Erik’s chin, his breath puffing lightly against the other man’s chest, and their arms wrapped lightly around the other’s waist.

Charles wanted so, _so_ badly to press a kiss against Erik’s warm skin, to trail his hand up his ribcage, leaving gooseflesh in its wake. But he did not. Erik had agreed to come with him to spend the night, and Charles knew from the way Erik had been looking at him- the way he looked at him always- that this wouldn’t be a decision either of them would regret. However, they were both still somewhat drunk, and that meant this would go no further tonight.

Still, when Erik pulled him in closer, running his fingers absentmindedly along the bumps of his spine, Charles did not stop him. In fact, he nuzzled closer until Erik was completely surrounding him, his soft, earthy scent oddly soothing. Everything about having Erik finally in his arms felt right.

And in a few weeks, he’d be returning home without him. The sudden thought made him feel icy, and he swallowed, tamping down the uncomfortable feeling of something like panic at the thought of losing Erik. He’d never really thought about leaving before, so caught up in this thing developing between them, and in teaching and learning from Erik. Now, though, he realized that if they wanted to stay together- and Charles, at least, wanted that very, very much- one of them would have to give up everything.

Erik must have noticed the change in Charles’ mood, because his hand stopped it’s trailing and he pulled back, searching Charles’ face in the darkness. “What’s the matter?” he asked quietly, a frown creasing his brow.

“It’s nothing,” Charles answered immediately. “I just… I don’t ever want to leave.”

The frown deepened briefly, before a rueful smile replaced it instead. “Don’t think about that, Charles,” Erik said, wrapping his arms around Charles’ waist and pulling him close once more. “Be with me now.”

Charles could hardly argue with that. Pushing away the negative thoughts was much easier when he was snuggled in close, Erik’s heartbeat a soft metronome thumping gently away. He was already half-asleep when he remembered to mumble, “Goodnight, Erik,” and he only vaguely registered the lips brushing lightly across his temple.

“Goodnight, Charles.”


	11. Chapter 11

Soft birdsong awoke Charles the next morning, sunlight seeping in through the bottom of the tent. He moaned unhappily, flipping from his back to his side so he could burrow automatically into Erik’s chest before he realized what he was doing. Erik, however, seemed to share his sentiments. His arms wrapped around Charles’ back as they had when they first slipped into bed, pulling him in so he could bury his face in Charles’ hair. Charles released a shaky breath, letting himself relax.

“Good morning,” he murmured after a pause, his lips brushing the skin of Erik’s clavicle.

“Good morning.” Erik’s voice was rough with sleep as he brought a hand up to run lightly through Charles’ hair.

For a long time they barely moved at all, content to lay in silence as the world woke up with them. Then, so slowly Charles almost couldn’t tell what was happening, Erik was tipping Charles’ head back, cupping his cheek and reeling him slowly in. Charles’ eyes snapped open wide, and Erik, watching through his own half-lidded eyes, froze suddenly, looking hesitant.

Immediately, Charles felt like laughing and screaming at the same time. Knowing he wasn’t alone in his feelings- that it wasn’t an alcohol addled brain that had made Erik accept coming to his bed- made his heart feel like it might burst with happiness. At the same time, being with Erik was going to be difficult. If Raven or Moira ever showed their suspicions about his sexuality, they never mentioned it, and he wasn’t quite ready to tell them all himself. God, this would all have been so much easier if Erik hadn’t been so wonderful.

But Erik was looking very worried now; pulling slightly away as if afraid he’d overstepped his boundaries. Quickly, Charles slid his hand to rest on the column of the other man’s throat, holding him in place.

“It’s alright,” he said reassuringly, inching closer again. Erik’s gaze was flickering from Charles’ mouth to his eyes. “I want to kiss you, too. It’s just… there are going to be consequences, and I don’t want to get you into anything you don’t want to be in.”

Erik swallowed hard. “It doesn’t matter,” he croaked, his breath hot against Charles’ bitten red lips. “Whatever you want, I’ll do it, Charles.”

Their noses brushed, nuzzling gently before Charles whispered, “Then kiss me.”

Erik’s mouth was on his in an instant, muffling his involuntary moan. He pressed himself further up into the other man’s touch, arching his back and moving his hands from Erik’s neck into his hair, gripping it gently. A distant part of his brain noted that his mouth probably tasted as terrible to Erik as it did to himself after all they’d drank last night, but he couldn’t be bothered to care. He’d been wanting this for weeks and weeks; since the first day he’d met Erik to be honest. Erik was perfect, so different from any other man he’d met, so quiet, but determined and strong, never backing down from any challenge. He was Charles’ match in every way.

Another soft moan escaped his lips when Erik finally pulled back, a grin on his face that Charles could feel before he could see. It took a moment for Charles’ eyes to flutter open again, but when they did, he was smiling as well. He forced himself to stay where he was, to not move in again for another, deeper kiss. There were already quiet rustlings from outside, which meant the others were waking and would be wondering where Charles was. Oh _damn_ he was supposed to make breakfast!

“I’m sorry,” he said, running his fingers smoothly through Erik’s short-cropped hair, fixing where he’d mussed it earlier. “It’s my turn to cook breakfast. I have to get up.”

Erik shifted closer, nosing at Charles’ neck and nipping lightly at his skin. “I will get food,” he purred, which was not helping Charles’ resolve at all. “You stay here and I will bring it back.”

He was already moving, half-off the bed, when Charles grabbed his arm, adrenaline suddenly surging through him. His heart began to pound rapidly, and his mouth felt suddenly dry. He’d hoped so much he wouldn’t have to have this talk with Erik until later, but it seemed they would have to have it now. Erik was watching him curiously over his shoulder, still looking ready to hop up and go as soon as Charles told him it was okay.

“Listen, Erik,” Charles began tentatively, sitting up and moving so he was holding Erik’s hand rather than his forearm. “I want to be with you. I really, really do, but… that’s not something that- I mean, the others would be surprised if they found out about us.”

“Surprised?” Erik was frowned, scooting closer.

Charles nodded. “Yes. You see, most of the time, where I come from, men don’t… they don’t sleep with other men,” he said, feeling his throat constrict and his heart clench as the words left his mouth. “They don’t kiss them. Not in public anyway. And men who do want to kiss and sleep with other men- like me- they often keep it a secret. You can be locked up for wanting it, Erik.” He swallowed hard. “Do you understand?”

Erik was silent for a moment, staring down at the bedclothes. Charles waited, biting his lip and willing the lump in his throat to disappear.

“That’s wrong,” Erik said suddenly, looking up and glaring so vehemently that Charles actually shrank back as if he’d been burned. “Why?”

“Well,” Charles said, floundering in the face of the most obvious question, one he didn’t have a real answer for. “It’s not something most people-”

“Why does that mean anything?” Erik broke in, ignoring the hand Charles placed on his shoulder in an attempt to quiet him. “It has nothing to do with anyone else! I’m not harming anyone when I kiss you or hold you. Or if I brought you food- but even that would be too much? Do you really want to push aside your own feelings to make sure you don’t offend anyone else by showing them how we care for each other?”

“I-” Charles choked, but Erik kept talking over him, his voice escalating, and Charles was terrified someone would overhear.

“No one in the troop cares when Alex and Armando go off together.”

“Erik, wha?-”

“Logan’s not going to throw them out of the family just because they are mates. He didn’t throw me out for being different even if he might’ve wanted to, why would he do that to them?”

“Erik, please,” Charles whispered, bringing a slightly trembling hand up to Erik’s cheek. Something in the gesture or the look on Charles’ face must have caught his attention, because the murderous look in his eye suddenly melted away, replaced by something like regret. “I agree with you. I do. But it _does_ matter. To me at least. I could lose my job, my friends… everything.” He took a deep breath, moving his arms around Erik’s neck and drawing closer so he could rest his head on his shoulder. Beneath his forehead, he could feel the other man’s rapid pulse slowing down as he calmed. “Please, _please_ , can we just… can we go slowly for now? I’ll tell Raven and Moira someday soon, but I need to decide when for myself. Is that… That has to be okay, Erik.”

There was a short silence where Charles tried to ignore the way the rest of the camp had grown as quiet as himself and Erik. Then finally, Erik sighed, leaning into Charles and wrapping his arms around his shoulders.

“It’s okay,” he murmured. “But I won’t hide who I am from everyone else forever, Charles.”

“I’m not expecting you to,” Charles replied soothingly. “Just for a few weeks.” He pulled away, smiling gently. “Now, I am going to put on some clothes so I can start breakfast. You can get dressed and join us if you like.”

“I should go back to my mother,” Erik said, his expression apologetic. “She’ll be worrying about me since I didn’t come home last night.”

Charles bit his lip nervously. “But… you’ll be coming back later, yes?”

“Of course,” Erik answered. “I have to teach Raven to throw her new spear.”

~

Erik felt lighter than he ever had as he jumped from vine to vine, making his way back to the nests. True, Charles was still incredibly skittish about the change in their relationship- when Raven had spotted them exiting the tent together that morning, Charles had lied and said Erik had slept on the ground- but they had _kissed_. Erik wanted to shout, he was so happy. Someday soon, Charles would forget his worries and tell Raven and Moira about them just like he’d promised, and they wouldn’t have to hide like most people did in the stupid human world.

In fact, Erik thought, for all the wonders humans had created and discovered, none of the pictures or books Charles, Raven, and Moira had shown him had even come close to the beauty of the jungle. Surely Charles saw that and wanted to stay with Erik, especially now that they were together and no one here would care. They could be safe in the jungle.

A few weeks ago, Erik had asked Moira if the tents would hold up for the spring rain and she replied, very reluctantly, that they wouldn’t be here. They were sailing back to England in a little over a month. Before then, Erik had had no idea they would be leaving at all. He was hurt at first, wondering why they would choose to keep such an important piece of information away from him, deciding to punish them with silence.

After a day of being taciturn and feigning indifference, however, Charles had looked upset, so rather than picking a fight with him, Erik had decided to try and enjoy his company while he still could. He’d been hoping that somehow he would pluck up the courage and ask Charles to stay with him- to ask them all to stay- before their boat arrived. Now it seemed he didn’t need to.

He was still grinning when he dropped silently to the ground on all fours, just outside the circle of nests. Spotting his mother in hers, he quickly hid behind a thicket of ferns before prowling forward like a cat, ready to pounce.

“Don’t even think about it, Erik,” she said, her voice dangerously low.

Erik was immediately chagrined, freezing inches away from her back, his hands in the air poised for attack. “How did you know-” he began, moving to face her.

“Never mind that,” she interrupted, plowing right over him. “Where were you last night? Or should I ask where it is you’ve been running off to for a long time now?” Erik’s jaw dropped, his mind working furiously to figure out how much his mother knew. The intensity of her anger weakened just a little, however, as she added, “I’m not stupid, Erik. I know you haven’t been with your cousins.”

Erik found himself wishing he’d taken up Charles’ offer and stayed for breakfast. If he had, he wouldn’t have had to endure his mother’s piercing stare as she watched him struggle for words, patiently chewing her section of melon. He knew she would have noticed his long absences from the troop, but those weren’t completely unusual. He often went off with the others from early in the morning to late in the day, sometimes not even arriving home until after supper.

Telling her the truth was not an option; she’d just be angry with him for endangering the whole troop, scared by Logan’s stories of humans. She might even tell Logan he’d been fraternizing with the enemy, thinking she was helping him when she obviously wouldn’t be. Edie’s eyebrows rose higher and higher the longer Erik remained silent.

_She’s going to find out,_ he thought, panicking. _She’ll find out and then she’ll tell Logan and he’ll make sure I never see Charles again nononono._

“I’ve been going off,” Erik blurted out, saying the first thing that popped into his head. “Thinking… I’ve been doing a lot of thinking.” Edie looked unimpressed, so he stumbled on. “I want to learn how to live by myself. Without a troop. Or, no; I don’t want to rely on a troop anymore, not unless I have to.”

It was partially true, and the best lies always had a bit of truth in them. Once gorillas came of age, the males would break off into small groups of their own, wandering around together until they found mates. He could have left with the last group several years ago, but he’d always been closer to Alex, Armando, and Sean. That, and the thought of leaving his mother- the only one of his family besides those three cousins who didn’t eye him suspiciously when they thought he wasn’t looking- had been too upsetting. But for a while now he had been feeling the strange, bone-deep urge to leave, although now he thought it had less to do with avoiding the others and much more to do with meeting Charles.

Edie’s expression grew soft, and Erik felt his shoulders sag in relief. “Oh, Erik,” she said, leaning in closer and cupping his chin. “This isn’t because of anything Logan said, is it? No matter what he says there’s nothing wrong with you being different. You’ve always been one of the family and you always will be. Knowing that… that there’s others out there like you doesn’t change that.”

“I know, Mama,” Erik replied, uncomfortable at remembering their earlier argument from when Charles and the others had first arrived. “It’s really got nothing to do with Logan at all. This is something I have to do for myself.”

“Okay then,” Edie said. “I believe you. Perhaps you are getting old enough that I shouldn’t be worried about where you are all the time anyway. Just don’t spend all your time out on your own. It is dangerous in the jungle, you know.”

“Yes, Mama,” Erik answered, gently resting his hand against her wrist for a moment before pulling away. “I came back to have breakfast with you, though.”

“How sweet,” Edie beamed, waving towards a pile of fruit lying against a tree. “Help yourself.”

Erik felt a mixture of relief and guilt at the blatant lie he’d told his mother. It was the first time he’d ever been deceitful of something so important to him, and it hurt to know deep down that it was the right thing to do. His mother may accept him unconditionally, but she had been just as scared as all the others upon learning humans were in the forest. Logan had brainwashed them all, and for absolutely no reason, Erik thought angrily.

He chose a piece of fruit as he thought, taking his time before going back to his mother. He decided he’d spend the morning with her, and Armando, Alex, and Sean. He really did miss them, but after that he had to go back to the camp. Aside from promising Raven he’d help her learn how to use her new spear, he was eager to see Charles again, unhappy with the way they’d parted. He understood now that his initial anger had died down, how Charles could be afraid. After all, he’d lived with being different his whole life and it wasn’t a pleasant thing. He could wait. Until Charles was ready to tell the others, Erik was prepared to steal every moment alone with him he could, just to show Charles how much better it would be once they didn’t have to hide.

~

The sound of Erik and Raven’s laughter was barely audible as Charles sat at the table, writing in his research journal, but it made him pause, smiling, anyway. Ever since this morning Charles had been trying to mask his happiness by biting his lip or ducking his head whenever that stupid grin crept across his face, refusing to leave. Raven had noticed, he was sure of it, but when she’d asked him about it, he’d simply replied, “It’s a nice day.”

He probably wouldn’t have been able to get any of the work done he desperately needed to if Erik hadn’t stolen Raven away almost as soon as he’d arrived that afternoon. Moira had followed them, wanting to learn spear throwing herself, leaving Charles and Shaw alone in the camp as the guide finished cooking supper.

Charles bit his lip, shaking his head as if to clear it, and turned back to his journal. Where it had been originally intended for taking notes on the gorillas they found, it had soon evolved into a book almost entirely about Erik; his mannerisms, his diet, how quickly he had learned to speak English, his willingness to adapt to living with other humans. Charles should be disappointed that, while he had found Erik, they weren’t even coming close to finding what they’d come to Africa for in the first place, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

Almost as if he could read his thoughts, Shaw chose that moment to speak up. “Funny, you’re being this happy today,” he said airily, waving a wooden spoon at nothing. “Yesterday was the three week mark until the boat arrives, and there’s not a gorilla in sight- not counting Erik of course.”

Charles frowned, hunching over his notebook once more. “It’s a nice day,” he said dismissively, but Shaw didn’t take the hint.

“That’s what you said to Raven,” he pointed out, smiling at Charles even though he wasn’t looking.

“Is it?”

“Yes,” Shaw answered, sitting down at the table much to Charles’ disappointment. “I suppose you have gotten a bit side-tracked though. About the gorillas, I mean. It’s easy to forget your main goal when you have him around.”

Charles smiled icily at Shaw, setting his journal down. “Erik is quite distracting,” he replied neutrally.

Shaw nodded. “I don’t suppose you’ve gotten your priorities mixed up, at all,” he said, and Charles felt his stomach sink for a moment from the glint in the other man’s eye. “That would be rather out of character for a man such as yourself.”

Charles opened his mouth, shutting it almost immediately when he realized he didn’t have a response. The grin playing at the corners of Shaw’s mouth grew, and for some reason, Charles began to feel like a mouse caught in a trap. Angry and shaken, he almost snapped at Shaw, asking him why he cared so much, when Raven, Moira, and Erik strode into camp.

“Ah!” Shaw said, standing up and sparing Charles one more awful glance before training his smile on the others. “You’re just in time for dinner.”

Moira and Raven moved to grab the tableware, but Erik, seeing Charles unsettled, walked quietly over to crouch next to his chair.

“Is there something wrong?” he muttered, looking concernedly up at Charles.

Charles bit his lip, not quite meeting Erik’s eyes. “I’ll tell you about it later,” he said, standing suddenly. He could tell Erik wasn’t happy with the answer, but he’d have to wait for now. If Charles had had his suspicions about Shaw before, now he knew for sure he was after something more than a pay check. Charles just wished he knew what.


	12. Chapter 12

Dinner was relatively uneventful compared the scare Shaw had given Charles earlier. His continued, smug silence throughout the meal just served to make Charles even more nervous, making him only half pay attention to Raven as she chattered excitedly about her new spear. Erik, however, seemed to be talking enough for the both of them, successfully drawing Raven or Moira’s attention when they started to notice how uneasy Charles was acting. Almost as soon as Charles had set his silverware down, Erik was swooping in to the rescue again.

“Good, Charles,” he said quickly, taking Charles’ plate and setting it atop his own. “Now you are done, which means I get to give you vine lessons like you promised you’d do last night.”

“I-” Charles began, flabbergasted, but Erik had already dropped off their plates by the washtub and was now attempting to pull him away from the table.

“No, no,” Erik chastised. “You have been avoiding it for far too long, and all you have been doing today is sitting while Raven and Moira and I threw spears.”

“Go with him, Charles,” Moira said encouragingly.

“Yes, quit being such a scaredy-cat,” Raven chimed in. “It’s really, really fun. And Erik’s a wonderful teacher.”

“Thank you, Raven,” Erik said, shooting her a grin. “Come along then, Charles.”

Having no other option- he really did want to talk to Erik alone about what Shaw had said, and Erik had given them both the perfect excuse to get away- Charles rose from the table, feigning a sigh of defeat.

“Alright, alright,” he said, standing up and allowing Erik to keep his hold on his hand. “Lead away.”

~

Neither of them spoke as they trekked through the underbrush, the sounds of the camp long since lost to the noises of the rainforest. Though the light was dim, Erik knew where he was going; he could even begin to make out the sounds of rushing water if he listened hard enough. As far as he knew, Charles and the others had never come to the pool with the waterfall, and while it was closer to the nests than Erik had ever brought them, the gorillas wouldn’t be near at this time of night.

Gradually, the trees began to get fewer, and the rush of the waterfall louder, until suddenly, they were stepping out onto the bank of the watering hole. The bright moon illuminated the whole space, making it seem almost even more beautiful than it did in sunlight. Behind him, Charles stopped abruptly, pulling on Erik’s hand to make him pause as well. When Erik turned, he saw Charles’ jaw had dropped.

“Erik,” he breathed, and Erik felt his stomach flip at the look on his face. “This is beautiful.”

Erik’s pleased grin betrayed the nonchalance in his shrug. “It’s far away and it has good vines. You didn’t think you’d actually gotten out of learning, did you?”

Charles laughed, stepping closer into Erik’s space. “I guess that was too much to hope for.”

“It was,” Erik replied quietly, snaking an arm around Charles’ waist, leaning down so their noses were almost brushing.

In an instant, Charles was standing on tiptoe, wrapping his arms around Erik’s neck and bringing their lips together. Erik tightened the arm around his waist, tilting his head so their mouths slotted more easily against one another. A small hum vibrated in Charles’ chest, so close Erik could feel it, and then Charles was opening his mouth deepening the kiss even more. 

Erik was starting to feel dizzy, almost in the way the alcohol had made him last night, but it was Charles in his arms, his soft, clean scent filling Erik’s nostrils as he arched up against him that was making his knees weak, and not some drug. Too soon, Charles was pulling away, planting one last kiss at the corner of Erik’s mouth before resting their foreheads together, their breathing heavy.

“I have to tell you something,” he said, his voice rough.

“Do you have to tell me now?” Erik asked.

Charles snorted. “Yes, unfortunately. It’s about Shaw and… something else.” He pulled away to look Erik in the eye. “Do you know why we came here to Africa?”

“To meet gorillas,” Erik answered, smiling. “But then you found me instead.”

“That’s right,” Charles replied, running his fingers through the short hair at the nape of Erik’s neck. “And I’m very glad we did. You know Moira and I are scientists, and we’ve learned more than I think we could have ever hoped for when we met you. But...” Charles paused, and an ugly feeling sank into the pit of Erik’s stomach. Was Charles not as happy with Erik as he thought he was? Maybe he had decided Erik wasn’t worth the risk of being discovered. “Would it be possible to meet your family? Just for a day even, we could learn so much. I came here wanting to know how they live- how _you_ live. I came such a long way to see it. I don’t want to go home without finding out.”

Erik frowned. “Go home?”

“Back to England,” Charles elaborated, looking suddenly nervous. “And actually… I’ve been wanting to talk to you about that as well. But the gorillas, Erik. Could you take us to them?”

He looked so hopeful that while Erik should have been angry, should have felt used, but he knew he hadn’t been at all. Charles wasn’t demanding. If Erik couldn’t take him to the gorillas, he knew Charles wouldn’t be mad. Still, Charles had done so much for Erik; Erik wished he could do this one small thing for him. The fact that he couldn’t made him feel awful.

“I can’t,” he said despondently. “I’m sorry. It’s Logan.”

“Who?” Charles asked, nonplussed.

“Our leader. He doesn’t like humans. He thinks they’re dangerous. If I brought you back home…” Erik grimaced. “I think the least that would happen is I would have to leave the troop.”

Charles’ eyes went wide and he stepped back, breaking out of Erik’s arms completely. “The _least?_ ” he choked out. “What would happen if he found out you’ve been with us for the past two months?”

“No,” Erik said hurriedly, grabbing Charles’ wrist and pulling him in again. “No, he wouldn’t hurt me. At least, I don’t think he would. He would hurt you though. And Raven and Moira. I can’t let that happen.” The way Charles was looking at him was inscrutable. It made Erik want to squirm, but he didn’t, holding gently onto Charles’ wrist instead, brushing lightly against his pulse point.

After a moment, Charles sighed. “I suppose that might actually be for the best,” he admitted quietly. “Shaw’s been asking after the gorillas a lot more lately too, but I’m not sure why he’s so interested. He’s only a guide after all, and he said he’d been to Africa before. He’s had experience tracking gorillas. I just don’t understand why he’s being so aggressive about it.”

Erik frowned. “Well, he won’t be able to find them, not while Logan’s still on edge. But forget about that now. I said I’d teach you how to swing and I meant it.”

Not waiting for Charles to argue, he led the way a little further down the bank to a tall tree. Vines dangled thick and sturdy, from high up in the branches where it was too dark to see. Erik had been coming here since he was a little boy, using the vines to swing out over the water and dive in. It was the perfect spot to teach Charles. Each vine was long enough that he could get a good feel for the proper technique without having to worry about switching to another before he was ready. That, and if Charles got too nervous, he could let go and land safely in the water.

He explained as much as they walked, Charles making vague noises of affirmation that Erik could still sense the nervousness in. “It’ll be okay, Charles,” he said, grinning knowingly. “Take your shoes off, it’ll be easier to climb.” He clambered up onto the lowest branch of the giant tree, turning and holding out a hand to help Charles up. “Trust me?”

Charles scoffed, rolling his eyes, but he made no more attempts at objecting as they climbed up several more feet. Erik’s grin widened, knowing he’d won. When they were around ten feet up, Erik crouched, crawling along the branch they’d stopped on. It was thick enough he could have stayed standing, but as soon as he’d left the trunk still upright, Charles had made a disparaging noise, so he figured he would be as cautious as possible for Charles’ sanity. 

“Here,” he said as he grabbed the closest vine, tugging on it to show that it wouldn’t break. Charles’ gaze was still sceptical, but he crawled cautiously out away from the trunk.

“It’s really easy,” Erik continued as Charles inched closer. “You just hang on and let the vine do all the work for you. Let yourself go limp. Except your arms of course.” Charles had reached him now, and Erik tugged on his wrist, tucking him in closer to his side. “The vine will hold, I promise. Just don’t fight the motion. It might feel odd at first, but you’ll be safe, I promise. Besides, as soon as you swing out, you’ll be over water and you can let go if you want. And I’ll be right behind you.”

Pressed side-to-side, an arm wrapped around his shoulders, Erik could feel just how tense Charles was, but there was a determined set to Charles’ jaw as he stared down the vine Erik was still holding.

“If I break my neck doing this it’s your fault,” he said finally, shrugging gently out of Erik’s hold and taking the vine from him. His hands shook slightly, but he seemed to be ignoring it.

Erik laughed. “We’re not that high up, Charles.”

“High enough,” Charles grumbled. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath in through his nose and releasing it through his mouth. Erik had to suppress an amused smile. Then suddenly, his eyes snapped open and he jumped off the branch, clutching tightly onto the vine as a small yelp slipped from his mouth as if he’d surprised himself at his own abruptness.

Erik hadn’t even had time to grab his own vine. He scrabbled for one now as Charles let out another shout and let go, far out over the water, landing with a loud splash.

“Charles!” Erik shouted, finally finding a strong enough vine and kicking off hard from the tree.

He dropped down barely a foot from where Charles was treading water and coughing, spitting water from his mouth. Erik broke the surface, gasping in a lungful of air and turning, arms already reaching out to help Charles. But, he realized with a start, Charles didn’t need help at all; he was laughing, rather loudly in fact. His head was tossed back as he bobbed gently from the movement of the waves and his limbs under the water.

“That was brilliant!” he crowed, spitting out more water. “Terrifying, but brilliant! You were right, Erik. I never should have doubted you.”

Erik frowned, a little hurt. “You startled me,” he said, but Charles just smiled at him. “You shouted. I thought you were… I thought you couldn’t swim or something.”

“Oh, Erik, don’t be silly. Of course I can swim,” Charles chided lightly. “I just was a little startled is all, so I let go. I didn’t know how to stop otherwise. I am sorry I frightened you though,” he added, seeing Erik’s frown deepen. “I didn’t mean to.” He paused, looking contemplative. The beat was so long Erik almost turned around and swam back to shore, but then Charles’ bit his lip quickly, then blurted out, “You… your clothes flew up when you jumped in, though.”

Almost as soon as the words left Charles’ mouth, he turned and began paddling swiftly away, leaving Erik to float for a moment, translating what he’d just heard. He was almost back to shore when Erik’s jaw dropped, half-embarrassed, half-thankful at the turn of events.

“Wait, Charles!” he called, scrambling as quickly towards the frozen figure halfway out of the lake. Charles turned, biting his lip again as Erik sloshed closer.

Finally they were close enough that Erik wanted to reach out and cup his hand to Charles’ neck, but he aborted the gesture almost as soon as he’d raised his arm. “Sorry,” he said lamely.

“It’s fine,” Charles replied immediately. “It’s. You know. Things like that are bound to happen when that’s all you wear. I shouldn’t have brought it up anyway. It’s not a huge- erm-” he broke off with a sharp, tense laugh. “I mean. It’s okay.”

Erik nodded, inching a little closer, relief flooding him when Charles didn’t back away; instead he watched evenly as Erik closed the distance between them. His eyes flickered down, watching as Charles’ tongue slowly dragged across his bottom lip, wetting it as his eyes drifted slowly shut. Their lips pressed together softly at first, almost a brush more than a kiss, but then Charles shifted, turning his head and pressing more firmly against Erik. Erik released a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding and moved his hand from Charles’ shoulder to rest gently against the back of his neck.

They were both still waist-deep in water, but Charles didn’t seem to mind, and Erik didn’t have the willpower to move, not when Charles was kissing him like this: slow and deep, his tongue playing along Erik’s bottom lip. Erik wondered vaguely if kissing Charles was always going to be this intoxicating. He doubted it could be any different; even if the boat never came, and Charles stayed here _where he belonged_ , Erik would never get used to the soft noises Charles was making, or the slow, wet drag of his perfect lips against Erik’s. He wanted Charles’ shirt gone, to feel the warm press of Charles’ skin. Charles always wore too many clothes anyway.

Tentatively, Erik moved his hand from Charles’ nape to his collarbone. The top of the shirt was already unbuttoned. Erik moved his thumb a little to the right so it was brushing over warm skin instead of soaked fabric, and Charles sucked in a breath. For a moment, Erik was afraid Charles would pull away, but he didn’t. Without breaking the kiss, he raised his hand from where it had been resting on Erik’s hip, and began undoing the second button. It was a little difficult to do with one hand, though, and Erik broke away when Charles seemed too focused on the unyielding button to kiss properly. He rested their foreheads together instead, both of them breathing a little raggedly, and the button finally gave, revealing more pale skin, flecked with freckles, for Erik’s eager eyes.

Erik was too impatient to watch Charles to struggle through the next one, so he batted Charles’ hand away, replacing it with his own. Charles seemed to concede defeat because suddenly, he was kissing Erik again, rocking against him when he pulled the rest of the shirt out of Charles’ trousers, pressing calloused palms to the warm, damp skin of Charles’ stomach.

As soon as the fabric was free, Charles began shucking it off his arms, helped along by Erik, who finally threw the offending garment off towards the bank where it landed with a wet _thunk_. They pressed together again, Charles gasping as he wrapped his arms around Erik’s waist, tighter than he had before. The movement made Erik stumbled forward half a step, their legs bumping together slightly now that they were flush from knee to collarbone.

Erik sucked in a breath, and at the same time Charles finally did pull away, not far, just far enough that their lips weren’t touching anymore. There was no mistaking the hardness nudging the inside of Erik’s thigh, especially since his own erection was digging into Charles’ stomach, right below his belly button. His heart was thundering in his chest as he waited, watching with half-lidded eyes for Charles to make the next move.

Slowly, Charles leaned into Erik’s neck, nuzzling gently before dropping a kiss to his skin. Erik groaned, canting his hips automatically when Charles flattened himself against him once more.

“Let’s get these clothes off, yes?” he whispered against Erik’s throat, trailing a hand down to tease at the jumping muscles of Erik’s stomach before dipping his fingers below the surface of the water.

They ran along the waistband of Erik’s loincloth, thumbs hooking in alongside his hips and tugging down slightly as Charles bit gently at Erik’s neck, soothing immediately over the area with his tongue. Erik groaned, his own fingers joining Charles to pull his only clothing off, tossing it away with Charles’ shirt on the bank. He threaded his hands through Charles’ hair, gently pulling him away from his neck so he could crush their mouths together as he quickly undid the fastenings on Charles’ trousers.

A short gasp from Charles ghosted across Erik’s lips as he pulled the trousers and Charles’ underwear down. The wet fabric bunched up almost immediately, before Erik could pull it completely over Charles’ arse. Erik groaned in exasperation as Charles shimmied awkwardly, finally managing to tug the soaking material down and off, turning to throw it towards the rest of the clothing with all his might.

When he spun back around, Erik immediately wrapped his arms around him, dragging Charles in and up so he could hook his legs over Erik’s hips. Their cocks aligned a second before their mouths did, and at the last minute, Erik had to move so their foreheads were resting together instead, a breath hissing in through his nose at the electrifying feeling of skin on skin. Charles keened quietly, rolling his hips forward and setting a languorous rhythm.

Sparks seemed to dance behind Erik’s tightly shut eyes, flaring even brighter each time Charles’ cock slid smoothly against his own. He swallowed thickly. His throat felt incredibly dry, and he realized he had been panting. Charles let out a choked moan, his motion stuttering a little. Groaning, Erik hoisted Charles up a little higher; he had been steadily slipping the more they thrusted against each other. As Charles tightened his hold around his neck, Erik took over, picking up the speed.

“Oh god, Erik,” Charles breathed. He kissed Erik clumsily, licking open-mouthed at his lower lip.

“Nnngh,” Erik replied incoherently.

The warmth pooling at the base of his spine was almost overwhelming. They both just needed something more: a little more friction or something, and they would both be toppling over the edge. And that’s when Charles moved one of his hands from Erik’s shoulder to down below the water, gripping them both. Erik moaned loudly, breaking away from Charles’ mouth to drop his head on his shoulder, breathing heavily. His hips snapped even more quickly, chasing the tight grip of Charles’ fist. Every part of his skin touching Charles seemed to crackle with pleasure. With his head on Charles’ collarbone, Charles’ mouth was right next to his ear, and when the other man gasped and keened again, and Erik was completely lost.

He cried out, his hips twitching forward once, twice more, then he was cumming, his back bowed as he chased the feeling of bliss ricocheting through his body. He was just returning back to reality when Charles moaned loudly, shuddering against Erik for a moment before collapsing, boneless, on top of him.

Erik staggered slightly. Although Charles was much lighter than he would have been if they weren’t in the water, his orgasm had left him weak-kneed. Still, he somehow managed to drag them both back to the shore before dropping down in a heap next to their clothes.

Charles curled up against his side immediately. “So,” he began quietly after a moment’s pause, an amused lilt to his voice. “You’re Jewish?”

“Mmm?” Erik asked, draping an arm across Charles’ shoulders and carding his fingers through his floppy, damp hair.

“It’s a religion,” Charles replied sleepily. “Something people believe in. I’ll tell you about it later. No lessons now.” He snuggled closer, nuzzling gently at the column of Erik’s throat. There was a short silence, and then he added, almost so quietly Erik couldn’t hear, “Will you stay the night again?”

Erik didn’t even have to consider. “Yes,” he said, dropping a kiss to Charles’ temple. “Of course.”


	13. Chapter 13

Charles woke the next morning feeling oddly weightless for such an early hour. Normally he woke as late as possible, squeezing in every second of sleep he could since he usually went to bed several hours after he should have. He also usually wasn’t so nice and warm. Also, there were never any Wildmen blinking blue-grey eyes at him as he woke. Not until today, of course. He grinned.

“Good morning.”

“Good morning.” Erik smiled back.

“Were you watching me sleep?”

“Not for long,” Erik replied glibly. “But I’m glad you’re awake now. I have to go before the others get up.”

Charles sighed, stretching as much as he could in the cramped bed, Erik leaning back to accommodate him. “Alright,” he said regretfully. “I’ll walk you out.”

He rolled out of bed after Erik, and together they made their way out of the tent and to the edge of the deserted camp, their arms brushing slightly as they walked. The day seemed especially beautiful; the sky bluer and the jungle more alive than Charles had ever realized before. A slight breeze ruffled his hair and the edges of the tents, carrying with it the faintest whiff of ocean. Charles’ smile brightened, not even dimming when they reached the edge of the tree line and Erik had to say goodbye.

“I’ll be back later,” he murmured, stepping into Charles’ space and using a hand to gently tip his head up for a quick kiss.

Charles hummed in acknowledgement against Erik’s lips. “Okay,” he answered when they pulled away too soon. “See you.”

Erik grinned, cupping Charles’ cheek briefly before turning away and running off into the forest. Charles just stood there for a moment, staring at the spot where Erik had disappeared, unable to wipe the smile off his face. At long last, he decided to head back to bed. Hopefully he could catch a bit more sleep before the others woke up and breakfast was ready. He tore his gaze away from the trees, turning to head back to his tent.

He immediately froze when he saw Raven standing in the doorway of her tent, her mouth open slightly and eyebrows raised in surprise.

It was as if someone had submerged him in ice water. He felt like his insides had been ripped out, leaving him hollow, while the tiny but insistent voice in the back of his mind roared at him, demanding why he thought he could be so happy without owning up to the consequences. Desperately, he whirled through a thousand different stories he could tell Raven to explain away what she had so obviously seen, but none of them seemed plausible.

“Raven,” he began quickly, taking a hesitating step towards her. “It’s not- this isn’t-”

“I’m sorry,” Raven broke in, holding up her hands, and Charles stopped, taken aback by the lack of anger or disgust in her face and voice he just now noticed. “I’m really, really sorry. You two were so quiet I didn’t even hear you. I didn’t think anyone else was awake.”

“You… you’re not angry?” he asked, scarcely allowing himself to acknowledge the flicker of hope in his chest.

Raven laughed incredulously. “No,” she replied at once. “A little startled maybe. It’s not fun seeing your brother having a moment with his ape-man beau, I can tell you. But no, of course I’m not mad.” Her expression grew soft, and she carefully stepped closer, closing the space between them like Charles was a horse that would spook any moment. “I’d thought maybe for a while… but I always wanted you to tell me to be sure. There used to be a time when we didn’t keep secrets from each other, remember? I’m sorry you thought I wasn’t trustworthy enough to share this one with you.”

Charles let out a noise, half-laugh, half-sob, and filled with relief and disbelief. All this time he’d been so afraid of the people he loved turning him away because of the way some stupid grade-school boys and a vile stepfather had behaved. He should have known Raven would be different; she always had been the best part of him. Abruptly, he threw his arms around her, pulling her in for a tight hug, which she returned immediately. She buried her face in his neck the way she always used to when they were younger, her arms so strong around him it almost hurt, but he didn’t mind.

“I’m sorry,” he said as he blinked rapidly against the tears prickling the corners of his eyes. “I was going to tell you at some point, I just… never had the need to before.”

Raven laughed again, the noise sounding truly happy this time. “You might not have had to after another day of all this sappiness,” she said, pulling away and rolling her eyes dramatically. “The looks you two give each other. I’m surprised Moira and Shaw haven’t figured it out yet. You really do love him?”

The question- and it was more of a statement if he was being honest- took Charles completely by surprise. He opened his mouth to reply, then closed it again quickly, Raven looking increasingly smug the longer he withheld an answer. But, he reasoned, it was a very serious question.

With anyone else, he wouldn’t have given his reply so much thought, but this thing between himself and Erik was different. He felt easier around Erik. Even before, when he was wary of being caught by Raven or Moira (which, he supposed, wasn’t going to matter much now), he’d never felt scared or threatened. Erik was safe, and good, and brilliant, and wonderful, and gorgeous, and sometimes he was a smug bastard but… oh dear.

“I don’t know yet,” he said finally, a betraying grin creeping across his face. “Maybe?”

“Well,” Raven replied, smiling knowingly, “I’ll just cook breakfast while you sort that out, then.”

Charles grinned, releasing her completely so she could make her way over to the fire pit. He was almost back to his tent when he paused. “Raven?” he called quietly so the others wouldn’t hear. She turned over her shoulder, looking quizzically at him. “I mean, I know you wouldn’t, but promise me you won’t tell Moira or Shaw? Moira I’ll tell on my own, and Shaw… doesn’t need to know.”

Raven nodded, her expression turning soft. “Of course. Now go back to bed.”

He happily obeyed.

~

After breakfast, Shaw disappeared into the forest with a loaf of bread, once again intent on finding and befriending the white bird, who had flown by and squawked at them while they ate. Raven had also vanished, leaving Charles to talk to Moira alone in the research tent.

His stomach had flipped in anxiety again as he approached, asking Moira quietly if they could talk. Moira had been concerned, but as soon as Charles blurted out that he liked men, and, in fact, was involved with Erik, she relaxed immediately. Much like Raven, Moira had apparently suspected Charles’ true feelings all along.

“You’re one of my best friends, Charles. I know you too well, ” she said with a smile as she reached over and grasped his wrist companionably. “And you wear your heart on your sleeve.”

Charles grinned lightly, shaking his head. “Thank you. There is something else though,” he added, his smile now turning apologetic. “I asked Erik last night if he could take us to the gorillas. He says he can’t.”

“Why not?” Moira asked, frowning slightly and drawing back. “Doesn’t he know we need this?”

“Of course he does,” Charles replied. “It’s not that he doesn’t want to, or doesn’t trust us, it’s the silverback that leads his troop. Apparently he’s not too keen on humans, although I don’t know why he’d be more wary of us than anything else in this jungle.”

The creases on Moira’s forehead deepened as she thought, but then suddenly she brightened. “Well, you have to admit this whole trip has actually been extremely enlightening for not even having found what we came here for,” she said, still looking pensive. “We’ve learned to so much from Erik alone. What if…” she trailed off, staring meaningfully at Charles.

“What if what?” Charles asked.

“What if he came back with us?” Moira finished excitedly, leaning forward in her chair. “Surely you’ve been thinking about this too, Charles.”

Charles shifted nervously in his chair. “Well, yes, of course I have,” he answered, feeling his face grow hot under Moira’s scrutiny. “I just never thought I should ask him. I never knew how he would react. He loves his family, even if he doesn’t feel they understand him all the time. I don’t want him to think I don’t see that. And he’s not just some test subject. He’s never been that.”

“No,” Moira agreed immediately. “I didn’t mean it like that, Charles. But Erik belongs with us: other humans who won’t think he’s… well, some freak. Haven’t you seen the way he lights up whenever he learns something new about our world? Think of the people that would want to meet him, too, Charles. We could change the field of science forever. Not only that, you two could stay together.” Charles, who had been staring at the floor in thought, turned to meet her eyes. “I want you to be happy, Charles. And to be honest, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you happier than when you’re with him.”

Charles bit his lip, uncertain. “I suppose I should ask him,” he said. “Maybe he’s been wanting me to.”

“You’ll never know until you try,” Moira replied. “This jungle may be all he’s known, but there’s so much more out there. I think he’d be excited to see it.”

“Thank you, Moira,” Charles said, standing. “As soon as I can, I’ll ask him.”

Moira tossed him a grin before turning back to her journal, and Charles left the research tent.

The day was proving to be as sweet as he’d felt it would be this morning, he thought as he went over to the washbasin and began cleaning up the breakfast dishes. Perhaps he could get some general observations done before Erik came back. He needed to pay more attention to the things that weren’t Erik now that things between them had changed. After all, if Erik agreed to come back to England with them, they could spend the rest of their lives talking about life with primates.

~

The morning passed rather uneventfully. After he washed the dishes, Charles had spent several hours writing a log he’d been neglecting about the past few days- leaving certain incidents out of course. That finished, he’d wandered a bit into the forest to collect some plant samples, should they somehow prove beneficial. All the while he tried to ignore the way his heart jumped in anticipation at the slightest noise from camp; the way his thoughts automatically drifted to Erik when he wasn’t fully concentrating on cataloguing or recounting information.

By the time he returned to the tents, Shaw was cooking lunch, and Raven, Charles saw with a start, was cooing over the beautiful white bird, now trapped inside a large cage. Instantly, his good mood disappeared.

“What is going on here?” he demanded, his jaw set as he glared at Shaw and to the cage and back.

Raven, hearing his tone, turned confusedly towards him, but as soon as she saw the look on his face, she backed away from the cage, chastised. The bird inside shrieked and flapped at the bars before landing back on the small wooden perch in the middle of its prison.

Shaw was unfazed. “Mr. Xavier?”

“What are you doing with that bird?”

“I thought it was obvious,” Shaw replied with a smile. He set down the knife he had been using to cut slices of cured ham and focused his full attention on Charles. “I’ve tamed her and now I’m keeping her as a pet.”

“You can’t do that,” Charles said angrily. “This is her home, and she’s a living thing, not some prize you can snatch away.”

“What’s going on?” Moira asked, poking her head out of the research tent, no doubt alarmed by the raised voices.

“Mr. Shaw’s captured a bird,” Charles replied, still not breaking his gaze away from Shaw. “The one he’s been feeding.”

“Captured is a rather strong word,” Shaw said, stepping forward with his hands out defensively. “She doesn’t seem upset. In fact, I think she may be somewhat used to humans. She hardly squawked when I shut up the cage.”

If looks could kill, Shaw would be dead from Charles’ glare. “It doesn’t matter what you think she felt then, she’s obviously unhappy now. Let her _go._ ” He started toward the cage, ready to unlatch the door and let the poor bird fly free, but Shaw blocked his path.

“Now, now, Xavier,” he said, the glint in his eyes turning sharp and dangerous. The look reminded Charles of the one he’d given him last night, and despite his anger and the condescension in Shaw’s tone, he froze. “You don’t get to tell me what to do in this instance. This bird is now my personal property and as such you have no right to free her. I’m not a scientist, Xavier, and there’s little I expect to get out of this trip besides my pay check, so I’ll be taking the bird. I hope that’s not going to be a problem.”

Charles stood stock-still, staring back at Shaw with a mixture of disgust and unease. This speech was openly malicious, so much worse than the hints he’d dropped last night. Surely he wasn’t imagining the cold calculation somehow turned wild in Shaw’s eyes. This man was off completely. He was dangerous. Charles opened his mouth, but Shaw jumped in again.

“Besides, Frost might be an asset to your data,” he said, stepping back out of Charles’ space but still blocking the cage. “After all, we’ve seen no gorillas aside from Erik, if you can even count him. My bird might be the only other animal we come in contact with.”

There was a short, tense pause- Charles was too stricken to form a sentence- but it was broken by Moira. “That might be true, you know,” she said, taking control of the situation with ease. “I don’t like locking an animal up like this at all, but… she could be useful. It’s no different than going to animals in zoos before.”

Charles gritted his teeth. “Fine,” he spat at last; his shoulders still tense as he turned away from Shaw and the bird. “Do what you will. I’m going out for a bit.”

Without sparing a glance at any of the others, Charles stalked out of camp and towards the ocean. He was still fuming when he reached the beach, making his way so he was just out of reach of the waves before plunking down.

Locking up this poor bird was completely wrong, didn’t anyone else see? Animals weren’t meant to be caged. It wasn’t like he enjoyed seeing animals in captivity. He’d had to visit gorillas in zoos because he needed to study them in person. That was the reason he’d gone on this bloody trip in the first place: to see these beautiful creatures in their natural habitats, the way they were meant to be.

And did no one else care that Shaw was obviously up to something? Charles had no proof, of course, other than his gut feelings, but after last night and today’s display, Charles wasn’t going to trust Shaw any further than he could throw him. But trust him with what? That was the question. Was Shaw planning on doing something to them? He’d mentioned being unhappy about what he was going to get out of the trip; did he think he was somehow going to hold them for ransom? He knew Charles had money. It was entirely possible he wanted some of it for his own.

Charles was so absorbed in his own thoughts he didn’t hear the person sneaking up on him until they were right at his back. “Charles?”

Charles jumped, whirling around to see Erik looking concernedly down at him. “Erik!” he said, letting his breath out in a rush and smiling with relief. “You startled me.”

“Sorry,” Erik answered, looking apologetic. He paused. “Is it okay if I sit with you?”

“Of course.” Charles tugged on Erik’s arm, pulling him down next to him, close enough that their shoulders brushed lightly.

“Raven said you were angry,” Erik said cautiously. “Is something wrong?”

Charles chuckled humorlessly. “Well, no one else seems to think so.”

“Tell me.”

He paused for a moment, trying to arrange his feelings into words before he finally told Erik all of what he’d been worried and angry about concerning Shaw. Last night he’d held back, partly because he didn’t want to ruin the moment he and Erik had been having, and partly because he’d hoped Shaw’s aggression had just been some passing incident; they all had their off days after all.

“I’m just not sure what to do now. He’s up to something. I have no idea what, but it makes me feel sick to think about it,” Charles finished at last, letting out a sigh and leaning forward, hugging his knees to his chest.

Erik was silent for a moment. “I don’t like that man,” he said, frowning. “I never have. I’ll keep an eye on him.”

Privately Charles thought it probably wouldn’t do much good; whatever Shaw was planning he certainly wouldn’t tell Erik, and Charles doubted Erik could get the information out of him any other way. Still, he smiled appreciatively, resting a hand gently on Erik’s leg.

“Thank you,” he said, leaning in and resting his head against Erik’s shoulder.

“You’re welcome,” Erik replied, wrapping an arm around Charles to stroke gently up and down his arm. “Spend the day with me out in the jungle. We won’t go back to camp unless you want to.”

Charles’ smile widened. He pressed his nose up against Erik’s neck, his earthy, calming scent mixing in with the salty breeze off the ocean. Softly, he brushed his lips over Erik’s jumping pulse. “Okay,” he answered, pulling away and getting to his feet. “Lead on.”


	14. Chapter 14

Erik knew exactly where they were headed, even in the denseness of the undergrowth. Charles, of course did not, but he’d once again refused to swing on Erik’s back, claiming now that he could do it for himself he didn’t want to depend on anyone else. Erik had countered that he was far from comfortable letting Charles do it himself, especially when he let go of the vine out of sheer excitement and nerves the night before. So here they were, traveling the hard way, going deeper and deeper into the forest.

“I’m going to a place where you can practice swinging again,” Erik called over his shoulder. He was several feet in front of Charles, but in the thick of all the vines and giant flowering plants, it was somewhat hard to hear as well as see each other.

He heard Charles hastening forward. “Slow down a little,” Charles shouted. “I can barely see- _oof._ ” He ran straight into Erik’s back. Charles frowned, but Erik ignored him.

Instead, he stood completely still, staring off into the jungle over Charles’ shoulder, his eyes wide and his nostrils flaring as he inhaled. Something was following them. His sense of smell wasn’t as good as a gorilla’s, but he could hear it rustling just a moment before. It had stopped when they stopped.

“Erik, what-” Charles began, but Erik clapped a hand over his mouth, glaring pointedly. Affronted, Charles glared back, attempting to wriggle free from Erik’s grasp. They struggled for a moment, Erik holding on tightly and Charles fighting his grip, when a loud snapping noise uncomfortably close to Erik’s right made them both freeze.

Adrenaline began coursing through Erik’s veins. His heart was now the only thing he could hear, pulse pounding in his ears and doing nothing to help the situation. This was just like when they had first met with the leopard. The jungle was unnaturally quiet, but this time Erik was without any sort of weapon. This was so stupid. How could he have been so forgetful? He’d gotten lax with his defenses over the past few days, his thoughts almost completely consumed by Charles.

Now his brainlessness had gotten them both into trouble.

Another twig snapped, closer this time, and the bushes just in front of them began rustling. Erik whirled around so he was in front of Charles, bracing himself for whatever was about to jump out at them, and ignoring the way Charles was tugging desperately at his shoulders. The leaves rustled ominously once again, and Erik inched his feet a little further apart shifting forward slightly, ready for an impact, when suddenly a face poked out of the foliage; a very familiar face.

“ _Alex?_ ” Three more faces. “You- _god_ , you guys nearly gave me a heart attack!” Erik snapped, dropping down onto all fours out of habit and so he could be closer to yell at them. “Why didn’t you say something?”

“We weren’t positive it was you,” Sean said sheepishly, backing away half a step. “Hank said you smelled funny.”

Hank glanced away nervously, but Armando nodded. “You were making weird sounds too. And so was this one.” He started forward cautiously. “This is Charles, right?”

Erik turned, suddenly reminded of Charles’ presence now that he wasn’t so angry. Charles was standing very still, looking incredulously at Erik and the others, his mouth slightly open and his blue eyes wide. Erik felt something twist in his stomach- a sensation he was getting used to getting whenever he looked at Charles now- and he stood again, catching Charles’ gaze.

“Charles,” he said, taking Charles’ hand and pulling him gently forward. “These are my cousins. You’ve seen them before, but I don’t think you’ve met them properly.” He pulled Charles down into a crouch with him again and gestured to each of the gorillas and the elephant in turn. “This is Armando, Sean, Alex, and Hank.”

“I… hello,” Charles breathed, looking rather dumbstruck, but pleased. “Erik, did you- did you bring them here to show me? I thought you said-”

“No, no, I didn’t,” Erik cut in. He turned to the others. “Why are you all here anyway? The second you smelled him you should have run the other way.”

Hank shuffled, flapping his ears timidly. “You said we could visit as long as we didn’t go back to camp,” he said. “Logan doesn’t ever have to find out we met.”

Erik quirked an eyebrow, surprised. He opened his mouth to reply when Charles nudged him gently with his elbow, looking expectant. “I might have said they could visit us as long as it wasn’t at camp.”

Charles beamed. “Really? That’s wonderful, Erik,” he replied, turning to look at the others. “How do I say hello?”

“You mean in gorilla?” Erik asked, and Charles nodded vigorously. He smiled. “Okay.” He let out a low hooting sound, sustaining it for longer than necessarily for Charles’ benefit.

Charles tried to mimic him, “oo”ing low, but the pitch wasn’t quite right. Erik shook his head, still smiling. “No, _ooo,_ ” he directed, leaning in closer and pursing his lips a little more to exaggerate the noise. “ _Ooo._ ”

“Oohh,” Charles replied. “ooOohh.”

Not knowing what else to do, Erik gently took Charles by the chin, pulling his jaw down softly. “ _Ooo_ ,” he instructed, unable to stop the corner of his mouth from twitching upwards.

“ _Ooo_ ,” Charles said finally, pulling away with a grin so he could turn to Erik’s family, a slow blush creeping across his cheeks and making Erik suddenly wish the others hadn’t shown up after all. “ _Ooo_ ,” he said again, and Armando, Sean, and Hank all perked up, while Alex looked confused.

“He can speak gorilla?” Sean asked excitedly, bounding forward. “That’s awesome. Hi, Charles!”

“No, he doesn’t,” Erik amended quickly, but Alex, Armando, and even Hank were creeping forward now too, forcing Erik out of the way so they could poke unabashedly at Charles, who looked a bit overwhelmed, but was still smiling. Erik’s stomach flopped again. “Sorry,” he said quietly.

“Don’t you dare apologize for this,” Charles replied immediately. His grin was so bright it almost hurt for Erik to look at, but at the same he couldn’t pull his gaze away. “Thank you, Erik. This is brilliant. I can’t… Erik, this is really amazing.”

“Why is he wearing so many coverings?” Hank asked, using his trunk to tug at Charles’ shirtsleeve. “He must be stifling.”

Sean was investigating Charles’ hair, which Charles was enduring with extreme tolerance, Erik thought. “His fur is really soft,” Sean remarked. “And clean. There’s, like, no bugs here.”

“Is that why you cut your hair short, Erik? To be like him?” Darwin asked, sitting back on his hind legs to better examine Charles’ face.

“Guys, look!” Alex said excitedly, holding up one of Charles’ hands and wiggling his own fingers. “Just like Erik!”

Erik’s grin dimmed slightly, then faded all together, and he had to turn away, blinking at the sudden prickling at the corners of his eye. Charles, however, must have noticed his sudden change in mood. “What did he say?” he asked quietly.

“Nothing,” Erik answered, shaking his head before looking back up and meeting Charles’ gaze. “He just said how we’re alike, is all.”

Charles’ expression grew soft. “You’re not alone, Erik,” he said, looking at him with such intensity the whole troop and all of Hank’s herd could have come trampling through the jungle and Erik wouldn’t have noticed. “Not anymore.”

~

That night, after the others had retired to bed, Charles led Erik by the hand to his tent. Erik made no protest, already oddly at ease with their new sleeping arrangements. He happily put on the pajama bottoms Charles tossed to him and crawled wordlessly under the covers when they were both dressed, happy to see that Charles had forgone a top. Once Charles had mostly settled, he wrapped his arms around the shorter man’s waist, tangling their legs together and drawing him in as close as possible.

“Thank you for today,” Charles mumbled against Erik’s collarbone, his breath tickling slightly. “Your cousins are very nice, if a bit...”

“Excitable?” Erik supplied, and Charles laughed.

“Yes,” he allowed, tipping back his head slightly so he could grin wickedly up at Erik. “Although I have to say, I think that runs in the family.”

Erik arched an eyebrow in mock innocence, but leaned down to capture Charles’ lips all the same. They kissed languidly for a moment before Charles opened his mouth in a silent request, Erik enthusiastically slipping his tongue inside to lick gently at Charles’ own. A soft moan escaped Charles’ throat, and Erik felt his pulse race a little bit faster. Almost unconsciously though, Erik decided against quickening the pace. While their frantic coupling the night before had been wonderful, Erik felt the need to draw this moment out just a little longer.

All day, especially since Alex, Sean, Armando, and Hank’s unexpected visit, Erik had wanted Charles like this; pliant and warm in his arms. Something about it felt absolutely right, and this conviction grew with every kiss, every touch, every _look_ they shared. Erik didn’t trust himself to find the right words to tell Charles in English what he felt, so he tried to say it with the gentle glide of his tongue, the soft press of his lips. He slid a hand up Charles’ neck, cupping his jaw as he pulled away briefly for breath, still nuzzling at Charles’ mouth.

Charles inhaled raggedly, clutching suddenly at Erik’s shoulders, sliding his fingers up into the hair at the nape of Erik’s neck. His erection was digging into Erik’s hip, but Erik ignored both their arousals for the time being. Instead, he kissed Charles firmly once more before rolling to cover him, sliding his mouth along his jaw, nipping his way along the soft skin until he got to Charles’ ear, where he drew the lobe into his mouth briefly, eliciting another quiet keening noise. The sound made Erik smile.

Pausing for a moment to collect himself, Erik nosed at the beginning curve of Charles’ jaw before continuing slowly downwards. The slow drag of his tongue down the length of Charles’ neck made the fingers tangled in Erik’s hair tighten just on the right side of painful. Erik hummed contentedly, biting down lightly on the jumping pulse point his tongue had been trailing along. Below him, Charles gasped, arching against Erik, his hips bucking upwards, desperate for friction.

Erik pulled back slightly, but he only had a second to admire the way Charles looked; beautiful, of course, back bowed and eyes closed so tightly his nose was even scrunched up. Then those eyes were flying open, the bright blue a thin circle around giant pupils, and Charles looked at him with unrestrained want before pulling him down and crashing their mouths together once more. He worked them both out of their pajama bottoms while Erik took over the kiss.

“I really don’t know why we bothered with these in the first place,” Charles panted against Erik’s lips as he kicked his clothing off to land on top of Erik’s next to the bed.

“You wear too many clothes,” Erik agreed breathlessly. He dropped a kiss to Charles’ cheek before reaching down to wrap his hand around them both, but Charles stopped him, clasping his fingers gently around Erik’s wrist. Erik looked up at him questioningly for a moment, slightly hurt, but the look on Charles’ face instantly chased away any fears.

“Could I… could I maybe try something different for you tonight?” Charles asked quietly, biting his lip and gazing so innocently up at Erik that there was no way he could refuse him even if he wanted to. Erik could only nod dumbly back, swallowing thickly. Charles smiled. “Here, lie on your back.”

There was a fumbling moment where they switched positions, trying not to accidentally elbow or knee each other in the semi-darkness. Then Erik was the one flat on his back on the tiny cot, Charles resting between his legs, his head propped just above Erik’s sternum on one hand. For a moment all Erik could do was stare down at Charles, drinking in the dark flush stealing over his cheeks and migrating down his neck towards his chest the longer Erik watched. He smiled and bit his lip again, but he stared back just as intently.

“Are you comfortable?” he asked after a pause, a mischievous glint in his eye as he ghosted one hand down the jut of Erik’s ribs, his fingers dipping gently into the spaces between them. It tickled slightly.

Erik made a noise of affirmation, sinking a little further down into the mattress. “Good,” Charles replied, sliding down Erik’s torso with purpose. “Promise me you’ll keep quiet? I don’t want the whole camp to hear us.”

Erik nodded automatically, then paused. “Wha?-nnghh.” His question turned into an incoherent gurgle the second Charles’ mouth closed around his cock. Reflexively, his hips bucked upwards, but Charles held them down with one strong hand, bobbing gently before pulling off completely.

“Shh,” he chided softly. He licked a stripe from base to tip, and Erik’s head fell back against the pillow as he gritted his teeth to keep from crying out. A strangled groan escaped him instead, and he could _feel_ the smile Charles had to fight off before swallowing him again.

Keeping quiet was almost impossible when Charles seemed determined to take him apart piece by piece. Not knowing what else to do, and because he desperately needed to grip something, Erik balled his fists in the thin mattress cover, biting back another loud moan when Charles pulled almost all the way off, swirling his tongue around the head and tonguing the slit before plunging down once more.

The length that Charles couldn’t fit in his mouth he had wrapped his hand around, and the firm strokes combined with the warm, slickness of his mouth were quickly driving Erik towards the brink. He wanted to say something (quietly), to let Charles know how much he was enjoying this, but as soon as he managed to open his eyes and look down, he slammed them shut again, his head falling back onto the pillow with a quiet moan. The image of Charles- blue eyes sparkling and lips red, so so _red_ \- danced behind his closed eyes, etched into his brain like a brand. 

“Charles,” he whispered, barely audible for fear that Charles would stop.

Vaguely, Erik realized that the bed was trembling slightly as Charles rutted against the bedclothes, a fact which only made the warmth stretching through his limbs that much more intense. Charles hummed in acknowledgement, sending sparks to burst in Erik’s vision.

“Charles,” he rasped again quiet enough, he hoped, that Charles wouldn’t stop. “Charles, _please_.”

The hand wrapped around Erik disappeared, and Erik couldn’t help but buck upwards again. Charles moaned, Erik’s cock almost hitting the back of his throat, and suddenly Erik couldn’t hold back any longer. His orgasm crashed over him so hard he had only just managed not to shout, gasping in a lungful of air through his open mouth instead. Charles stayed with him, swallowing, and making Erik’s hips twitch forward. Only when Erik collapsed, boneless, back down onto the bed, did Charles finally pull off completely.

He wiped the back of his hand across his mouth before smiling blindingly at Erik. “Was that okay, then?” he asked, although the smugness in his tone betrayed him.

In lieu of a verbal reply, Erik grinned, tugging him gently upwards so he could kiss him deeply. There was an odd taste in Charles’ mouth now, but when Erik realized what it must be, he simply moved his hands from the other man’s jaw to tangle in his hair, holding him in place. Charles, of course, was content to stay.

After a few moments like that, however, they had to pull away for air. Charles nipped lightly at Erik’s bottom lip once more before breaking the kiss and resting their foreheads together instead. Gradually, Erik’s heart began to slow back down to a normal rate, his breaths evening out until his chest rose and fell less frenetically. Charles kissed him gently one more time, and then slid off him to the side so he could rest his head on Erik’s chest. Erik went to move his legs together so Charles could have more room, but the backs of his thighs ran over something sticky and he jerked away.

“Sorry,” Charles mumbled a little sheepishly as he nuzzled closer. “We should probably take the sheets off.”

“Mm-mm,” Erik grumbled, burying his nose in Charles’ hair. “Leave it. Don’t want to get up.” He could feel Charles smiling against his skin, content not to argue. Short, strong fingers slid up Erik’s neck, carding gently through his short hair, and Charles tipped his chin up for another soft kiss.

“Erik,” he breathed when they broke apart, bumping their noses together in a sort of half Eskimo kiss. “I… this is all moving rather fast.” He chuckled softly, and Erik could feel his breath ghosting over his lips. “Not that that’s a bad thing, or that I mind. I hope… I hope you don’t?”

“Why would I mind?” Erik asked, letting his head fall back against the pillow again to better look at Charles. The other man looked slightly nervous, which surprised him. One of his hands was resting on Charles’ shoulder, and he began stroking his collarbone idly with his thumb, soothing over the skin.

Charles flashed him a smile, but it was gone the next moment, replaced by such an earnest expression that Erik sat up, ready to ask what was the matter, when Charles spoke suddenly again. “Will you come home with me?”

“Home? We _are_ home.”

“I mean to England,” Charles clarified quickly, scooting a little closer. “We’re leaving soon. The boat will be here in- God- _two weeks_ , and I know this is your home, I know that. But there’s a whole world out there waiting for you, Erik, a million times bigger than this strip of jungle. Those things- the pictures you’ve seen on the projector- you could see them in real life: cities, and castles, and the Grand Canyon. The Taj Mahal! Erik, we could meet the King. Everyone would want to see you. Doyle, that writer you like so much, he’d love to meet you.”

Seemingly perturbed by Erik’s silence, Charles shifted so there was less than a foot between them, resting a hand on Erik’s chest just above his heart. “We’d be together,” he whispered a little brokenly, and Erik could see the beginnings of tears shining in his vivid blue eyes. “No one would care what we did. If we lived together. It wouldn’t matter. People would barely even bat an eye. I-” he cut himself off, dropping his hand, and biting his lip angrily as he broke his gaze away from Erik to look down at his crossed legs instead.

The tent was silent for a moment, Erik completely overwhelmed and speechless, and Charles apparently trying to gather his thoughts. A moment later, he looked up again, but the smile he offered Erik didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I know this has been moving rather quickly, and I don’t want to… overstep my boundaries or… or something. But I. Well, I mean.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t think I want to be away from you if that’s okay,” he admitted, and now the smile was genuine, almost blinding. Erik’s heart seemed to forget how to beat for a moment. “I think I want you to come back with us more than I’ve ever wanted anything.”

Erik opened his mouth, then promptly closed it, still not quite sure how to respond. He wanted to be with Charles so much; as much as Charles wanted to be with him. Learning that the feelings were mutual, hearing it said out loud, made him so happy Erik thought he felt like jumping and dancing around the entire camp. But after two short weeks, being together would come with a price, and Erik wasn’t sure he was ready to sacrifice what Charles was asking of him. That thought made his stomach sink unbearably, so he stayed silent for another long moment, warring with two feelings so completely opposite he had no idea how to reconcile them.

He had apparently been quiet for too long, however, because tears were once again beginning to well up in Charles’ eyes as they stared silently at each other. Charles, noticing how leaned into Erik he was, sat back and opened his mouth, clearly about to backpedal furiously, but Erik cut in before he could speak.

“Charles,” he said, laying his hand atop one of Charles’ on the quilt still covering their legs. “I don’t want you to leave. I want to stay with you.” Charles smiled cautiously up at him, and he forced himself to continue. “But this is my home. My family is here. My _mother_ is here. I couldn’t leave her all alone, or any of my friends. Is there a way…? Maybe we could go to England one week then come back the next-”

“That isn’t how it works, Erik,” Charles broke in, sounding angry and upset and hurt. “It’s… we might be able to come back once or twice but-”

“Once or twice?” Erik interrupted too loudly this time, and Charles flinched. Kicking himself, Erik reached forward, catching Charles’ forearm before he could pull any farther away. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I’m so sorry. I’m just… very confused. I want to stay with you, Charles, so, _so_ badly.” Unable to help himself, Erik moved his hand up to Charles’ neck, his thumb just brushing along the jut of his jaw. “I only thought you were going to stay with me. We wouldn’t have to hide here. There’s no one to answer to; not even Logan, if we were together. Raven could stay too, and Moira. If I talked to my family… if they saw that the people like me are harmless…” He trailed off.

“I couldn’t ask Raven or Moira to stay for me, Erik,” Charles said quietly, leaning into Erik’s touch all the same. “And I have a life back at Oxford. I have work I’m doing there; that I’m supposed to be doing here. There’s a whole estate I technically have to manage. Erik, I’m _rich_ , did you know that? There are stocks and investments that I have to… I can’t just…” And then he fell silent as well.

“Can we,” he began at last. “Can we just ignore all that for tonight? We’ll sort it out later. Think of something in the morning when we’re not both so riled up. I don’t want to spoil tonight any further by lingering on it.”

Erik did not want to drop the matter now, but he also didn’t want to force Charles’ hand. That would certainly do neither of them any good, so he tamped down his impatience as best he could and nodded.

With Charles in his arms again, kissing him once almost shyly before settling back down against his chest, Erik found himself calmer. Someone was going to have to give at some point, but for right now, just savoring Charles’ gently evening breath dancing across his skin was enough. Two weeks. That was plenty of time to convince Charles to stay. And if it wasn’t… Erik pulled Charles just a little closer, resting his nose against his temple and forced the thought away as sleep slowly overtook him.

But the rest of the week passed without any progress on either front. Charles was still stubbornly sure that Erik would be happier traveling the world and finding people he fit in with, while Erik was absolutely convinced that Charles belonged here with the rest of his family, where they wouldn’t have to hide from everyone. Neither would break, even though they were both bending. They tried to enjoy each other’s company, but the weight of time was impossible to forget, and when they were alone, their kisses steadily became more frantic and less tender.

With five days left before the final decision had to be made, Erik spent the night with Charles, as he often did, slipping fitfully into slumber.

He woke, however, to an unexpected boom loud enough to rattle the bed. Immediately, he bolted upright, blinking quickly against the sudden brightness of morning.

“Wha-” he began, but Charles, who was already apparently wide-awake and staring at him with a mix of sadness and something like dread, cut him off.

“The boat,” he breathed. “It’s here early.”


	15. Chapter 15

Shaw had already gone down to the beach by the time Charles and Erik threw on clothes. Moira and Raven were so startled by the boat’s sudden appearance that they hardly batted an eye when the two men exited Charles’ tent together. Breakfast was a tense affair. Hardly a word was spoken between the four of them as Charles boiled water for tea, and cracked eggs mechanically over the frying pan. They were only halfway through the meal when Shaw returned with just under a dozen swarthy looking men in tow.

Then the packing began. Charles put his foot down, saying that until he spoke to the captain about prolonging their stay, none of their personal belongings would be packed. Shaw, surprisingly, agreed, and the bedroom and bathroom tents stayed upright. That being said, there was still the research tent to be packed, and the kitchen supplies, minus the table. Food would be cooked on board the ship and brought down now, Shaw explained to them all when Charles started to protest that too. 

It was a gloomy processs watching the encampment, which had always seemed rather large and homey, fall apart around them. With every new box of equipment closed up, every piece of furniture hauled off to the waiting ship, Erik felt his heart sink a little further. He and Charles had barely had time to talk this morning, but it was clear they had reached the breaking point. One of them was going to have to bend, probably within the next twenty-four hours, and Erik was feeling more and more certain it was going to be him. They’d never had a chance to discuss staying with Raven or Moira, and it was clear Charles wouldn’t leave his sister for the world.

Erik thought he could leave. It would be painful, but he could do it; more painful would be leaving Charles, and the others too. Saying he _belonged_ in the human world was a bit of a stretch though, he thought. After all, he’d survived most of his life without it. He knew where he wanted to be though, and that was by Charles’ side. Deep in his heart, Erik knew if he stayed and let Charles sail away from him it would be the worst decision of his life.

But Charles had barely kept eye contact with him all day, much less spoken to him. He was too busy telling the sailors what to move and what to leave, packing up the research tent with Moira, and, whenever he could, trying to wheedle out of Shaw exactly why the boat had arrived five days before it was supposed to. Erik had been rather caught up in the whirlwind of movement, mostly helping Raven wrap and pack the dishes, but he so badly needed to talk to Charles about what they were going to do. Charles’ refusal to pack personal belongings had given him hope, but now Erik was starting to grow uneasy again.

The afternoon meal was sandwiches, brought to shore by the ship’s captain, Azazel; a rather oily looking man with dark hair, his skin red and raw from a life spent on the ocean. In the short lull after eating, Erik hoped to steal Charles away for a moment, but Charles wolfed down his food and immediately sought out the captain to ask about the sudden arrival, giving Erik nothing more than a brief smile that did not quite reach his eyes, and a gentle, subtle brush of a hand against his arm as he walked past. Soon afterwards, Moira commandeered him to help another sailor (whose leg, Erik realized with a start, was made of wood) carry the chemistry set down to the beach.

The ship, when he saw it swaying gently in the waves several hundred yards out to sea, was both impressive and intimidating. Had it not been a direct symbol of the looming choice before him, he might have enjoyed it more; maybe even asked to climb in the small passenger boat with the boxes and ride back to the ship to explore.

As it was, Erik couldn’t bear the sight of the giant, hulking monster, its metal exterior so discoloured by the wear of the sea that it looked almost sickly. He turned back to the camp as soon as the chemistry set was safely stowed away, not waiting to see if the sailor he’d helped was following. The path was so familiar he didn’t have to look up as he walked, instead watching the sand underneath his feet turn into dirt and then grass.

“Erik!” Charles’ voice suddenly broke his thoughts, and his head snapped up, his heart automatically skipping a beat when he saw Charles standing just at the top of the small hill he had been climbing.

“Charles?”

The other man smiled, genuinely this time, and rushed forward to wrap his arms around Erik. “I hoped I’d find you alone out here. If you weren’t I was going to make some excuse and spirit you away,” he muttered against Erik’s neck. “I’m so sorry. I’ve wanted to talk to you all day, but there’s just been so much going on, and I wanted to find out why they’re here to early and make them stay another week, because they _said_ that’s when they’d come and I’m not… we’re not ready.” Instead of pulling away, like Erik expected, he only held on tighter.

“I’m sorry,” he said again, this time so quietly Erik could barely hear. “This was not how I wanted this to happen.”

“And what exactly is ‘this?’” Erik asked, pulling away slightly so he could catch Charles’ eye. “We have to decide something, Charles, and I think it has to be today.”

Charles looked down again, loosening his grip on Erik a little. “Yes,” he replied after a pause. “I tried talking to the captain but he won’t listen. He says the sooner he gets his shipments back to England the sooner he’ll get paid. We’re not a priority. Erik…” he looked up, his blue eyes shining slightly with the pent-up emotion starting to creep into his voice. “I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want to.”

“But…?”

“But… Erik, I can’t just spring this on Raven and Moira. I can’t ask them to stay and I can’t just give Raven all that responsibility if they refuse,” he said, breaking free of Erik’s hold at last, exasperation and frustration evident on his features. “Especially when she assumes you’re coming with us- when everyone does! I’m not… that doesn’t mean that you _should_ ,” he added, his expression softening. He rested a hand gently on Erik’s forearm. “Whatever decision you make, it should be because of what you want, not what anyone else wants. Not even me.”

The slightest frown creased Erik’s brow. He searched Charles’ face for a moment, seeing nothing but heartbreaking earnestness. “And what is it that you want?” he asked, dreading the answer that he knew he’d receive.

Charles smiled sadly. “I want you,” he said simply. “But I want you to be happy.”

“That’s not helping,” Erik replied. He could feel tears stinging at the corners of his own eyes and blinked rapidly against them.

Suddenly, Charles made a quiet, broken sound, and moved his hand from Erik’s arm to wrap around his neck, bringing him down for a soft kiss. Erik tightened an arm around Charles’ waist pulling him close again as Charles nipped lightly at his lips before opening his mouth, deepening their embrace. The whole thing was desperate; pleading and apologetic in equal measure, and Erik knew- if he hadn’t known before- that he was completely lost.

“Charles,” he managed finally, and Charles reluctantly pulled away just far enough to see Erik. “I… I need to talk to my mother. I might not be back tonight, but promise you won’t leave without me?”

The smile Charles offered him was blinding, even with the threat of tears still shining in his eyes. “I promise,” he said immediately, taking Erik’s face gently in his hands and giving him one last lingering kiss. “I… I’ll see you later, then.”

“Later,” Erik agreed, pressing his lips to the corner of Charles’ mouth quickly as he extracted himself from his embrace. He started off towards home, tossing one last glance back to where Charles stood watching him before taking a deep breath and disappearing into the jungle.

~

The closer he got to the nests the further Erik’s heart began to sink. He’d started off swinging from vine to vine, but not even halfway home he’d had to switch to walking; his limbs felt too heavy and he was too distracted to safely throw himself through the air. His mind whirled with what he was going to tell his mother. No more hiding, he’d decided, not when this might be the last time he saw her for a very long time, if ever again. He wanted to tell her about how he’d found his people and learned their language and the way they lived. He wanted to tell her about Charles, and how he never wanted to wake up to anything but the sight of him tousled and peaceful with sleep.

It was going to be the hardest thing he’d ever had to do, but it would be worth it, it would, if it meant he could stay with Charles. 

He reached the clearing where his family had been staying for the past few weeks. They’d stayed here before, when he was much younger. It was a good spot, close to fresh water and the termite mounds, with access to lots of good fruit, and far enough away from other predators or encroachers. Erik had always felt safe here, but he tried to banish those thoughts now as he looked around for his mother. She was not in her nest, but it was rare she ever strayed far from it, so she had to be close.

At last he spotted her on the other side of the encampment, perched on a tree that hung out over an abrupt drop down into the valley below. She was facing away from the circle of nests, staring intently out over the landscape, watching as the beginnings of a rainstorm began to block out the sun over the mountains in the distance. It was probably a good idea Charles had insisted they keep their tents standing. 

Erik made his way slowly over to her, silently creeping along the tree trunk until they were sitting side by side, watching the jungle together. He rested his head on her shoulder, feeling her soft fur against his cheek and swallowing hard. 

“It’s going to be cold tonight,” Edie said quietly, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and dragging him in closer. “I’d prefer it if you didn’t stay out.”

Erik took a deep breath, blinking quickly. “Mama, there’s something I have to tell you.”

Edie seemed to notice his tone because she froze for a moment before the arm around Erik’s shoulders shifted and she ducked her head, catching his eye. “Erik, what’s the matter?”

“I lied to you,” he said quickly, shrugging out of her hold. He sat back on his feet, looking steadily at her, noticing the way her forehead creased with worry and frustration, “when I said I was going off by myself. Please don’t be angry but those others, the people like me, I’ve been learning about them. They taught me how to speak their language and just... how to live with them.” 

The more Erik spoke the more his mother’s face fell. His heart constricted painfully, but he had to tell her. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I’d hoped you wouldn’t have to find out about it- or, no- I didn’t want to keep lying to you. I just hoped...” He took a deep breath before continuing haltingly. “Mama… There’s someone in their troop. I didn’t expect to meet anyone like him ever. I thought I was going to be alone my whole life and I’m not; there are others like me, and he showed me that! But it’s so much more, too. He’s...” 

He broke off, trying to find the right words. “We fit,” he said finally, watching his mother’s face closely as she began to process what he was saying. “I like being around him. He’s smart, and kind, and gentle, and he loves this jungle and everything in it. He’s not like what Logan says humans are at all. His sister and his friend aren’t either. They’re good. If you love me you’d have to love them too.”

A silence stretched between them in which Erik refused to let his resolve crumble. Even if his mother didn’t accept his choice, he’d already made it and he would not turn back. Eventually Edie, who had resumed staring off into the distance as soon as Erik finished, looked back at him. She was smiling, he was relieved to see, but the expression didn’t quite reach her eyes. She was trying, though, and for that Erik was infinitely grateful. 

“You’re quite smitten, then?” she said, and he laughed, nodding. Her smile widened. “So what’s his name?”

“Charles,” Erik replied immediately.

“Charles,” Edie repeated, the word sounding odd, like she couldn’t quite wrap her mouth around it. “That’s an odd name.”

“It’s a human name,” Erik replied a little defensively. “Like mine.”

Edie held up her hands in defeat. “Alright, alright. I’m sorry. So, do I ever get to meet this boy of yours?”

Just like that, Erik’s heart felt like it had been torn in two. It must have shown on his face, because his mother was suddenly crouching forward, looking almost alarmed at his expression.

“Erik, what is it?” she asked.

“They’re leaving tomorrow,” he said quietly, “and they want me to go with them. There’s so much to see, Mama, you wouldn’t believe. But most importantly I’d be with Charles. I love you.” He started forward and wrapped his arms around her tight, feeling like a child again, small and scared. “I don’t want to leave my family, but there isn’t another option. I can’t lose him yet.” There was a pause, and Erik swallowed thickly, willing his voice not to waver. “Please tell me you understand.”

“I understand,” Edie said after a pause, a soothing hand running over his back. For a moment they were both silent. Erik was trying to memorize feeling of his mother’s arms around him, her fur soft and warm, and her hands strong and comforting. Suddenly, she spoke up again. “I suppose, since you’re being so honest with me there’s something I should tell you too. Something I should have told you a long time ago, actually.”

Erik looked up at her questioningly, but she just gave him a rueful smile in return. “Come with me.”

He followed her out of the circle of nests, through the forest towards the ocean. The closer they got to the beach the more he wondered if he should warn her about the others and the boat waiting offshore, but he thought better of it. She would scent any danger anyway, and even though Erik had spoken for the goodness of Charles, Raven, and Moira, he knew better than to think his mother would automatically trust any human she happened to smell. Thankfully, a little ways before the beach they took a sharp turn in the opposite direction of the camp and continued further on that way into the jungle.

Finally, when Erik was about to pipe up and ask where she was taking him, they suddenly burst out of the undergrowth and into a clearing. A little ways away, Erik could hear the call of seagulls, and he could smell the salt of the ocean on the breeze. What was focusing most of his attention, however, was the giant structure built in the branches of a giant ceiba. It looked almost exactly like the picture Charles and Moira had shown him of a log cabin, except it was much more dilapidated and there was no chimney and, of course, it was in the air.

“Come on,” his mother said, urging him forward from where he stood rooted to the spot. She led the way climbing up, up, up though the close set of branches until finally, they reached a little landing out in front of the house.

It was getting quite dark. The sun was turning the waves burnt orange with its final rays, and the windows of the house were shut tight, keeping out what little light there was. Erik was wary of going inside, but again, his mother urged him on, this time with a gentle hand pushing against his back. Taking a deep breath, Erik flung the door of the house as wide as he could and together they disappeared into the house.


	16. Chapter 16

The house had been abandoned for some time, apparently. From the dim light filtering in through the doorway, and tiny cracks in the windows, and gaps in the roof, Erik could see how the tree had reclaimed itself. Errant branches forced their way through one window on the far-right wall. Another one was forcing its way through the a side of the floor on the left, and everywhere there was moss creeping across the floorboards and the ruined remains of… was that furniture?

Erik cautiously made his way into the room and saw, as his eyes adjusted, the tattered remnants of a mattress pressed up against the wall in front of him. Birds must have picked out most of the stuffing for their nests, and what was left over was covered in plant life; deep pink flowers closed themselves against the night. Something about the whole scene was eerily familiar, like some half-remembered lullaby.

“Did someone live here?” he asked, walking a little further into the house, turning back over his shoulder to address his mother, who was standing just inside the doorway.

“A long time ago,” she said quietly, nodding.

Confused, Erik took a step towards the windows on the left, intending to let a little more light in, but something under his foot gave a loud crunch and he jumped back in surprise. “What was that?” He bent down and picked the thing up, recognizing it as a picture frame in the darkness.

Flipping it over to show the picture side. The glass was cracked in two from when he’d stepped on it, but he could still make out the outline of some figures underneath the crack and the dust. He wiped the grime away with his hand and shuffled a little closer to the doorway and his mother. The picture came a little clearer into focus as he got nearer to the light. “Is this who lived here before?” he asked.

His mother only nodded again, an odd, sad expression on her face. She looked as though she was about to cry. With creeping unease he glanced around the room again, noticing a small structure with barred sides in the corner by the door. A dark blue blanket was hanging over the edge, as if it had been flung away abruptly, and inside was another overgrown mattress. It looked like it was a bed built for a small child, or even a baby; the bars must be so it wouldn’t roll out at night and hurt itself. The sinking feeling washed over Erik again, and he moved back towards the light and his mother, looking down at the picture in his hands.

It showed a small family: a man, a woman, and a baby. The two adults seemed young, probably around Erik’s age. The man was standing tall and proud behind the woman, who was sitting up equally straight, the baby in her arms turned toward the camera, its eyes bright and mouth open in what must have been a happy squeal. The parents were doing their best to look stoic, but their eyes were bright and crinkled just a bit at the edges as if they were about to smile at the noise their child was making.

But that wasn’t what was making Erik stare, transfixed, at the photo. It was impossible, but it was almost as if…

Take that man’s thin lips, the gentle waves of his hair, his strong jaw, his broad shoulders and his cinched waist; take that woman’s high cheekbones, her sharp, straight nose, the gentle crinkle of her eyes- which Erik couldn’t help but think were the same blue-grey as his own. If you added them all up… well.

Combine them all together and it would look exactly like… exactly like _him_.

He almost wanted to drop the picture, but he couldn’t stop staring.

“I found you here twenty-four springs ago,” his mother said quietly. Erik let her voice break over him like waves against a cliff. “I used to live with another troop, but there was a sickness. It killed everyone. I’d had a son. We got away, but he was sick, and he… he didn’t make it.

“For weeks and weeks I didn’t even want to go on living. And then I heard you crying. I followed the sound of it, and you led me here. You were all alone. There was no one else. Your family-” She paused, taking a deep breath that Erik himself couldn’t quite catch. “Emma was here. She’d known them. She knew your name, and she told me. You were so tiny, so breakable, and alone. You would have died if I hadn’t found you. So I took you with me. I saved you and you saved me.”

Another silence stretched out between them, Erik still staring down at the picture of the little family, feeling as though he might be sick. A tear he didn’t even know he’d shed dropped from his cheek onto the glass, and he wiped it impatiently away. After a long while he finally spoke.

“So this is my father,” he said, staring at the man so intensely it was almost as if he was trying to bring him back to life.

“Yes.”

“And my… my…” he trailed off, clearing his throat gently to try and soothe the way it was aching. “My mother,” he said finally, the word feeling somehow strange in his mouth.

“Yes.”

“I’m not-?”

“You’re my son,” his mother said so insistently it made him finally look up. “But no. You are not exactly the same as me. And that is nobody’s fault.”

Erik swallowed hard. “I’m not part of the family.”

“You are whatever you want to be,” Edie replied gently, smiling at him even though her eyes were wet. “Gorilla, human, it doesn’t matter. It won’t change how I feel about you.”

Erik looked down at the photograph again, then back up at his mother. For a long time he just thought, the sun gradually sinking until it hovered just above the horizon. Everything he’d ever believed he was had been false. He’d never belonged here, but somehow, that’s exactly where fate had landed him. Perhaps his parents had been on an expedition like Charles. Perhaps a boat had been on its way to take them- to take _him_ \- back to civilization, but then before it could…

Slowly, Erik looked around the room again. There was what looked to be an overturned couch next to the bed, but behind him, near the crib was a chest much like the one Charles had in his tent. He went over to it, propping the photograph gently against the wall next to it carefully. Carved into the top were some letters, but Erik wasn’t very good at reading yet, and he could only make out two “e”s and two “r”s because he recognized them from the spelling of his own name, so he gave up trying to make out the word and opened the lid. 

Inside there were a few slightly musty smelling pieces of clothing. Erik drew out a dress, light blue and patterned with small white flowers, and a pair of trousers, a plain white shirt, a red vest, and an overcoat. The man’s clothes looked like they would fit him, a thought which made his heart thump hard against his ribcage.

Clumsily, like a child playing dress-up, he slid the trousers on over his legs and fastened them, slipping his loincloth down and off when he was done. The shirt he pulled on and buttoned, then tucked into the pants, like how Charles normally wore his, finally shrugging on the vest and buttoning it, then donning the overcoat. It was too much fabric. His arms felt constricted, but he ignored how uncomfortable he was. He would learn to get used to it.

“I don’t know what I want to be,” Erik admitted finally, his voice sounding croaky. “But I know where I want to go.”

Edie nodded, looking down and away from him as she did. Erik spared one last look to the couple and the baby in the photo before making his way over to her, wrapping her up in his arms and holding on tightly.

“Charles said,” Erik began shakily, “he thought maybe someday we might come back. That’s what he does, you know. Studying the jungle.”

“Really?” Edie asked, laughing a little thickly.

“I might be able to see you then.”

She smiled against his neck. “Then I’ll be waiting for you every day.”

Erik hugged her tighter, burying his face in her neck, trying to sear her scent and the feel of her holding him into his memory forever. A quiet sob escaped him, but he was quick to hold the rest in check before they could overwhelm him. “No matter where I am,” he whispered against her fur, “you’ll always be my mother.”

“And you’ll always be in my heart,” she replied.

Bracing himself, Erik took one more deep breath before pulling away. He allowed himself one last, long look at his mother’s face, cupping a hand to her cheek for a split second before pulling away. Wordlessly, he walked past her and through the open doorway, climbing mechanically down the branches of tree, and without looking back, he headed out into the jungle towards Charles.

~

The jungle seemed abnormally quiet as he made his way through it, or maybe it was just that he wasn’t quite paying attention to the sounds. Erik’s legs felt as if they were weighted down with every step he took. This was the right decision, he knew deep down. If Charles couldn’t stay with him then they would both have to leave together. But even dressed in these clothes and knowing the truth about where he’d come from, Erik couldn’t completely convince himself he didn’t belong right here, in the place he’d grown up and that he loved the most.

He was so lost in thought he didn’t realize how close to camp he was until he heard voices; Charles and Raven. He smiled. Charles had been true to his word. Unfortunately, he still sounded quiet aggravated. The voices, for now Moira was joining in, were raised almost to a shout. There was a short pause. Erik froze, taken aback by the eeriness of it.

And then a gut-wrenching scream echoed through the forest, so full of anger that Erik thought for a split second it couldn’t have come from who he thought it had, but there was no denying it. That was Charles’ voice. Instantly, Erik was sprinting through the undergrowth, nearly wiping out completely when his foot caught on a root, but he regained his balance and rushed on. Branches and vines clipped his face as he ran past, until finally he burst out into the clearing.

“Charles?” he called, heart hammering in his chest.

“Erik!”

Emma was shrieking in her cage, doing nothing to help the frantic pounding in his eardrums. “Shut up!” he whistled to her as he cast his eyes about anxiously, cursing the darkness.

“Erik was that you?” Charles’ voice drifted from the other side of camp, and finally his eyes caught movement; dark shapes moving close to the tree line, seemingly struggling against something. He ran towards them to see Charles, Moira, and Raven all sitting at the base of a tree, their hands behind their backs.

“What-?” he began, but he fell silent as soon as he drew near enough to see the rope binding their wrists together and their wrists to the tree. Immediately he crouched down to try and untie Charles’ hands.

“Shaw,” Moira said and Erik’s fingers on the rope paused for a moment in his confusion. “Shaw and the sailors. They pulled guns on us… maybe an hour ago. They tied us up, and said they were going to get the gorillas.”

It was as if Erik’s blood had turned to ice in his veins. He sat back, staring at Moira incredulously. “What?”

“I’m so sorry, Erik,” Charles said, his fingers of his hands turning towards Erik in an unconscious bid for contact. “I don’t know how he knew, but he must have followed you. After you left, when I got back to camp he wasn’t there, and I didn’t see him again until after dinner. He must’ve found out where the nests are and now he wants to capture your family. They had cages…” he trailed off, as Erik looked down and away, panic beginning to set in again.

Charles tried to inch closer, but he was bound closely to the tree, and the ropes were already cutting into his skin so roughly he was sure they were drawing blood. “I’m so sorry,” he said again, leaning as far forward as he could and ignoring the pain in his wrists and shoulders.

“I have to go warn them,” Erik said abruptly, making to stand.

“Well then hurry up and untie us so we can come with you!” Raven shouted.

Erik frowned. “No. It’s too dangerous. I don’t want you to get-”

Charles sighed in frustration. “Oh for god’s sake, Erik, there’s about fifteen of them and one of you. Stop trying to take this all on yourself and let us help you!”

For a moment that probably seemed longer than it actually was, Erik considered ignoring them and tearing into the jungle by himself. Maybe he could get to the nests before the others; if they were lugged down with cages big enough to hold gorillas it would be slow going. But the look Charles was giving him was so determined, his own stubbornness shrank under it.

He crouched again and began working on the knots securing Charles’ hands, ignoring the spike of anger when he saw dried blood caked around the fibres. After a few moments of work, however, he growled with frustration. His fingers felt slow and clumsy and the knots were too securely tied.

“I can’t do it,” he spat, clawing desperately at the bindings.

“My spear!” Raven exclaimed suddenly. “We packed away everything else but my spear’s still in my tent. It’s under my bed. Go!”

He looked at Charles, astonished, and received a bright smile in return. Needing no further encouragement, he jumped up and ran to Raven’s tent, fumbling a little in the dark, but finally finding her bed. He crouched and thrust his hand underneath it, patting around desperately until his hand closed around the long wooden handle. Faster than lightning he brought it out and ran back to the others, the carved stone tip pointed out and down, ready to sever their bonds. With one strike, he cut the rope tying them to the tree, and they all slumped forward, allowing Erik to come around and cut the ropes at their wrists more delicately. One by one, he helped them to their feet.

“We need a plan of attack,” Moira said as soon as she was standing. “We can’t just go charging in unarmed and unprepared.”

“It’s not like we had any weapons to begin with, though,” Charles pointed out as he rubbed gingerly at the bloodied scrapes that marked where the rope had dug into his skin. “And even if we did, they’d all be packed away on the boat. So there has to be some other way we-”

“Oh my-!” Moira broke in suddenly, staring at a point past Erik’s shoulder, her eyes wide and mouth open in surprise. He heard Raven gasp.

Erik spun around, real relief flooding him for the first time in what felt like ages when he saw Alex, Sean, Hank, and Armando stride into the camp. Alex looked positively livid as he bounded up to Erik.

“So you thought you could run off without saying goodbye to us?” he accused. “Your family? Your best friends?”

“We had to follow your scent just to find this place,” Sean added, angry and hurt. “We wouldn’t even have known you were leaving if your Mom hadn’t told us.”

“Armando wanted to come say goodbye to you anyway,” Alex blundered on, “but I said, ‘No! I just want to say to his face what a big, stupid, hairless wonder I think he is before he can drop us like we were nothing!’ So here we are. What are you even wearing anyw-”

Armando seemed to be the first to notice how tense a situation they’d just stumbled onto, because he rested a hand on Alex’ arm, startling him into momentary silence. “Erik, what’s going on? Is everything okay?”

“No,” Erik answered, shaking his head and crouching to better speak to them. “One of the men that came with Charles- he’s not in their troop- and he lied to us all. He tied them up” -he gestured to Charles, Raven, and Moira- “and took some of the men from the ship to go and capture our family. They want to cage them up and take them back to… back to where Charles lives.”

“What?” Armando asked, looking as hopeless as Erik had felt when he first heard. He saw the hand on Alex’s arm tightened.

“We’re going to go save them,” Erik went on, “but we need your help.”

“Of course!” Armando said immediately. “What’s the plan?”

Erik grinned, feeling bolder now all his friends were here. “Hank, how many people do you think you can carry?”

All the gorillas turned and looked at the elephant who, if he was capable of blushing, would have resembled a living fire engine.


	17. Chapter 17

Edie lay in her nest trying her best not to cry and trying not to feel the empty space next to her like a gaping wound. It had been hours since she returned to camp and told all the others, with their questioning looks at her red-rimmed eyes, of Erik’s decision to leave. Thankfully, everyone seemed to have realized she didn’t want to be disturbed, because for the rest of the evening they’d left her alone until slowly, everyone else settled into sleep.

She let out a long, steady breath and rolled over onto her side. It was silly of her to get upset, really. Erik had barely slept here the past few weeks; if she didn’t think about it she could pretend this was just like any other night. But she preferred not to kid herself. After all, it wouldn’t help anything in the long run. Blinking rapidly, she reached out to his usual spot by her side, and rested her hand where his head normally lay.

As she stared at the empty patch, however, something caught her eye a little further off. One of the large ferns growing right on the edge of the clearing was rustling gently. She propped herself up a little straighter on one elbow, squinting through the darkness. Was that Erik coming back? Had he changed his mind? She smiled, but then the plant rustled again, and the one next to it, and the next, and she realized with a sudden, sickening pang just how quiet the jungle was.

“Lo-” Her cry was cut off by a several loud bangs followed by a sizzling noise that seemed to be coming from all sides. Fire shot up suddenly from the edge of the clearing; a trail of red light hissing its way into the sky where it hovered ominously. There were several shouts from the rest of the troop as the other gorillas woke, stunned and disoriented.

Tall figures emerged suddenly from the shadowed jungle- ten or twelve at most. The scarlet lights illuminated their faces as they stepped forward, raising strange, shiny branches and tangled vines in front of them as they advanced. Edie stumbled to her feet, finally scared into action as two of the men spotted her and rushed forward, their odd weapons raised.

She cried out, dodging the swing of the silvery branch and just managing to avoid becoming tangled in the vines the other threw. Throwing herself sideways, she rolled down the small slope down to where the other nests were and started to sprint towards the other side of the clearing.

“Come on!” she shouted, shaking Jean and Ororo roughly into reality as she passed them. Out of the corner of her eye she saw movement, and turned to see seeing Anna Marie already running full-tilt towards the jungle with a gaggle of little ones in her wake. Behind her, she could hear Logan roaring even above the hissing of the lights and the shouts of the men.

“What’s going on?” Ororo asked dazedly as she practically threw her youngest over her shoulder and started to run after Anna Marie.

“Where’s Alex? And Armando? And Sean?” Jean shouted, looking around frantically.

Edie tugged at her arm, pulling her towards safety. “Not here. They’ll be fine, just-”

Anna Marie’s scream echoed across the clearing, cutting Edie off and making her heart freeze in her chest.

Whirling around, she saw Anna Marie and four of the children suspended high in the air, trapped in one of the twisted vine contraptions that the men had thrown at Edie before. No matter how they struggled, they couldn’t get free. Edie rushed forward to help, but skidded to a halt as four more men emerged from the jungle carrying a giant barred structure. They leered up at the trapped gorillas momentarily, then crept towards Edie and the rest of the troop, slow but confident.

The lights in the sky were beginning to fade, casting the clearing back in a murky half-darkness as the usually bright moon was blocked by rainclouds. Edie turned back to assess the other side of the clearing. There were more men there, but Logan seemed to have most of them occupied as he dodged everything they threw at him, still roaring and beating at the ground in anger and derision. If there was just a gap, a small gap they could get the children out through…

And then she spotted it. A little to Logan’s right, there was a spot of jungle which the men had been unable to get to. It would be risky, but as long as Logan kept holding them off, she and Jean and Ororo could get the other children to safety, regroup, and then-

Something rough encircled Edie’s wrist, and she only had a second to register the sensation of being tugged backwards before she lost her footing, stumbling until her shoulder blade collided with something hard and cold. There was a loud screeching noise, and then bars were surrounding her on all sides, caging her in.

She roared, rattling the bars of her cage and trying to grab the men who had trapped her there, but it was no use. The metal wouldn’t bend even an inch. Gritting her teeth in frustration, she turned her attention back outside, hoping that if they couldn’t help her escape, the others had at least managed to get away. But as soon as she saw the scene in front of her, her heart sank even lower. The men had managed to get ropes around Logan’s arms and neck, and six of them were holding him back as the others advanced on the rest of the troop, slowly surrounding them.

“Run!” she yelled helplessly, but it was no use. There was nowhere for them to go.

With an angry shout, she sank down to the bottom of the cage, breathing heavily. Logan had been right after all. The humans were not to be trusted. They’d done exactly what Logan had said they’d do and now… 

Well, now Edie wasn’t sure what their fate was going to be exactly. Logan had never elaborated on what happened to his childhood troop, just that it hadn’t been pretty. There were scars he still bore from it- mental and physical- but somehow he’d survived. She could only hope that some of her family would be able to do the same.

Sean, Alex, and Armando had gone. They’d be alright; they could take care of each other, even if they couldn’t help the rest of their family. Suddenly, she realized that since Erik wasn’t here helping, and there were no other humans in the area, they must have done something to him too. Panic at the thought made her bolt to her feet again, screaming and ripping at the bars with renewed vigor, vaguely aware of the shouts of the others as one-by-one they were trapped by ropes just like Logan.

And then, for one heart-wrenching second, Edie thought she heard another shout; different from the rest and definitely not gorilla but familiar all the same.

~

Charles felt his teeth rattling in his head as Hank charged through the undergrowth, Armando, Sean, and Alex hot on his trail. Raven’s arms tightened around his waist but she wasn’t burying her face in-between his shoulder blades anymore, so she must be getting used to the ride. Ahead of them, Erik was swinging from vine to vine as fast as he could, reckless with worry.

“It’s just here!” he shouted over his shoulder at the three of them on the elephant’s back. “Get ready!” And then he let out an ear-splitting, trilling shout so appalling that Charles raised his eyebrows in surprise, but he had no time to react further. They spilled out into the clearing.

The scene before them was absolute pandemonium. Erik was already in the fray, swinging down from his vine and smashing into a dumbstruck sailor that was holding one of the ropes caught around the silverback’s neck. He fell, creating a domino effect with the other man holding the same rope. The other four captors watched for a moment, dazed, until slowly, they seemed to realize with dawning horror just how slackly they were holding their ropes.

The silverback- Logan- had been just as surprised as the sailors to see Erik and the other humans, but it seemed he’d quickly recovered. With an ear-piercing roar he wrenched himself free, and the six men ran full-tilt back into the jungle.

“Shaw!” Erik yelled, looking wildly around.

Charles barely had time to make out the furious look on his face before Hank charged on, making for the middle of the nesting area where one female and several baby gorillas were pinned to the ground, caught in a net and being watched over by two more crewmen. Moira jumped down, armed with a shovel, and hit one of them hard on the back of the head, while Raven slid off the other side and sprinted towards another group of trapped children.

Everywhere there were men and gorillas running frantically, but while Charles was looking at hard as he could, nowhere could he spot the tall, lean frame of Sebastian Shaw. He was wearing bright yellow, Charles should have been able to spot him right away, but the damned man wasn’t anywhere to be seen.

Something else did catch his eye, however. Right on the edge of the clearing, two men were running as fast as they could into the jungle, a female gorilla suspended in a cage between the two of them.

“Oh no you don’t!” Charles shouted, launching himself off Hank’s back and grabbing at a nearby vine.

Even after several months in the jungle, Charles hadn’t built up much more muscle, but the adrenaline coursing through his veins meant that didn’t matter at the moment. With a shout he let go, throwing himself through the air and just managing to catch another vine. The men carrying the gorilla looked up in surprise, but it was too late.

Charles’ foot collided with the top of the cage, knocking it and the two men carrying it over. One made a small noise of pain as his head collided with a rock, but the other was luckier. He jumped to his feet, snarling and raising a fist so quickly Charles could only flinch in response, but the blow never came. 

Instead there was an aborted shout and the smack of bodies colliding. Shocked, Charles looked up to see Erik frowning down at the unconscious would-be attacker, making sure he wasn’t going to get up again. That situation taken care of, Charles rushed over to the cage, where the gorilla was pulling anxiously at the bars.

“Shh, shh, it’s alright,” he soothed, fumbling with the latch and trying to avoid the gorilla’s fingers. “Erik, come here and help me with this.”

Erik was by his side in a moment, murmuring something to the gorilla in the cage. She let go of the bars, giving them more room to work. “When I find Shaw he’s going to pay for this,” he said through clenched teeth. “The others are safe now, but he has to pay.”

Charles paused, staring astonished up at Erik. “You don’t mean…”

“This is my _mother_ , Charles,” Erik said, voice dangerously measured. “My _family_.”

Charles was momentarily taken aback. This was Erik’s mother? “Your...” he shook his head, concentrating on the subject at hand. “But you can’t-”

“Can’t _what?!_ ” he spat, batting Charles’ hands out of the way and tugging at the clasp.

“You’re not going to kill him, are you?” Charles’ voice was small, but determined.

Erik spared only a moment to stare disbelievingly at him. Then he found himself speaking. “No, of course I’m not. I just…” He trailed off, but something in Charles’ expression softened into relief. He put his hands over Erik’s on the clasp, tugging until it finally slipped free.

Together, they shoved the door of the cage out of the way and Erik’s mother climbed gracefully out of the cage, immediately clutching Erik to her. He whispered something in gorilla in her ear, smiling slowly, and Charles suddenly felt very nervous. The shouts from the nesting area had died away; as Erik had said, everyone was indeed safe. And now Erik’s mother was peering curiously at him. He swallowed and put on a very convincing smile, just as Erik took a step back out of the way, letting his mother creep towards Charles appraisingly.

“Hello,” Charles said politely. “Uh. _Ooo._ ”

“ _Ooo_ ,” she replied, creeping closer and sniffing at the air pointedly.

Erik was grinning at the both of them, his arms crossed over his bare chest- he’d shed the shirt and jacket back at camp, saying they were too constricting for swinging on vines, but he’d kept the pants. Charles wanted to do some very wicked things to get rid of the smug look on his face, but he quickly corrected himself. That was not something to be thinking about around Erik’s parent.

He didn’t realize he was staring at Erik and barely paying attention to Edie’s inspection until a sudden flash of yellow behind Erik’s turned back caught his eye. It was followed a second later by a glint of silver, and suddenly, Sebastian Shaw was stepping out from behind a tree, the barrel of his gun raised and pointing right at Erik’s mother.

“NO!” Charles shouted, tackling her to the ground as a thundering explosion echoed through the air.

Erik shouted, and for a second, Charles thought Edie’d been hit after all. There was something wet seeping across his shirt. But no, he realized. Edie was on his other side, and a sudden, insistent pain was slicing through him.

~

Erik was rooted to the spot for a long, long moment, eyes wide and disbelieving. Charles and his mother were on the ground in a heap, red slowly staining Charles’ shirt as he clutched at his side. Behind him there was the snap of a twig, and Erik spun around.

“Shaw!”

The man was standing just in front of the trunk of the closest tree, ignoring Erik as he frowned down distastefully at Charles and raised the barrel of his gun once more. He must have been hiding there, watching and waiting for his chance this whole time. Snarling, Erik threw himself at Shaw, knocking the gun out of the way just as Shaw pulled the trigger. The ensuing crack was deafening, and Shaw’s eyes went wide with surprise. Seeing his chance, Erik ripped the rifle out of his slackened grip and threw it hard against the ground. It smashed in two, the barrel still faintly smoking.

Shaw stared, disbelieving, at the broken gun. His chest heaved once, twice. Then his eyes flickered up to Erik’s. There was a fire in them that Erik had never seen before. It burned like coals so menacingly Erik flinched involuntarily back. Shaw wet his lips, took another breath, then charged full-tilt at Erik. He whipped a knife from his belt so quickly it was as though he had summoned it from thin air, and slashed at Erik’s torso.

But Erik had already dodged and was already sprinting as fast as he could towards the nearest tree. Twenty-five years of living in the jungle meant he was a strong climber, but his clothing was constricting and his hands shook, unsure, slowing him down as he scrambled up the tree-trunk towards the branches. It didn’t help that the rainclouds that had been massing all evening chose that moment to finally break, pelting him with cold, hard droplets.

Heart hammering, Erik chanced a glance over his shoulder. Shaw was right behind him, the manic look spreading from his eyes to the grin creeping across his face. He was a good climber- not as good as Erik, but good enough- but more importantly, he had a weapon and Erik had nothing. He needed to get away fast, needed to distract Shaw and get him away from the others until he could think up a better plan. Mentally, Erik cursed himself for leaving behind the spear.

Erik pulled himself up over the next branch. It was wide enough to stand on, and a quick glance to the side showed that it had vines within reach at the other end. As carefully and as quickly as he could, Erik started towards them, biting his lip in concentration. He’d almost reached the other end when there was a shout behind him, much too close to comfort.

Steps thundered along the branch, reckless and fast, and when Erik cast his glance back, he saw Shaw not five feet behind. He lunged, the knife went whistling through the air, and Erik had just enough time to dodge to the left so that the blade hit him on the arm and not the neck.

He cried out, clutching his arm, and Shaw swung again, his laughter high and cold. Desperately, Erik threw himself backwards, grabbing for the vines with his uninjured arm. By some miracle, he caught one, but once he began trying to climb, his bleeding arm screamed in protest, and Shaw’s head peeked out over the edge of the branch.

“Oh, Erik,” he said, whirling his knife absent-mindedly. “I’d say I’m sorry it has to come to this, but that wouldn’t really be true, would it? It’d be easier for you to understand if you’d been brought up normally, but the human world works a lot differently than your… lover would like to admit.”

The blade lashed out again, and Erik shouted in surprise, jumping back and grabbing another vine as the one he had just been holding snapped and fell to the ground some thirty feet below. Shaw huffed, took a quick survey of the closest vines, then jumped out to grab his own.

“You see, it’s money that makes this world turn, and nothing else. It’s really rather laughable that poor Charles didn’t see this coming, really. He could have joined in and added to that not-small fortune he already has, but he chose the bleeding heart route, and look where that’s got him. A prime example, you see, of what happens when you try to muck-up the system.” As Shaw spoke, Erik had been swinging his way further and further back, but his right arm was beginning to be a very real problem, and Shaw was steadily catching up.

“I’ve been doing this for years,” Shaw went on. “Not always with tourists, you understand. I had a business partner for a while. We’d come here on safari and bag hundreds of animals a year. We made an absolute killing- literally and figuratively. But then, of course, Stryker had to get caught poaching back in England and then he was out of the picture. So now tourists it is.”

Erik had backed up all the way to the tree trunk opposite, but no matter where he cast his gaze, he couldn’t spot another branch or vine to jump to, and Shaw was right in front of him. He was trapped. Swallowing, he looked up, seeing only more unreachable vines. Suddenly, the wheels in his head began spinning once more.

“I’d offer for you to join me,” Shaw said lazily, raising the knife, “but I think we both already know what your answer would be.”

Just before Shaw could bring the knife slashing through the air, however, Erik drew back and spat right in his face. Shaw reeled backwards, spluttering, and Erik used the opening to kick upwards, dragging the rest of the vines down with his feet so they fell on Shaw in sheets.

The expression on the other man’s face changed very quickly from surprise to anger, his face purpling in rage. Growling, he began to hack at the vines holding him back, not bothering to look at which ones he was cutting.

Erik was watching, though. He saw as the corner of the blade caught on the vine Shaw was holding. He watched as the vines around Shaw’s neck tightened, taking his weight. He was torn. A kind of self-righteous anger was roaring insistently for him to do nothing, to watch as Shaw fell to undoubtedly deserved death. But a bigger part of him, the part that sounded suspiciously like Charles and like his mother, told him to shout a warning. No matter what Shaw had done, there were punishments greater than death.

“Shaw,” he blurted out. “Shaw there’s-”

“Shut up, you useless animal!” Shaw screeched, swinging the knife high over his head. It sliced neatly through the vine in his grip.

Erik turned away, his eyes slamming shut as Shaw let loose a terrified, high-pitched scream that fell as he did. Some fifteen feet below there was a sickening crack, and abruptly, Shaw’s screams ended.

The jungle was deathly silent as Erik lowered himself down his vine just far enough to reach the closest branch. Carefully, he swung onto it and climbed the rest of the way down, breathing deeply and doing his best to ignore the body swinging gently back and forth behind him. He went as fast as he could. Charles was still injured, still needed him. There was no time to stop and think of what he’d just seen. As soon as his feet hit the ground, Erik was sprinting, casting his gaze about for the others.

“Erik!” Raven’s voice was tense with forced calm as she waved an arm high above her head, catching his attention.

His heart resumed slamming itself against this ribcage as he ran over to where she was crouched with Moira, his mother, and Armando. Charles was propped up in between them, his head and shoulders pillowed on Raven’s legs, his eyes closed and a white-knuckle grip on her hand as Moira bent over to look at his side, her face very, very serious. Erik swallowed. That was a lot of blood.

“Get back,” he said quickly, nudging Raven out of the way. It was testament to how shaken they all were that she didn’t argue with him, merely shifting automatically so Erik could slide his knees under Charles’ back instead. 

“Ahh, Erik,” Charles said dazedly, his eyes blinking open. He smiled tensely, relaxing automatically into the touch when Erik brushed a hand over his forehead, moving hair out of his eyes.

“Charles,” Erik said, his voice cracking slightly. “I’m so sorry.”

“Not your fault,” Charles replied, laughing self-depreciatingly before swallowing hard. “Although I think I’m going to pass out now if it’s all the same to you.”

He didn’t wait for a reply, his eyes fluttering shut of their own accord as he slumped fully against Erik.


	18. Chapter 18

A dull, throbbing pain in Charles’ side made him start suddenly awake. Momentarily disoriented, his heart began to race. It was dark and he was alone and he’d been shot. The last thing he remembered was pain unlike anything he’d ever felt before lancing through him, and Erik’s panicked face fading away into darkness. 

After a few long seconds, however, Charles registered the soft mattress underneath him and the warm blanket over him, and realized that he was in his own bed. There was a bandage wrapped tightly around his torso which restricted his breathing slightly as he attempted to school it into something less panicked. Although the area between his hip and his ribcage was still very, very sore, he realized he no longer felt like he was being ripped in two.

He also realized he wasn’t, in fact, alone. Two large, callused hands were clasped gently around one of his own resting on top of the blankets. They cradled it so tenderly, like it was made of glass. He smiled softly, blinking at the space next to his bed as his eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness.

Sure enough, Erik was propped up on a chair, slumped forward so his forehead rested right next to their joined hands on a tiny sliver of the cot. His face was turned towards Charles, but his eyes were still shut tight. Unable to resist, Charles reached over with his free hand and ran his fingers slowly through Erik’s hair. Almost immediately, Erik’s eyes blinked quickly open.

“Charles,” he croaked, sitting up and pulling the chair so close he might as well have been sitting on the bed instead.

“Erik,” Charles replied, squeezing Erik’s hand reassuringly.

“Are you alright? How are you feeling?” He ran the hand that Charles wasn’t holding over Charles’ face, fingers ghosting over his forehead, then moving to run across his cheek, his thumb skating across his bottom lip.

“Better,” Charles said, smiling softly. “I wouldn’t say no to some more pain relievers, though. Whatever you gave me before is wearing off.”

“Of course, of course.” Erik jumped up from his chair, going over to Charles’ trunk and coming back with a bottle of pills and a glass of water. “Moira said you can have a few of these every six hours or so. You’ve been out for about seven.”

“What time is it now?”

“Your clock says four.”

Charles made to sit up, but the pain stabbed a little more persistently and he sucked in a breath through his teeth. He didn’t have to say a word; Erik was by his side in an instant, propping him up as gently as possible, and handing him the pills and water when he was comfortable. When Charles was done and the glass completely empty, Erik took them wordlessly back, returning them to the trunk. Then he came back and resumed his seat, taking up Charles’ hand once more, raising it to his lips for a brief kiss.

“You’re so far away,” Charles said quietly. “Come here.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Erik protested weakly.

Charles resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “Then come over on my other side. Here.” He shifted further to the left, towards Erik, carefully hiding the wince as the bandages pulled slightly.

Erik only hesitated a second longer before standing up and climbing carefully over Charles’ legs to occupy the now open space. When he was settled, he immediately curled up around the smaller man, taking his hand and draping his other arm lightly across Charles’ chest, cuddling him as gently as he could. His face was buried in Charles’ neck, where he breathed in deep. When he exhaled, a small sound like a cut-off sob escaped with the breath, and Charles felt his heart give a painful tug.

“Erik?” he said, turning to try and catch Erik’s eye, but Erik just burrowed closer against him, a tear dripping off the end of his nose to roll down Charles’ neck.

“I love you,” Erik said in a rush. “I was so scared. I thought everyone was okay, and I was so… I don’t know, distracted. I was watching you and my mother and I should have noticed him- heard him or smelled him before any of this happened. And you were bleeding so much. Moira… she stitched you up, but I wasn’t sure… You wouldn’t wake up.”

Tears were beginning to run down his own cheeks too, Charles realized. He wiped impatiently at them with his free hand and held Erik tighter. “It’s okay, Erik,” he whispered. “I’m okay. I love you, too, Erik. I’m fine. We’re going to be alright.”

For several minutes they were relatively silent, the calm only punctuated by the occasional sniff or sigh as their breathing got back under control. The arm across Charles’ chest finally relaxed, and Erik pulled back just far enough so he could look at Charles’ face.

“Shaw’s dead,” he said blankly. “I didn’t kill him. He got wrapped up in vines and started cutting at them. He wasn’t paying attention. I tried to warn him, but he fell. I thought you should know.”

Charles took a moment to process this information, then nodded slowly. “That’s… well, it’s not _good_. But I’m not sorry about it,” he replied finally. “That should make me feel awful, but it doesn’t.”

“Me either,” Erik agreed. “It’s over now. I never want to think of him again.”

“I can’t argue with that,” Charles sighed, settling a little further into the mattress. Those painkillers were definitely beginning to kick in. They were starting to make him a bit sleepy as well.

Erik nodded, then leaned in and pressed their lips softly together. The kiss was slow and easy, full of comfort and tenderness. Charles threaded his fingers into Erik’s hair, but there was no pressure for anything more than the feeling of Erik’s lips moving against his own.

“I love you,” Charles said again when they finally broke apart for air.

“Mmm,” Erik hummed, resting their foreheads together. “I love you, too.”

“I’m sleepy though,” Charles added with a smile, trailing his fingers up and down Erik’s arm.

Erik snorted, giving Charles one more quick kiss before snuggling up against him again. “Me too. We should rest.” He pressed another quick kiss to Charles’ throat. “Goodnight, then,” he sighed, his breath tickling the skin he’d just kissed.

“Goodnight, love.”

~

The next time Charles woke it was light outside and Erik’s lips were brushing his temple. He moaned pitifully, shutting his eyes tight against the sun and wriggling closer to Erik, nudging him insistently with his nose. He could feel Erik’s smile as he dropped another kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“Moira and Raven are here,” he whispered roughly.

Charles’ eyes shot open and he would have tried to sit up, but Erik had already pressed a firm hand to his chest to keep him down. “Don’t sit up too quickly,” he chided, propping him up slowly so his back was pillowed against the gold frame of the headboard. When Charles was upright, Erik scooted down to the other end of the bed to give him more space. He didn’t draw away completely, though, leaving a warm hand resting on the blanket over his ankle, smoothing a circle absentmindedly over the notch of bone.

“We’re sorry to wake you, Charles,” Moira said, smiling the awkward smile that often gets offered next to sickbeds. “I need to check your bandages and make sure you didn’t rip any of your stitches last night. I’m not an expert on medicine, and it was a pretty nasty shot, but I tried my best.”

“Are you feeling okay, Charles?” Raven asked a little tremulously.

He smiled, drawing her closer so he could press a kiss to her hair. “I’m okay.”

“Good,” she answered, hugging him tightly for a moment before pulling away.

Moira smiled at him again, this time a bit more genuinely. “Let’s take a look.” 

Charles endured the whole process with grace, breathing evenly, and pointedly looking at the ceiling as Moira unwound the bloodstained bandages. She gently prodded the wound and he winced, but didn’t make any further protests, and she continued her careful examination. Finally, with a nod of approval, she picked up a first-aid box by her feet and produced from it a bottle of rubbing alcohol and more bandages. As quickly as she could, she cleaned the stitches, making Charles hiss quietly at the sting, and finished off by wrapping another long roll of gauze around his middle.

“You look fine as far as I can tell,” she pronounced, with no small measure of relief. “The new captain’s told me they need a few more days to sort everything out, so take that time to rest and you’ll most likely be ready to travel back to England.”

Charles’ face fell. He sunk a little further back into the pillows, wetting his bottom lip distractedly. Erik’s fingers, which had not stopped their soothing circles the whole time Moira was working, suddenly stilled. Neither Raven nor Moira seemed to have noticed, however, Moira too preoccupied with packing up her kit and Raven shifting her chair closer to the bed now that Moira didn’t need the space.

Glancing up, Charles caught Erik looking questioningly at him. He opened his mouth, but Charles shook his head minutely, mouthing “Later” as inconspicuously as possible. Charles had never really wanted to leave the jungle in the first place, per se. The lure of such things as indoor plumbing paled in comparison to the vast beauty of the jungle and the secrets it held that were just waiting to be discovered, but after last night especially, the thought of returning to England had transformed from being merely gloomy to almost repulsive. He didn’t want to share this with everyone right at present though. One at a time, that would be best, he thought. And Raven deserved to know first.

“Are you hungry, Charles?” Raven asked. “You slept through breakfast and it’s almost lunch.”

Charles considered for a moment. “I could eat,” he replied. “I, ah… could use some more medication as well, if that’s alright. Erik, would you mind?”

“Of course,” Erik said, getting carefully off the bed. He seemed concerned, but was luckily taking the hint, retrieving the bottle from the trunk and handing it over before saying, “I’ll make lunch. Moira?”

Moira nodded and stood, leaning down to give Charles a hug of her own. “I’m glad you’re okay,” she murmured, squeezing him tightly once more before pulling back with a soft smile and exiting the tent with Erik.

As soon as they were alone, Charles shifted further over, patting the spot of bed next to him, and Raven obligingly hopped up, sitting up against the headboard as well. He offered her a hand, which she took, putting her head on his shoulder and carefully snuggling in a bit closer. Slowly, he took a few bracing breaths before opening his mouth. He’d already made his decision, but breaking the news to Raven could be potentially very painful.

~

Erik and Moira took their time making lunch, wanting to give the siblings their space. Nevertheless, Erik couldn’t help fidgeting. The look Charles had gotten at the mention of leaving hadn’t been happy, and while Erik knew that Charles loved the jungle it was entirely possible that was the whole reason for his unhappiness, he couldn’t help but hope.

After what had happened last night, Erik didn’t think he could go through with leaving. How could he go somewhere where people would only look at him as a freak or an anomaly? Charles didn’t look at him like that. Neither did Raven or Moira, and that’s because they knew who he was. They’d spent time with him. They were his friends. But more than that, he didn’t want to live in a world where animals like his family were caged and inspected and seen only as profit.

He thought of this as Moira helped him slice up their last hunk of cheese while he cut thick slices of bread for sandwiches. As they worked, Moira explained to him that just under half of the sailors had been under Shaw’s secret employ. They’d tricked the rest of the crew below decks during dinner last night and locked them there. The tables had turned this morning when the guilty half of the crew had returned to the ship, having nowhere else to go.

“They’ll go on trial when we get back to England,” Moira said, chopping a melon in half with underserved force.

Erik hummed noncommittally. That may have been enough for Moira, but it wasn’t for him, not when the transgression was so fresh in his mind. Finally, lunch was ready and they couldn’t put off intruding on Charles and Raven any longer. Moira loaded down two plates with the cheese sandwiches and fruit salad and held them out for Erik. Wordlessly, Erik took them and headed into the tent.

Raven was beside Charles on the bed, both of them looking much more animated than before. They were speaking quietly, but as soon as Erik entered, they stopped. With a quick grin to Charles, Raven stood up, dropping her brother’s hand.

“Actually, Erik, I’ll let you two eat that,” she said, turning that knowing smile on him now. “Moira and I have some more things to discuss with the crew anyway now, I believe. I’ll stop in later.” And with that, she disappeared from the tent.

Erik raised his eyebrows. “Are you going to tell me what that was all about?”

“In a moment,” Charles said, nodding. “But first lunch. I’m actually quite famished. Come here?”

A while later, when both their plates lay clean on the floor and out of the way, Erik crawled back into bed at Charles’ request. As soon as he was settled, Charles curled on his good side so they were lying face-to-face, the mid-afternoon sun filtering in through the canvas. Automatically, he took the hand Erik rested on top of the blanket between them, interlacing their fingers.

“Erik,” he began, the slightest hint of trepidation threading through his voice, even though a smile twitched at the corners of his mouth. “Would I be correct in thinking you aren’t too enchanted with the idea of going to England?”

Erik paused for a moment, bringing Charles’ hand to his mouth for a kiss as he stalled. “Yes,” he replied at last. “I want to be where you are, but I don’t want to be somewhere where people would think of me and my family as entertainment and profit.”

Charles’ smile was sad. “I couldn’t agree more,” he said quietly, and Erik felt his stomach flip, not quite daring to believe what he’d just heard. The smile Charles was offering widened to something genuine, and he tugged gently on their joined hands, a silent request for Erik to scoot closer, which he did.

“I can’t go back. Not now,” he continued, running the fingers of his free hand gently down Erik’s cheek. “I’m sorry for making you think you had to leave all this behind. And I’m sorry for not realizing what Shaw was up to sooner. It was stupid of me. It could have-”

“That wasn’t your fault,” Erik cut him off. “Don’t blame yourself for what he wanted to do. No one else saw it either. It’s okay. We’re fine now, that’s all that matters.”

Charles bit his lip, looking contrary, but with a stern look from Erik, he seemed to decide to drop it. He sighed theatrically in defeat before snuggling closer to press sudden kisses along Erik’s jaw. “I talked to Raven about how I feel,” he said, the words slightly muffled against Erik’s skin. “I told her you said she could stay as well, and she wants to. She has a bit more time to make sure that’s the right choice, but as of now you’re stuck with the both of us, I’m afraid.”

Erik found it a bit difficult to swallow around the sudden lump that appeared in his throat. “I don’t know how I’ll manage,” he said a little thickly, kissing Charles abruptly before he could notice his tone.

Their lips brushed gently together, Charles’ tongue tasting of melon as it slid along Erik’s own. The complicated world outside ceased to exist, last night and that morning gone and forgotten, and the days that stretched ahead of them looking clearer and brighter than ever before. The corners of Erik’s mouth twitched upwards in a contented smile, and absentmindedly, he loosened his grip on Charles’ fingers so their hands pressed together, matching perfectly from palm to fingertip.


	19. Epilogue

With a soft cry, Erik pitched forward and landed against Charles’ chest, breathing heavily into the space between his neck and collarbone. His legs were burning where they rested on either side of Charles’ hips, straddling him, but it was a good sort of burn, and when Charles began soothing his palms up and down his thighs it felt even better. He moaned, pressing a sloppy kiss to Charles’ neck, which earned him a kiss against his temple in return. He could feel Charles smiling against his skin.

They stayed like that for a bit longer, catching their breath, until finally, Charles shifted, swatting Erik lightly on the hip. “Come on,” he said quietly. “Up. You’re starting to stick.”

Erik made a face, but rolled over onto his side anyway, his limbs starting to feel a bit like jelly. Gently, Charles slipped out of the bed and padded across the floor of the tree house to the small basin they kept in the corner that acted as a sink. Erik kept one eye cracked open to watch him go, grinning at the way the moonlight from the open window made Charles’ skin look that much paler.

Three years living in the jungle meant Charles wasn’t as starkly white as when he first arrived, but his skin was still paler than Erik’s, and Erik found he liked that. He liked to kiss his way across the milky expanse of his stomach and back, kissing his freckles and mouthing at muscles that hadn’t been so defined before but now were out of sheer necessity. Erik had insisted on giving both Charles and Raven “survival training” during their first full month of living here. Charles now knew how to throw and fight with a spear, although he always said if he ran into any leopards he would fend them off with the blunt end and wait for Erik and Raven to do the dirty work.

There was a quiet splashing sound as Charles dipped a washcloth into the basin, then turned back to the bed, wiping down his chest and stomach as he went. He must have felt Erik gazing intently at him, because he looked up, meet his eyes, and drew a swipe down his sternum, cleaning off the last of Erik’s cum.

“Good lesson, then,” he said idly, sliding back under the covers and running the washcloth over Erik now, across his front, then slipping it between his legs briefly before moving to the insides of his thighs.

“Mmm,” Erik hummed his agreement.

Moira had just returned, as she had the past two summers, on another research expedition funded by the Xavier fortune. When Charles and Raven had first decided to stay with Erik, they’d all (stupidly) assumed it meant they’d never be able to see her again, and Moira had been quick to correct them. She’d offered to manage Charles’ family’s accounts on the condition that she could use a small fraction of the money to fund return journeys to Africa for research and, of course, to visit her friends. Charles had needed no further convincing and had given her all the information she needed right away.

Often when Moira came back to them, she liked to bring small delicacies from home as gifts along with the supplies they needed, and this time she’d brought chocolate. Erik found himself pleasantly surprised by the mix of bitter and sweet when he’d first bit into it, and after dinner, when they’d left Raven and Moira back at camp, Charles had taken the opportunity to teach Erik a new word: aphrodisiac.

Once they were both clean, Charles set the washcloth on the small table next to his side of the bed, slinking down the mattress to sidle up to Erik, curling so close their noses were almost brushing. Erik, sleepy and sated, wrapped an arm around Charles’ waist, the ridge of the old scar standing out just slightly against his skin. He dropped a quick kiss to Charles’ forehead then let his eyes droop, fully intending to float off into sleep. After a quiet moment, however, Charles spoke up again.

“Erik…” he began hesitantly. “Raven told me before we left that she’s thinking of going back with Moira when the boat comes again.” Surprised, Erik stiffened for a moment, but Charles continued. “She says she’ll come back again next summer, but she just… misses things, I think.”

“That’s understandable,” Erik said slowly, then after a pause added, “do you miss things?”

“Of course I do,” he replied immediately, leaning into Erik all the same, kissing him soft and quick on the jaw. “The jungle is my home now. I love you and your family, and they’re my family now too. Nothing could ever be worth leaving you, but there are some things I miss. And the way Moira’s been able to come and go… I just thought maybe having both things isn’t as impossible as I believed at first.”

Silence settled over them again as Erik began processing what Charles was saying. Initially, he’d been so angry the thought of going to the human world made him sick, but that was beginning to fade now. He loved his home, but he was curious again, and he’d begun to realize that shutting out the things about the rest of the world he didn’t like wasn’t a great way to live.

“I’m not asking you to choose between me and your family,” Charles said quietly. “I guess I’m just asking you to think, while Moira’s here, if we could try something new just for a bit. Nine months in England, then come back with Moira next summer. Just you and me together, doing whatever we want, no traveling around the world being famous and meeting other famous people, just us being us. And if you’re not ready, that’s alright, I won’t blame you. I just… want to talk to you about it.”

Erik thought for a moment, then sighed, pulling Charles closer and kissing him slow and calm. “I’ll have to think about it a bit more,” he said softly between kisses. “But I’m not completely opposed.”

Charles smiled. “We have all the time in the world.”

Some time later, when they finally broke apart, Charles nuzzled gently at Erik’s lips. “I love you,” he whispered, pressing their palms together.

Erik wrapped his other arm tighter across Charles’ back, pressing one last kiss to the corner of his mouth. “I love you too.”


End file.
